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Wow, what is this now? Now I know what we’re all thinking. Is this supposed to be an in-season April Fools joke? Is this like an epic prank gone wrong gone sexual? This can’t truly be, Nik. You’re not really going to tell us about the actual intelligence of this film. No…. I’m dead serious. This is a review of the film, a review that actually talks about Freddy Got Fingered… But positively. Yes. Really. So this film has been considered not just one of the worst films of the decade, not just one of the worst comedies ever, but it’s also been considered one of the worst 영화 of all time, with scathing reviews from all outlets and critics, and won many razzies including Worst Actor, Worst Director, Worst Couple, and more, which this film won nine of from the Golden Raspberries alone. However, something strange happened. Freddy Got Fingered got considered a cult classic. And not just a cult classic, but has gained re-evaluation in later years and is actually considered ahead of its time now. What happened? What made Freddy Got Fingered into a film worthy of re-evaluation. But before I ruin all my credibility in the span of a single article, we need to discuss some things. First off, the act of Dada



So the movement of Dada, 또는 Dadaism is a very complicated series of things. The origins are vague at best, and the movement hasn’t really been seen much outside of small niche audiences. Thank 당신 to the video on Freddy Got Fingered 의해 Nostalgia Woman and Kyle Kallgran, who brought up this ideology for the movie, so if 당신 want a better idea on that, there 당신 go. I won’t go into the long, long, long history that is this movement, so I’ll try to keep things simple. Basically, Dada was a form of, debatably, expression artform that was described as anti-art, a form of taking an art and making it something so… nonsensical. It derives its medium from sheer chaos, made to shock, offend, 또는 just confuse the general audience in some way. The act was not really respected at the time, with many of the art forms being banned when it first came, with even some artists being arrested for it. And with World War II, many of them were forced out of 유럽 with the rise of Axis powers, even Hitler considering it a degenerate artform. Look, Adolf, you’re just salty cause 당신 didn’t get to go to art school. Point is, after World War II ended and brought about a 더 많이 optimistic look to the future, the cynical nature of Dadaism died out, at least for a time. After that, musical artists like Chumbawamba and Frank Zappa were considered self-Dadaists in the form of making nonsensical stuff, and in the case of Chumbawamba, did it to shock and offend. Yeah, 당신 know the song, Tubthumping. Probably heard it in a ton of 영화 in the 90s and early 2000s? Yeah, that same band had an album where the cover had a baby popping out of the womb. I am not making this joke. So, to keep it simple, the art is all about offending. If 당신 are offended, it worked. But what also lied in the art form of just sheer madness also lied a sense of nihilism. While the point of the art is to be pointless, that’s kind of the meaning to it. There is no point to the art. And after World War I, the deadliest war that humanity had known at the time, artists kind of wondered what the point of anything was. So, in writing, in their art, in music, Dada was not just an act of offending and shocking for laughs, but to also drive 집 the fact that life is pointless and just bad. And, yeah, while that sort of nihilism isn’t exactly something I agree with, I perfectly understand it here. And yet, that movement would inspire so much work later on. From the aforementioned Frank Zappa and Chumbawamba, many nihilist authors and writers, and would create the strange surrealist sense of humor that we kind of toil in now… But we’ll get to that later. For now, now that we understand this point, this strange point of pointlessness, let us discuss the man himself. The star, writer and the bastard of Canada himself, Tom Green.

