Q: What do elves learn in school?
A: The Elf-abet!
Q: What's the most 인기 wine at Christmas?
A: "I don't like sprouts" !
Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missletoe!
Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.
Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.
Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.
Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.
Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.
Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ?
A: Because it's to far to walk.
Q: What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?
A: Forty feet of track - all straight!
Q: What kind of bird can write?
A: A PENguin.
Q: How does Al Gore's household keep 크리스마스 politically correct?
A: On 크리스마스 morning, they give the presents TO the tree.
Q: What do 당신 call a cat on the 바닷가, 비치 at 크리스마스 time?
A: Sandy Claus!
Q: How do 양 in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
A: Fleece Navidad!
Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.
Q: Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?
A: Because it has long-distance runners on each side.
Q: What do 당신 call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!
Q: What do 당신 get if 당신 deep fry Santa Claus?
A: Crisp Cringle.
Q: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?
A: We'll have a boo 크리스마스 without you.
Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on 크리스마스 Eve?
A: Okay everyone, sack time!!
Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.
Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A: A subordinate claus.
Q: Why did the elf push his 침대 into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log.
Q: Why did Santa spell 크리스마스 N-O-E?
A: Because the 앤젤 had said, "No L!"
Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh?
A: Santa caught in a revolving door!
Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on 크리스마스 Eve?
A: Because it " soots " him!
Q: What do 당신 do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?
A: Pour Santa flush on him.
Q: Did 당신 hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gambel?
A: Its true . . . Comet cleans sinks!
Q: What do 당신 call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.
Q: Why does Scrooge 사랑 Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
A: Because every buck is dear to him.
Q: How come 당신 never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
Q: Why did the little girl change her mind about buying her grandmother a packet of handkerchiefs for Christmas?Q: 올리브 ?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
Q: Why is 크리스마스 just like a 일 at the office?
A: 당신 do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
Q: Olive?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
Q: What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.
Q: What's a good holiday tip?
A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.
A: The Elf-abet!
Q: What's the most 인기 wine at Christmas?
A: "I don't like sprouts" !
Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missletoe!
Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.
Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.
Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.
Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.
Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.
Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ?
A: Because it's to far to walk.
Q: What was wrong with the boy's brand new toy electric train set he received for Christmas?
A: Forty feet of track - all straight!
Q: What kind of bird can write?
A: A PENguin.
Q: How does Al Gore's household keep 크리스마스 politically correct?
A: On 크리스마스 morning, they give the presents TO the tree.
Q: What do 당신 call a cat on the 바닷가, 비치 at 크리스마스 time?
A: Sandy Claus!
Q: How do 양 in Mexico say Merry Christmas?
A: Fleece Navidad!
Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.
Q: Why does Santa's sled get such good mileage?
A: Because it has long-distance runners on each side.
Q: What do 당신 call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?
A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!
Q: What do 당신 get if 당신 deep fry Santa Claus?
A: Crisp Cringle.
Q: What did the ghosts say to Santa Claus?
A: We'll have a boo 크리스마스 without you.
Q: What did Santa shout to his toys on 크리스마스 Eve?
A: Okay everyone, sack time!!
Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.
Q: If Santa Claus and Mrs. Claus had a child, what would he be called?
A: A subordinate claus.
Q: Why did the elf push his 침대 into the fireplace?
A: He wanted to sleep like a log.
Q: Why did Santa spell 크리스마스 N-O-E?
A: Because the 앤젤 had said, "No L!"
Q: What goes Ho, Ho, Swoosh, Ho, Ho, Swoosh?
A: Santa caught in a revolving door!
Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on 크리스마스 Eve?
A: Because it " soots " him!
Q: What do 당신 do if Santa gets stuck in your chimney?
A: Pour Santa flush on him.
Q: Did 당신 hear that one of Santa's reindeer now works for Proctor and Gambel?
A: Its true . . . Comet cleans sinks!
Q: What do 당신 call people who are afraid of Santa Claus?
A: Claustrophobic.
Q: Why does Scrooge 사랑 Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer?
A: Because every buck is dear to him.
Q: How come 당신 never hear anything about the 10th reindeer "Olive" ?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
Q: Why did the little girl change her mind about buying her grandmother a packet of handkerchiefs for Christmas?Q: 올리브 ?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
Q: Why is 크리스마스 just like a 일 at the office?
A: 당신 do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
Q: Olive?
A: Yeah, 당신 know, "Olive the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names"
Q: What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
A: It was wound up already.
Q: What's a good holiday tip?
A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.
These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations:
1.ADVERTISING SIGN:
A sign infront of an advertising agency in south super highway,"Rome wasn't build in a day.If it was,we would have hired the contractor."
2.VALENTINE CARDS:
"Now available in multi-packs."
3.IN A RESTAURANT:
"Open seven days a week and weekends."
4.IN A CEMETERY:
"People are prohibited from picking 꽃 from any but their own graves."
5.ON A ROLLER COASTER:
"Watch your heads."
6.ON THE GROUNDS OF A PUBLIC SCHOOL:
"No trespassing without permission."
7.ON A TENNESSEE HIGHWAY:
"When this sign is underwater,this road is impossible to pass."
8.IN FRONT OF NEW CAR-WASH:
"If 당신 can't read this, it's time to wash your car."
9.IN FRONT OF USED CARS :
"Why go elsewhere to be cheated, come here first."
10.OUTSIDE A COUNTRY SHOP:
"We buy 정크 and sell antiques."
P.S. 당신 can tell 더 많이 in your comments.
1.ADVERTISING SIGN:
A sign infront of an advertising agency in south super highway,"Rome wasn't build in a day.If it was,we would have hired the contractor."
2.VALENTINE CARDS:
"Now available in multi-packs."
3.IN A RESTAURANT:
"Open seven days a week and weekends."
4.IN A CEMETERY:
"People are prohibited from picking 꽃 from any but their own graves."
5.ON A ROLLER COASTER:
"Watch your heads."
6.ON THE GROUNDS OF A PUBLIC SCHOOL:
"No trespassing without permission."
7.ON A TENNESSEE HIGHWAY:
"When this sign is underwater,this road is impossible to pass."
8.IN FRONT OF NEW CAR-WASH:
"If 당신 can't read this, it's time to wash your car."
9.IN FRONT OF USED CARS :
"Why go elsewhere to be cheated, come here first."
10.OUTSIDE A COUNTRY SHOP:
"We buy 정크 and sell antiques."
P.S. 당신 can tell 더 많이 in your comments.
