랜덤 기사 | Original 기사 on 팬팝

62

Further Proof that the Human Race is Doomed through Stupidity

posted by milorox18

In case 당신 needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.(that's the only time I have to work on my hair)

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson 겨울왕국 dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's just a suggestion).

On Tesco's 티라미수, 티라미스 디저트 (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh,...

2

how to make girl fall for 당신

posted by yukikiyruu

Listen to what she has to say.
Remember what she says.
Paying attention even when she isn’t around. Example? "I remember 당신 telling me 당신 사랑 that song 의해 So-and-so. It was playing the other 일 and it made me think of you."
Let her know she comes into your mind even when she isn’t around.
Compliment her.
Make her smile.
Give her enough 우주 to maintain her desired Independence.
Be there when she needs you. Even if it seems silly to you. Problems affect different people differently, so try to understand.
Don’t let her get away with disrespecting you. This may come as a surprise, but in every...

20

50 Fun Things to Do on the First 일 of School

posted by thatguywashot

1. Smoke a pipe and respond to each point the professor makes 의해 waving it and saying, "Quite right, old bean!"
2. Wear X-Ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to focus the overhead projector.
3. Sit in the front row and spend the lecture filing your teeth into sharp points.
4. Sit in the front and color in your textbook.
5. When the professor calls your name in roll, respond "that's my name, don't wear it out!"
6. Introduce yourself to the class as the "master of the pan flute".
7. Give the professor a copy of The Watchtower. Ask him where his soul would go if he died tomorrow.
8. Wear...

16

고양이 vs. 개

posted by flipflopkitteh

-Cats: Will treat 당신 like slaves.
-Dogs: Will always see the best in you.

-Cats: Do not bark.
-Dogs: Make it their life's mission to bark.

-Cats: Shred your furniture.
-Dogs: Shred your shoes.

-Cats: Insist on being fed.
-Dogs: Wait for 당신 to feed them.

-Cats: Will sleep on your face without a thought.
-Dogs: When allowed, will sleep on your 침대 and take up all the space.

-Cats: Will barf on your clothes.
-Dogs: Will barf on the rug.

-Cats: Think they're royalty.
-Dogs: Think they own the house.

-Cats: Will sleep on the remote then have a hissy fit (pun intended) when 당신 try to retrieve it.
-Dogs: Will...

9

A Very Personal Story......

posted by deathding

Lives. What do 당신 think of them? Have 당신 ever found true happiness? Did 당신 ever lose something valuable to you? Is there something constantly saying to 당신 on your mind, "Please Don't Happen!"
Well, those all make your emotions deep. It's actually pretty obvious, when somebody steals the last cookie from the cookie jar, 당신 get mad. Not on a personal level but anger gets induced into you.
Now, you're probably 읽기 this and wondering what the hell I'm talking about. Well, my life.
I am not going to complain that it sucks and everything is so boring and nobody has a soul, but there are just...

2

Need a Detective :)

posted by Kyssmig

There are five people. One of them shot and killed one of the other five. Which man is the murderer?

1. Dan ran in the NY City marathon yesterday with one of the innocent men.

2. Mike considered being a farmer before he moved to the city.

3. Jeff is a topnotch computer consultant and wants to install Ben's new computer 다음 week.

4. The murderer had his leg amputated last month.

5. Ben met Jack for the first time six months ago.

6. Jack has been in seclusion since the crime.

7. Dan used to drink heavily.

8. Ben and Jeff built their last computers together.

9. The murderer is Jack's brother. They grew up together in Seattle.

Consider yourself to be a detective....So who is the killer ??

3

it's very compilcated

posted by bubbletl

This is how it manifests itself:

I decide to water my garden.
As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing.
As I head towards the garage, I notice mail on the porch 표, 테이블 that I picked up from the postman earlier.
I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car.
I lay my car keys on the table, put the 정크 mail in the recycling box under the table, and notice that the recycling box is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the 표, 테이블 and take out the recycling first.
But then I think, since I'm going to be near the postbox when I take out the recycling...