Part 1: Tom Green, Make Me Qreem



Tom Green is an… interesting fellow, to say the least. Aside from being a comedian that was made to put 랜덤 things in his mouth, walk up to people in the streets just to shock them completely, even making a big publicity of his actual, real testicular cancer that he thankfully beat and making a big stunt on Saturday Night Live where he was to marry his then-fiance Drew Barrymore live at the end, only for her to not show up at the show and just end, confusing so many viewers. Honestly, if not for the fact that Tom Green’s humor is… fucking disgusting, to say the least, the man is kind of inspirational. And I… never grew up with him. I tried asking my older brother, the most 90s kid guy I know. Yep, 90s kid. He’s 26 now. But yeah, he never knew him. I never knew him. The most I ever knew of Tom Green was that one cameo he had in Clone High, the pinnacle of human achievement. But the Tom Green Show on 엠티비 was considered a landmark, for many great gags like Tom Green painting 레즈비언 on his dad's car, putting a cows head in his dads bed, basically just tormenting his parents on live TV, among all sorts of acts that 십자가, 크로스 the line from “Is that okay for TV?” to “Is that even okay on a moral level?”. But a landmark nonetheless, as Tom Green’s antics would actually inspire another show of idiots hurting themselves and pranking each other for the entertainment of redneck Americans world wide, myself included. That show was Jackass. But his career was just getting started. Tom Green had finally made it big in Hollywood when he was cast to be in the film, Road Trip. The film was okay, but it made a shit load of money, and while being narrated 의해 Tom Green, 여우 decided to give Tom Green a movie. A full movie that he could make, on his own, with no limitations other than to keep it under NC-17. So, yes, for his roles in 텔레비전 and one movie role ever, Tom Green was given fourteen million dollars and total control over his movie. Fuck, man, Stanley Kubrick and Martin Socrses wish they could get that lucky on their first try. So, with $14 mil in his pocket and his hopes high, Tom set out to make the movie he always wanted to make. And how was it?!

Part 2: freddy got fingered



… huh. Well I mean… It’s not the worst comedy I’ve ever seen. I’d rather be shocked and offended then bored out of my skull. Okay, so, let’s talk about it. Freddy Got Fingered is a comedy film released in 2001. Yeah, 더 많이 tragedy that year. Hoo boy. It follows our hero, Gordy, a 28 년 old dead beat who dreams of being an animator but lives with his parents and deals with his disappointed father, played 의해 the late Rip Torn in one of his funniest roles. I never thought I would laugh so much at an abusive parent. The film is an 시간 and twenty seven minutes. And throughout this film, there is barely anything that happens plot wise. There are many scenes, like Tom Green swinging a salami around in peoples faces like his dick, jerking off a horse, wearing the skin of a dead deer and playing with it, licking the exposed broken bone of his friend, biting into a baby’s imbilecal cord and then swinging it around akin to fucking “So long, Gay Bowser”, and just sheer stupidity like scenes such as Daddy Would 당신 Like Some Sausage and The Backwards Man. And it isn’t until 50 분 exactly, yes, fifty 분 of this 시간 and twenty seven 분 long movie, just above thirty 분 left of the film, we get to the actual plot of the film, the thing the movie is named after, where Freddy, tired of his fathers constant insults and abuse, accuses his father in therapy for fingering his 25-year-old younger brother, Freddy, and gets him taken away. This plot goes nowhere and is just made for 더 많이 shock value. The film is full of so many scenes like this from beginning and ending, even other such horrid things, like a hospital called The Institute for Sexually Molested Children where they run around without supervision and watch Texas Chainsaw Massacre, and a running joke of this kid, the best actor in the movie, getting assaulted horribly, including getting a bottle smashed on his head, getting his teeth knocked out, and getting grinded up in an airplane propeller, but he says he’s okay, so it’s cool. This film is just shock and violence and sickening imagery and stupidity one after another. And I gotta be honest… I can’t believe I’m going to say this… But I kind of… enjoy it. Okay, here me out, please. Is Freddy Got Fingered a good movie? Fuck no. While the comedy fits my sick sense of humor, the film has many other issues. Plot lines that go nowhere and just don’t matter, and just exist to be pointless, and that doesn’t include the weird editing with the camera shots, the inconsistent lighting, the poor 연기 from some characters, and just the constant revolting imagery. But there’s just something about it. Like the film is so bad, yet it feels so lovingly crafted to be bad. Like the scenes are so shocking, and so horrid, that I find myself laughing with them. It also helps that I showed my grandma this movie. YES! Really! My poor 75 년 old grandma was born witness to this fucking travesty. And the thing is, we were hyperventilating with laughter. We were disgusted, we were uncomfortable, we both were probably experiencing a hate crime… But we were invested. There came a point where the madness just took us over and we were laughing with Freddy Got Fingered. Much like the Joker finding that life was actually a comedy, it felt like that. Aside from the part where we scream about society.



