I got this off an e-mail from a friend, so this is not mine and I take no claim in it. Please don't do these things in real life, it's just for fun and a good laugh. And if 당신 do do these things (number 4 fo example), than I'm sorry but you're really dumb.
Enjoy!
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6 Ways On How To Deal With 상어 Attacks:
1) DON'T SWIM IN THE SEA
더 많이 than 99% of 상어 attacks happen in large watermasses- also know as oceans. An easy way to tell if 당신 are in an ocean is to taste the water- it will taste like salt.
2) SWIM ALONGSIDE FAT PEOPLE
Make sure that there are always fat people in the water with you. Odds are that 당신 can swim faster than them- increasing your chances of escape.
3) SUNBLOCK
Replace the sunblock of the person 다음 to 당신 with BBQ rib sauce.
4) DON'T GO INTO THE WATER WITHOUT A KNIFE
As soon as 당신 spot a shark- furiously stab the person 다음 to you. As soon as he is bleeding proufusely- swim away as fast as 당신 can.
5) LISTEN CAREFULLY
Every 상어 has a theme song. If 당신 here the following- swim for your life: da-dam. da-dam. da-dam if it's fast like this: dadam, dadam, dadam- give up -you are already screwed.
6) DON'T PANIC
Stay calm if a 상어 has got you. At this late stage 당신 are screwed in any case- survival is not an option... The people on the 바닷가, 비치 do not appreciate someone screaming & shouting like a lunatic- it just isn't pleasant -think of the children damnit!
Happy swimming! :D
Enjoy!
__________________________________________________
6 Ways On How To Deal With 상어 Attacks:
1) DON'T SWIM IN THE SEA
더 많이 than 99% of 상어 attacks happen in large watermasses- also know as oceans. An easy way to tell if 당신 are in an ocean is to taste the water- it will taste like salt.
2) SWIM ALONGSIDE FAT PEOPLE
Make sure that there are always fat people in the water with you. Odds are that 당신 can swim faster than them- increasing your chances of escape.
3) SUNBLOCK
Replace the sunblock of the person 다음 to 당신 with BBQ rib sauce.
4) DON'T GO INTO THE WATER WITHOUT A KNIFE
As soon as 당신 spot a shark- furiously stab the person 다음 to you. As soon as he is bleeding proufusely- swim away as fast as 당신 can.
5) LISTEN CAREFULLY
Every 상어 has a theme song. If 당신 here the following- swim for your life: da-dam. da-dam. da-dam if it's fast like this: dadam, dadam, dadam- give up -you are already screwed.
6) DON'T PANIC
Stay calm if a 상어 has got you. At this late stage 당신 are screwed in any case- survival is not an option... The people on the 바닷가, 비치 do not appreciate someone screaming & shouting like a lunatic- it just isn't pleasant -think of the children damnit!
Happy swimming! :D