2

The best mistake we ever made-Chapter One: Truth

posted by moolah

The best mistake We ever made
Earth 일 2011
By: moolah
Chapter One: Truth
Kaylynn looked over at her boyfriend, Beck. She’d just dropped a huge bombshell. She was pregnant. They were teenagers. They’d only been together for about 6 months. And had fallen in love. They’d had sex…and she went to the doctor because she had the “flu”. She’d found out, that it wasn’t the flu, she made him his 가장 좋아하는 meal-Mashed Potatoes and 옥수수 육수, 국물 and a 스테이크 with thick 육수, 국물 over it as well. Oh, and an 사과, 애플 Pie with his 가장 좋아하는 ice cream, Nutshell 땅콩 butter. Then,...

5

Lovely 조언

posted by RoCkInGAnGeLxX

Health:
Drink plenty of water.

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and 공식 만찬, 저녁 식사 like a beggar.

Eat 더 많이 foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less 음식 that is manufactured in plants.

Live with the 3 E’s - Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy

Play 더 많이 games.

Read 더 많이 책 than 당신 did in 2010.

Sit in silence for at least 10 분 each day.

Sleep for 7 hours.

Take a 10-30 분 walk daily. And while 당신 walk, smile.

Personality:
Don’t compare your life to others. 당신 have no idea what their journey is all about
.
Don’t have negative thoughts 또는 things 당신 cannot control. Instead invest...

5

interseting facts about girls

posted by yukikiyruu

Observation:

Guys never notice differences in their friend's appearance unless the difference is too obvious (like a very poor haircut that leaves the scalp like a partially mowed lawn). But with girls, it's not the case... Try walking to your friend who is a girl (the phrase girl friend avoided for obvious reasons) with a small stain on your 셔츠 which is usually unnoticeable. Chances are that 당신 would get caught within the first couple of minutes.

Care:

Guys try their best to be caring but come on... they are not designed for that! Girls often tend to care 더 많이 than what 당신 want them to and...

7

Things Not To Say To Your Parents While At College...

posted by iluvsmj

Are 당신 saying that I'm not good enough for Jack-in-the-Box?
Hey dad, are there any openings at your office?
I'm converting!
I'm coming out of the closet! Just kidding...hello? hello, anyone there?
I don't know, I think a nipple ring is very fashion conscience.
Who are 당신 again?
Mom, 당신 too can be saved.
I need 더 많이 money for my gambling ring.
Hold on a second, I have to get rid of the body.
Have 당신 ever tried Vivarin! I mean a lot of it at once! It's amazing. I wrote two papers, memorized the Spanish to English dictionary, made sis a sweater, invented a new way to dry laundry, and I- my, my heart.....

7

Obnoxious Things to Do in The Pool

posted by Shelly_McShelly

•    Stand on 상단, 맨 위로 of the high board and say 당신 won't come down until your demands are met.

•    Tell the lifeguards that they aren't doing their jobs because 당신 have seen at least 15 people drown today.

•    Ask people if they have seen your pet shark.

•    Sit in the baby pool and play with the toys.

•    Take a flutter board and pretend 당신 can't swim.

•     Hit strangers with your flutter board.

•    Ask an attractive lifeguard to practise...

5

저기요 World! I Have A Challenge For You!

posted by tdafan121

I know I've been going on about this a lot lately, but I want to challenge every single one of 당신 to try and start a chain reaction of kindness. I've recently had a Rachel's Challenge assembly at my school. We have one every few years. But this time, we had new material that really inspired me to begin my own chain reaction. Rachel's Challenge involves five challenges:
1. Look for the best in people
2. Dream big
3. Choose positive influences
4. Speak with kindness
5. Start your own chain reaction

Accepting and achieving these challenges isn't a hard thing to do if 당신 really decide to try. Showing...

6

랜덤 Facts!

posted by jeniffer2200

If 당신 have 3 quarters, 4 dimes, and 4 pennies, 당신 have $1.19. 당신 also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.

The numbers '172' can be found on the back of the U.S. $5 dollar bill in the bushes at the base of the 링컨 Memorial.

President Kennedy was the fastest 랜덤 speaker in the world with upwards of 350 words per minute.

In the average lifetime, a person will walk the equivalent of 5 times around the equator.

Odontophobia is the fear of teeth.

The 57 on Heinz ketchup bottles represents the number of varieties of pickles the company once...