So yeah, Freddy Got Fingered is not a good movie. But it is an entertaining movie. How many 영화 are considered so bad, they’re good, 또는 ones that eventually become beloved classics? Like people nowadays forget that The Shining was a hated film at the time. People thought that the idea of a father killing their family was unsettling and cruel, which… no shit? It’s a horror film. You’re supposed to be uncomfortable. And yes, I did use The Shining to prove my point about Freddy Got Fingered. This is how far I’ve sunk. But think about it. The Room, Samurai Cop, Plan 9. Hell, Kung Pow: Enter the Fist is regarded as a trash tier movie, and yet so many people reference it all the time. Johnny Mnemonic is considered a garbage film, yet it’s one of the most influential cyberpunk films around. Also has Keanu Reeves, pre-Johnny Silverhand era. What I’m saying is, 당신 can be a bad film, but 당신 can still be entertaining. And if 당신 entertain, 당신 did your job and 당신 did it… right? Well 당신 did it. Being bad but entertaining is fine. Otherwise, if you're bad and you're boring, then 당신 have no point of existing, and yes, I mean you, Captain Marvel. And boy did this film fail. Not just critically, but at the box office. $14 million spent and $14.3 million gained. Yeah, that may not sound so bad, but that just makes it a waste of everyone's time. For a film to be a success, it needs to make back double what it spent. Otherwise, what the fuck was the point? And yeah, not only that, but everyone hated being in this film, pretty much, and no one brings up being in this film. Everyone… except Tom Green

Part 3: The Absolute Mad Lad

Tom Green was all about this film, crazy about it. Obviously, he was big into just doing his usual brand of humor, harassing his parents, fictional parents, but still. Putting 랜덤 things in his mouth, including animals, be it alive 또는 dead. And just being a menace to people. Hell, when 당신 make local screwball, Harland Williams, the straight man that 질문 the madness of another character… Well, shit, I don’t know if that’s an act of miscasting 또는 if that was just to prove the point that your character is 더 많이 insane than the man with a high pitched girl scream. But Tom Green made the film he wanted to make. And what he wanted to make was a total bastardization of the medium as a whole, something that would offend everyone, make everyone disgusted, and just be called trash. All paid for 의해 a giant billion dollar conglomerate and just watch as he burned all their money for fun. When Tom Green won his Razzie at the 2001 Golden 산딸기, 라즈베리 Awards, he came with pride, in a white Cadillac, a suit, and even brought his own red carpet. This man won nine Razzies and he was fucking egstatic. It could have won Worst Film of the Decade, but Battlefield Earth was just too shitty. He even advertises the bad reviews in the DVD pamphlet. Here, this is my physical copy of Freddy Got Fingered



And here is the pamphlet’s good review



And here’s the rest



So yeah, this man takes pride in his failure. He wanted to make the worst film ever and he succeeded. A film so hated and disgusted. But… the thing is… It kinda isn’t

Part 4: Wait, there’s 더 많이 of this bullshit?!

So yeah, as it turns out, Freddy Got Fingered may have been a pioneer for the film genre of dumb humor, as it is now considered on it’s official Wikipedia page a surrealist comedy film. The insane, almost maddening humor of Freddy Got Fingered, and how everyone is so casual to this man child’s escapades aside from his father who is falling into 더 많이 and 더 많이 madness as his son screws up his life 더 많이 and 더 많이 all feels like a nightmare. Especially the hospital scene where Freddy swings a baby around as these women chant in some sort of hymn as blood splatters the wall. And yet, why do I find the madness funny. Well, I think it has to do with me, personally. Because I grew up with a lot of Adult Swim shows as a kid. I watched all the classics growing up. Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Superjail, Metalocalypse, Moral Orel, and so many more. I even check out some of their 더 많이 recent and absurd stuff like The Shivering Truth and the ever topical Eric Andre Show. All that, mixed with the insane humor of the internet just adds to that. What I’m trying to say is that I like humor that is very abstract and absurdist. That’s the nice way of saying my humor is fucking retarded. This shit, right here?



