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Q: What do elves learn in school?

A: The Elf-abet!

Q: What's the most 인기 wine at Christmas?
A: "I don't like sprouts" !

Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missletoe!

Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.

Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.

Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.

Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.

Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ?
A: Because it's to far to walk.

Q: What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?
A: Forty feet of track - all straight!

Q: What kind of bird can write?
A: A PENguin.

Q: How does Al Gore's household keep 크리스마스 politically correct?
A: On 크리스마스 morning, they give the presents TO the tree.

Q: What do 당신 call a cat on the 바닷가, 비치 at 크리스마스 time?
A: Sandy Claus!

Q: How do 양 in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
A: Fleece Navidad!

Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.

Q: Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?
A: Because it has long-distance runners on each side.

Q: What do 당신 call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

Q: What do 당신 get if 당신 deep fry Santa Claus?
A: Crisp Cringle.

Q: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?
A: We'll have a boo 크리스마스 without you.

Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on 크리스마스 Eve?
A: Okay everyone, sack time!!

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.

Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A: A subordinate claus.

Q: Why did the elf push his 침대 into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log.

Q: Why did Santa spell 크리스마스 N-O-E?
A: Because the 앤젤 had said, "No L!"

Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh?
A: Santa caught in a revolving door!

Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on 크리스마스 Eve?
A: Because it " soots " him!

Q: What do 당신 do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?
A: Pour Santa flush on him.

Q: Did 당신 hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gambel?
A: Its true . . . Comet cleans sinks!

Q: What do 당신 call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.

Q: Why does Scrooge 사랑 Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
A: Because every buck is dear to him.

Q: How come 당신 never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: Why did the little girl change her mind about buying her grandmother a packet of handkerchiefs for Christmas?Q: 올리브 ?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: Why is 크리스마스 just like a 일 at the office?
A: 당신 do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.

Q: Olive?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"

Q: What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.

Q: What's a good holiday tip?
A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block, where a group of ponies that are 프렌즈 live on the same block in Ponyville. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering*
Master Sword & Tom: *Standing in front of a house*
Master Sword: 저기요 everypony.
Audience: *Clapping*
Tom: Remember in the 이전 episode how 당신 said we might get killed 의해 assassins working for Warner Brothers?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Yes.
Tom: Well that happened to me.
Master Sword: Okay. How are 당신 still alive?
Tom: Now wait a minute. Did I say that I died? No! 당신 have to listen man.
Audience: *Laughing*...
continue reading...
video
랜덤
added by 27-5
added by r-pattz
This is a very nice video made 의해 julesreverie on Youtube. It tells of 7 [Actual] very gruesome deaths at Disneyland. The last death.. Make sure 당신 have your sound turned down =) 또는 you're in for a fright.
video
added by IloveDxC
added by BartyJrLvr
added by aholic
Source: http://www.stmargarets.org.nz
added by edwardrobertcul
video
added by azkaban
video
랜덤
funny
weird
stupid
ghetto
dora the explorer
nahson
added by Iheartdrwho
added by jlhfan624
Source: 1280x800.com
added by Draculaura10
added by edwardrobertcul
added by Quirnechia
added by randomgirl3000
Source: 9gag
added by 050801090907