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바탕화면
불, 화재
posted by Shelly_McShelly
1. If using a touch-tone, press 랜덤 numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.

2. Make up a charge-card name. Ask if they accept it.

3. Use CB lingo where applicable.

4. Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.

5. Terminate the call with, "Remember, we never had this conversation."

6. Tell the order taker a rival 피자 place is on the other line and you're going with the lowest bidder.

7. Give them your address, exclaim "Oh, just surprise me!" and hang up.

8. Answer their 질문 with questions.

9. In your breathiest voice, tell them to cut the crap about nutrition and...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
1. "Do not use if 당신 cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet." -- In the information booklet.

2. "Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.

3. "For external use only!" -- On a curling iron.

4. "Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron.

5. "Do not use in shower." -- On a hair dryer.

6. "Do not use while sleeping." -- On a hair dryer.

7. "Do not use while sleeping 또는 unconscious." -- On a hand-held massaging device.

8. "Do not place this product into any electronic equipment." -- On the case of...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Colonel Sanders
There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. 당신 can't do any business from there.

Roseanne Barr
Experts say 당신 should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

W.C. Fields
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Milton Berle
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.

George Gobal
If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching 텔레비전 의해 candlelight.

Groucho Marx
I find 텔레비전 very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the...
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WELDONE!

YOU HAVE FAILED TO IGNORE THIS MESSAGE TO 당신 - THE PERSON WHO FAILED!

dear fellow 팬팝 failures...

i have failed to bring 당신 the news of fail blog sooner...

some of 당신 may know but the rest of 당신 probabley fail to know what im talking about. well fail blog is the brand new fail site. it's stuffed full of posts of your 일 to 일 FAILS. it does have the occasional win... there are the most 랜덤 posts of failed 사진 shots of failures 게시됨 의해 dedicated failed fail-er fail finders some are plain stupid but it won't fail to make 당신 laugh! 당신 can take failed pictures your self...
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Hey,it's werewolflover.you seemed to like my other 기사 like this so here's another one.I hope 당신 enjoy and please rate and comment.
#1 sit in your front yard and every time someone walks 의해 (even a dog) moo where they can hear.
#2 Have a 차 party with Mr.Wiggles.If anyone wals 의해 say "would 당신 like to 가입하기 us?"
#3 scream at everyone to hide because the 담홍색, 핑크 fuzzy bananas are taking over the world.
#4 go to a park/any large grassy area where people are,sit down and scream.
#5 Start coughing and then say "sorry my chipmunk,Fred was trying to get out of my stomach.Then say to Fred,be good 또는 I'm taking your DS away.
I personally think my first one was better,but what do ya think?
1. Go to a Miley Cyrus 음악회, 콘서트 with an obsessed Twilight Fangirl, and go up on stage with her in the middle of the 음악회, 콘서트 and talk about Edward Cullen (fangirl 또는 not). Make sure 당신 both wear My Chemical Romance T-Shirts.

2. Make a gossip magazine write about a Joe Jonas and Robert Patterson scandal.

3. Tell Selena Gomez 또는 Demi Lovato that they're bad role models.

4. Diss Selena Gomez's fasion style.

5. Bring Marilyn Manson and Gene Simmons (both with makeup) to the set of Sonny With A Chance.

6. Compare Joe Jonas's 재킷, 자 켓 in "Burnin Up" and a The Black Parade jacket. Farmiliar?

7. Morph Miley...
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Show this to your math teacher, and tell me what his/her reaction is! ^_^

Pi = 3.
141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399 375105820974944592307816406286208998628034825 342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582 231725359408128481117450284102701938521105559 644622948954930381964428810975665933446128475 648233786783165271201909145648566923460348610 454326648213393607260249141273724587006606315 588174881520920962829254091715364367892590360 011330530548820466521384146951941511609433057 270365759591953092186117381932611793105118548 074462379962749567351885752724891227938183011 949129833673362440656643086021394946395224737...
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"ATTENTION TDI AND TDA FANS!!!! GUESS WAT... FOR TOTAL DRAMA ACTION EPISODE 14 IS COMING OUT IN 3WEEKS!!!!!!! I REPEAT 3 WEEKS!!!! OMIGOSH THIS IS BIG NEWS THE EXACT 날짜 IS: September 1, 2009 in both canada and the usa every1 should watch!!!!!!"
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My friend 게시됨 these on her bebo page a while 이전 so I thought I'd share them with 당신 :D

1) Bring a pillow. Fall asleep until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say ``oh geez, better get cracking'' and do some gibberish work.

2) Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming ``Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!''

3) If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the surface integral symbol.

4) Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.

5) Talk the entire way through the...
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posted by shiriny
one in 10 of the world's population is left handed.
four out of five machintosh computer designers were left handed,and one out of four Apollo astronauts were left handers too.

더 많이 famous left hander:

drew barry more

Angelina jolie

nicole kidman

Marilyn monroe

demi moore

Mary-kate and ashley olsen

julia roberts

Hans christian anderson

mark twain

Billy 레이 cyrus

celine dion

Pierce brosnan

jim carry

Hugh jackman

brad pitt

Michelangelo

leonardo davinci

Picasso

newton

Albert einstein

george bush

charlie chaplin

cary grant

napeleon bonaparte

bill gates

marie curie

rachel adams

mark spitz
posted by shiriny
-chocolate kills dogs! True, 초콜릿 affects a dog's 심장 and nervous system. A few ounces is enough to kill a small sized dog.

