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posted by moodystuff449
I'M THINKING.... BUT NOTHING'S HAPPENING!

I'm not smiling at you, I'm just trying not to laugh. :)

I'm not lazy, I'm just happy doing nothing.

(*)Theres always a light at the end of a tunnel, just pray its not a train(*)

My imaginary friend thinks your crazy.

Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, 당신 can be impossible?

Be nice to your kids, they choose your nursing home.

Dont steal, the government hates competition.

Sarcasm is just one 더 많이 service I offer.

Ask me about microwaving 고양이 for fun and profit.

Earn easy cash in your spare time 의해 blackmailing friends.

Reality is the only obstacle to happiness.

Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Those who live 의해 the sword get shot 의해 those who don't.

I 사랑 cats... They taste just like chicken.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with 불, 화재 at one end and a fool at the other!


MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master


LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either


CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied 의해 the number present


COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece


TEARS:
The hydraulic force 의해 which masculine will power is defeated 의해 feminine water-power!...
continue reading...
NOT 의해 ME~~~~~~♥♥♥

1. Don't tell us when 당신 think other girls are hot.
2. Whenever possible, please say whatever 당신 have to say during commercials.
3. If 당신 don't act like soap-opera guys, don't expect us to dress like Victoria's Secret models.
4. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
5. There is no such thing as too much spooning.
6. We think about 당신 ALL the time.
7. This is how we see it . . . Don't call = Don't Care.
8. Which also means that if we don't call, take the hint.
9. We like 당신 to be a little jealous . . . but overly possessive is not necessary.
10. We hate that 당신 can eat all you...
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1. Drive through the drive-thru in reverse and let your passenger order.

2. Ask the price of almost everything on the menu and then order something that 당신 didn't ask the price for.

3. Tell the employee that your window is broken. Order and then pay with your door open. When the 음식 comes, roll down the window and snatch your order from their hands.


4. Go to McDonald's and demand a big breakfast at 11:30 at night. Put up a fight.


5. Pay for a large order in pennies.


6. Drive in circles around the drive through, ording just one item of your order each time 당신 pass the window. For added fun,...
continue reading...
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