5

What They Say vs. What They Mean

posted by smileypop9

Found this on www.funny.com. That site has so much funny stuff...lol

Women's English:
Yes = No
No = Yes
Maybe = No
I'm sorry = You'll be sorry
We need = I want
It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious 의해 now.
Do what 당신 want = You'll pay for this later.
We need to talk = I need to complain.
Sure go ahead = I don't want 당신 to.
I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, 당신 moron!
You're so manly = 당신 need a shave and 당신 sweat a lot.
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all 당신 ever think about?
Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.
This 부엌, 주방 is so inconvenient...

1

my life

posted by CUTEDXC

this is a true story about my life
(cj is my crush kara grace chloe ra'janir and rockstar23456 are my friends)

kara-ok amber (amber is me CUTEDXC)dont get mad at me but CJ sent me a 캔디 gram

me-WHAT!?!?!?! :o

grace-oh crap...HEY HOLD AMBER BACK

me-*start to chase kara while ra'janir and grace hold me back*

LATER

grace-why did u sent kara a 캔디 gram?

cj-cuz i like her

grace-*comes and tells me* umm...amber cj likes kara

me-...*drops books*...WHAT!?!?!?!?!

LATER me chloe grace and rockstar23455 are walking up the stairs

chloe-OK CJ DOES NOT LIKE KARA

cj is behind her when she said that

me-omg *runs...

5

i think

posted by shutyourface

i think

that 양 are the best animal in the world
and
바나나 are the best 과일
and
all vegetables are crap
and
clouds are better than smoke
and
fireworks are............um..........good?
and
a 양 should eat a 바나나 what then says
"VEGETABLES ARE CRAP!"
and then say
"i 사랑 clouds but SMOKE IS CRAP!"

i think

Justin Bieber is the worst thing that ever

i mean ever

happened to the 음악 business
and
lady gaga is the best thing what ever happened
to the 음악 business
and
양 should be able to eat people so that it can over populate the earth

SO WRITE A 코멘트 AND BECOME A 팬 OF ME
MY ARTICLE
AND WRITE A 코멘트

YA GET ME???!!!

:)

2

A 랜덤 Story

posted by TOTALIzzyluver

Gwen ran through the park. Her closet friend Annie had been kidnapped 의해 the 피자 Monster. She heard a scream in the distance. It was Annie's scream the same scream she heard that 일 they went to rider roller coasters at a local theme park. Suddenly Gwen heard giggling. The giggling belonged to one Annie Armstrong, the funniest person she knows and the best at drawing beavers during social studies. Annie was lying on the ground with a park bench lying on 상단, 맨 위로 of her.
"Annie! Are 당신 okay?" Gwen asked. "Don't worry Kathy, I'm as flippy as the 다음 hamburger!" Annie called out. "what?" "How...

2

50 상단, 맨 위로 randomest Sentences (And yes i got it from the person who made 100 상단, 맨 위로 words)

posted by RiverIce

100: CHEEECCKPOOOINT
99: Purple Monkey Dishwasher
98: 사과, 애플 pie... 또는 Pumkin?
97: Sit on your pockets! (Well known teacher saying)
96: mom mom mom mom mommy mommy mommmy mommmy mommy luis luis luis luis mama mama mama mama WHAT? hi.
95: Lawl
94: Baby turtles
93: 9000!!!!
92: Da da di da did did do do di da did di do!
91: MY POKEMON BRING ALL THE NERDS TO THE YARD AND THERE LIKE YA WANNA TRADE CARDS? DAM RIGHT! I WANNA TRADE CARDS I WILL TARDE YOU, BUT NOT MY CHARIZARD!
90: Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeck POINT!
89: 88, 87, 86, 85...
84: Online daters are desprete.... they rely on the internt!
83: mama I pooped
82: c'mon!...

6

if your Boyfriend is like this, then so god help you.

posted by KatiiCullen94

starting from a text from me
july 13, 3.02 pm
[i] 저기요 how was school"

3.03pm
Gay, yours?"

3.16om
"haha, yeah same"

3.22pm
"Since 당신 carnt do webcam, 당신 send me a pic;)"

3.22pm
"say that again and your gone"

3.23pm
"send me a pic"

3.48pm
"Fuck off, no respect for me"

3.50pm
"your just to serious"

3.52pm
No, i just have respect for myself, 당신 need to get that i dont live the please you. I dont appricate 당신 asking that of me."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mat'e says:
sook
Katii xD says:
fuck off. alright ive had enought of 당신 treating...