Yeah, this is comedy gold to me. Basically, what I’m saying is that the comedy of Freddy Got Fingered holds up a lot. Now, am I gonna to sit here and say that Freddy Got Fingered is a better comedy than 영화 like Clerks 또는 Blues Brothers 또는 Fargo? Uh, fucking no. I mean, fuck, it’s barely funnier than Nacho Libre (BTW, Nacho Libre is good, don’t @ me, queermongers). But Freddy Got Fingered was ahead of the humor of the insanity and just sheer shock of it all. Maybe not on par with the quality of Eric Andre 또는 Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and really, the best absurdist comedy film ever was Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, that’s just a hard fact, but Freddy Got Fingered was very much a start of this humor. And hey, remember that pointlessness that was brought up, but also nihilistic? Well, really, isn’t this film nihilistic? Like Freddy Got Fingered is a gross out comedy about a grown man watching 동물 have sex and lets a parapallegic girl suck him off. But what the film is actually about is a crude and socially retarded grown man who wants to achieve something in his life, but is beaten down 의해 his emotionally and verbally abusive father, on 상단, 맨 위로 of hating the disabled and being a sexist pig. So he accuses his dad of being a child molester just to get back at him, ruining his fathers life and coming out on 상단, 맨 위로 only to piss all his fortune away in some absurd attempt to impress his father, with scenes of disabilities, violence, including that on children, and just sheer lack of care from the world around them. Is… is Freddy Got Fingered smarter than it actually is??? Ha ha ha! Oh, god, fuck no, this film is a fucking 쓰레기통, 쓰레기 수거통 fire. But it is a 쓰레기통, 쓰레기 수거통 불, 화재 I want to watch burn, examine the ashes, and try to find the value in it. And that brings me to my last point.

Part 5: For fucks sake, just like what 당신 want to like



Seriously, why is it that we have reached a point where we all have to agree on something just someone called it good 또는 bad. Look, I don’t care who 당신 are. I don’t care what 당신 like. If 당신 like something, and genuinely 사랑 it with a passion, then sick. But for god's sake, don’t go saying something is bad because someone on the internet 또는 a critic said it was trash, because that just keeps 당신 from forming your own opinions. If 당신 like Highschool of the Dead for the social commentary and how the tits and asses may actually be a commentary on teenage hormones, good for you. If 당신 think YIIK: A Postmodern RPG is a game that is worth talking about because of the insane 디자인 and story choices and are important for those reasons while having some genuine good ideas, good. And if 당신 watch a fucking psychotic film 의해 a mad man who attacks his parents and think, “Hey, this movie is pretty funny”, then good. I would rather 당신 사랑 something that is terrible and mean it, rather than agree with the general populace that it is terrible without seeing it. And vice versa too. Don’t just read this 기사 and say, “Ya know, maybe Freddy Got Fingered is good.” No! 당신 won’t know what 당신 like 또는 don’t like if 당신 don’t experience it for yourself. If 당신 are mildly curious about this movie, then go check it out. If not, that’s fine. But don’t hate it 또는 like it because someone said so. The reviews of people online are not gospel. This isn’t an Anton Ego from 라따뚜이 where my word on Freddy Got Fingered is my final word, THE final word. Because no. 당신 really think I have intelligence and influence to change minds? I just spent six hours on this, an 시간 and a half watching the movie a 초 time, two hours doing research on the movie, Tom Green, and some stupid art movement that no one knows nor cares about except art nerds and me, and the remaining spent typing this shit out while listening to fucking ska 음악 and drinking 나귀, 엉덩이 tasting energy drinks. I’m a faggot. But at least my opinion is my own. Make your own opinion. And don’t be ashamed to admit it. I’m not gonna call Freddy Got Fingered a guilty pleasure because that devalues the opinions of others, I think. I’m not gonna say, “So I like Freddy Got Fingered. Pretty cringey, am I right, fam?”. No. Fuck that. Fuck you! I like Freddy Got Fingered. Finger my boyhole if 당신 don’t like it. (Just kidding, I 사랑 you. Please don’t divorce me).
So yeah, that about wraps it up. In conclusion, Freddy Got Fingered is trash. But I am a filthy raccoon man and I crave trash. And I leave 당신 with this. Tom Green had tried to get Gene Wilder, of Young Frankenstein and original Willy Wonka fame, to be his dad, but he refused as he thought the movie was offensive. Man, we could have had Willy Wonka call Tom Green a retard and a faggot, but… I guess in another lifetime. See 당신 later, masturbators.
The start and the only chapter: "Oh my god there's a sale on MINISKIRTS Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" "Envy just SHUT UP!!!! 당신 are a GUY NOT A GIRL!!!!" Lust yells at Envy as he stares at the miniskirt sale sign. "Hey 당신 bums want simethin 또는 are 당신 goin to keep starin in my store like a couple of freaks?" "Uh I guess that we can look around." "Come on Lust there is a sale on MINISKIRTS here lets go in and buy some MINISKIRTS!!!!!!!!!" Lust just groans as Envy dragged her in the store. "Um Lust?" "Yeah?" "Why is the Fullmetal Pipsqueak here?" "WHAT?!" "That voice, is that Envy and Lust? Al do 당신 hear...
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 James
James
선실, 캐빈 for the Summer
By: moolah
Chapter Nine: James