-Ketchup was sold in the 1830's as a medicine.

-Leonardo da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time.

-Leonardo da Vinci invented scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.

-Marilyn Monroe had six toes on one foot.

-A cockroach can live for 10 days without a head

-Brains are 더 많이 active sleeping than watching TV

-There are 더 많이 chickens than people in the world

-The thumbnail grows the slowest, and the middle nail grows...
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posted by BellaCullen96
After 당신 cut off a vehicle, give a "Thanks-for-letting-me-in" wave and nod to the other driver.
Always save your nose picking for when you're behind the wheel.
Drive closely behind speeding ambulances and 불, 화재 trucks so 당신 get ahead of everyone who pulls over to let them pass.
Drive with a pen and ATM envelope in your hand and write down everything a moron driver does.
If another driver honks at you, ignore it, continue to do exactly what 당신 are doing, and give him a dirty look.
If another driver is courteous enough to let 당신 in front of him/her, show your appreciation 의해 letting the entire...
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posted by BellaCullen96
Take large objects on the train with you.
Sing songs. Start a round with everyone on the train.
Eat onions and garlic and talk to the people 다음 to you.
Sell stuff.
Stand in front of the doorway and glare at people when they try to get by.
Yell to your 프렌즈 at the other end of the train.
Make fun of other people while they are in hearing distance of you.
Ride the train while drunk. Extra points if 당신 throw up.
Constantly ask people for directions.
Ask people where they are from.
Ask people where they are going.
Quiz people on the meaning of life.
Start a game of poker. Extra points if it's strip poker....
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Ask everyone 당신 meet, "Hot enough for you?"
Sing the "Barney" theme song as loud as 당신 can.
If 당신 see kids building a sand castle, say, "That's not a real castle!"
Every time when you're about to 오리 under the water, yell, "Down periscope!"
Go swimming in a full business suit. If people notice, act like they're the weirdos.
Put sea shell to your ear and announce to first person to pass by, "It's for you!" Repeat several times.
Throw jellyfish around.
Tune radio to all-news station and blast as loud as 당신 can, then nod your head and snap your fingers like you're listening to some happenin' tunes.
Act like a sea gull.
Wear t-shirt that says, "I'm the coolest dude on this pathetic beach. No autographs please."
posted by boomy678
Materials:
Petroleum Jelly
Eyeshadow,body shimmer, 또는 pigments (for color)
small discardable and microwavable bowl
Discardable stirrer
lipgloss container with lids


Procedure:
1.Scoop some petroleum in the small bowl (more petroleum 더 많이 gloss!)

2.Microwave for 5 min 또는 completely melted

3.Take out the petroleum and mix in the eyeshadow keep on putting 더 많이 till 당신 reach your desired shade.

4.Mix well. Then pour in your mixture into the lipgloss container. Put in the freewer for 15-30 minutes.

Enjoy!!


Tip:to make flavored lip gloss add kool-aid instead (will stain lips).
posted by Mallory101
1. Recycle aluminum and glass.
2. Buy energy efficient appliances
3. Run clothes washers only when fully loaded, but don't overload
4. Plant a tree
5. Do all ironing at one time
6. Buy recycled paper
7. Buy low wattage 또는 compact fluorescent light bulbs
8. Turn off lights that don't need to be on
9. Use cold water instead of hot
10. Use small ovens 또는 stove-top cooking methods instead of your large oven
11. Bring your own reusable bags to the grocery store
12. Write companies urging them to use paper rather than plastics and styrofoam
13. Buy products that will last
14. Support environmentally conscious...
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posted by MrsPattinsonXO
Okay, so I was sitting on the 침상, 소파 last night watching some rubbish 텔레비전 show and texting my boyfriend Liam. Anyway I think he'd had too much sugar that night cause he was all like 'I feel special when I wear my 무지개, 레인 보우 colored raincoat' and stuff. So then he text and was like 'I 사랑 당신 soooooo much' and so I was like 'I 사랑 당신 more' and he was like 'NO!' and I was like Yes! and he was like 'No cause... cause... cause well I'm getting 당신 a birthday present! And so I'm like 'I'm getting 당신 one first' (cause his birthday is before mine) and then like ten 분 later he's like damn. And so I'm like 'I win'.

THE END
posted by big-fat-meanie
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www.google.co.uk/
barbie.everythinggirl.com/
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ten.com.au/
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au.tv.yahoo.com/
www.bratz.com/
uk.youtube.com/
www.messengerfreak.com/
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www.tv.com/
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www.jenniferlopez.com/
www.apple.com/itunes/
www.facedub.com/
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fotoflexer.com/...
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A little motavational poem I found link. Enjoy. ;P



At age 4, success is...not peeing in your pants.
___At age 12, success is...having friends.
____At age 16, success is...having a driver's license.
_______At age 20, success is...having sex.
________At age 35, success is...having money.
________At age 50, success is...having money.
_______At age 60, success is...having sex.
_____At age 70, success is...having a driver's license.
___At age 75, success is...having friends.
At age 90, success is...not peeing in your pants.
added by KateKicksAss