    I’m James Ricky Reese. I live with my little sister, Cassie, and my older brother (he’s a bum), Greg. I have a hot girlfriend named Chelsea and annoying parents named Kristi and Bobby.
     Anyways, I am 노래 my 가장 좋아하는 song, 21 총 의해 Green 일 whenever I hear the all American, annoying Beth scream. It’s not this scared, “It’s a spider” scream. It’s this really excited scream. “OH MY GOD HE’S COMING HERE TONIGHT!” I look over at her and expect her to be jumping up and down...
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선실, 캐빈 for the Summer
By: moolah
Chapter Seven: Laken


    Hi! I’m Laken Reese Barenshsky. I’m 19 and I live with my parents and my 15 년 old brother, Jason. I have the most wonderful, beautiful girlfriend, Tori. She’s pretty, she has long brown hair, that’s naturally curly, brown eyes and her smile is gorgeous, like I’ve just been snapped with the sun! God, she’s sexy.
    “GOALLLLLLLL!” I scream whenever I kick the 배 into the side of this 쓰레기통, 쓰레기 수거통 in the back of the store. Zack grumbles (because he’s a loser!) and we keep kicking this...
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posted by smileypop9
These 기사 are gonna be the thoughts on life and stuff, and this is part two.
I did this because I was bored, and because I wanna get my thoughts out.
---------

Rap in one word? Crap.
That's my opinion, so don't bash me.
.
Anyway, I hate that stupid drivel. Yeah ok, sorry kids, that I sound like your mother. But I really think that people who listen to rap could seriously use an update to their tunes.
Why would 당신 wanna listen to 음악 from people who wear their pants down to their knees, objectify women, and swear 24/7?
There's much better 음악 available.
...
People who listen to rap are kinda...
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The Dr. Z!!
By: moolah
(Note: I’ve changed both me and my friend’s name for privacy. I have also changed the name of the school, and my [math] teacher )
[P.S: For Ellen’s part, I am just guessing what happened when I was in the bathroom!]
True Story.

Scene: Applebee’s
Time: 7:50
Why: My birthday dinner
Who: Tabby(me) and Ellen(my friend)
Tabby’s P.O.V
    I had to go to the bathroom, so my friend Ellen and I went to the Applebee’s bathroom, and I knocked on the one door to a stall. “YES HONEY!” A woman *I think* who sounded strangely like a man laughed as she spoke...
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The following is a very fake letter! Trust me!

To the people of the future,
    My name is Andrea Reese. I live in Burke Clouds. I live with my mom (Kayla), my dad (George), my cousin (Annie), my two sisters (Ally and Aria). I have a brother (Chance) who is 18 and in collage. He’s nice to me, unlike my friend, Alexis, brother. I 사랑 my family. I go to Franco Bud Rose Middle School. I am happy. But, I have a serious cancer. It has no none cure, no chemo can cure it. I’ve had it for a 년 and a half and have been alive. My time is limited here, and I wanted to put this...
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posted by invadercalliope
Ingredients:
•4 cups steamed Japanese rice
•strips of dried nori (seaweed)
•salt to taste
•black sesame seeds
•*for fillings:
•ume (pickled plum) / grilled salted 연어 (small chunks) / kombu no tsukudani
Preparation:
Cook steamed rice. Put about a half cup of steamed 쌀 in a 쌀 bowl. Wet your hands in water so that the 쌀 won't stick. Rub some salt on your hands. Place the steamed 쌀 on your hand and put your 가장 좋아하는 filling, such as kombu-no-tsukudani, umeboshi, and grilled 연어 on the rice. Push the filling into the 쌀 lightly. Hold the 쌀 between your palms. Form the 쌀 into a round, a triangle, 또는 a cylinder 의해 pressing lightly with your both palms. Roll the 쌀 ball on your hands a few times, pressing lightly. 덮개, 랩 the 쌀 ball with a strip of nori 또는 sprinkle some sesame seeds on them.
voice: NEW FROM WHAT EVA THIS IS IT IS....... THE WHAT EVER IT IS!!!!!!!! This is made in the USA (china) made totaly 의해 americans (aliens) and it total IS NOT toxic!!!!!

Woman: I got my son the what ever it is for his berthday and he...

voice: LOVED IT!

Girl's friend: 당신 got the what ever it is?

Girl: ya. And I could not LIVE without my what ever it is.

Girl's friend: what does it do?

Girl: I don't know. But I 사랑 it!

Voice: the what ever it is is only $20 plus $100 shiping and handleing! but if 당신 call right now we will also send 당신 a what ever 당신 call it for double the price even though it is the same thing! we will also double it! Just pay $10000000 더 많이 dollers shiping and handleing! 당신 GET IT ALL!!!!! the what ever it is , the what ever 당신 call it! CALL NOW!!!

other voice: To get the what ever it it and what ever 당신 call it have 당신 credit cards ready and get ready for bankruptsey! CALL NOW!!!
posted by invadercalliope
CALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOO
OOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLL!!
HI EVERYONE I'M YOUR HOST INVADER CALLIOPE!
ITS THE THIRD EPISODE!
HURRAY!
TODAYS A VERY SPECAIL 일 BECAUSE I AFISHALY!
WELL TODAY OUR GUEST 별, 스타 IS......GIR!
BUM BUM B BUM!
Invader Calliope: HIIIIIII GIR!
Gir: HI!
Invader Calliope: Thats all 당신 have to say! HI!
AT LEAST ZIM STAYED IN CHARACTER WHEN HE WAS ON THE SHOW!
Gir: Sorry but it's hard to stay in character and
Invader Calliope: AND!?! 지르 EVERYONE LOVES 당신 THE MOST 당신 HAVE THE MOST 팬 GIRLS AND ZIM STAYED IN CHARACTER!
Oh no we are out of time good bye now and in joy the suprise picture!
The End!
Ok,Here are thingz that a am interested in!
Enjoy
Ok here are the biggest things i enjoy: Invader Zim,Video Games,Anime,softcore music,yaoi!
Here are some 영화 i am interested in:Invader Dib,9,The nightmare before x-mas,corpse bride,the ring,paranormal activity,some 아니메 movies,titanic
Here is some 음악 i'm interestes in:Gir,Invader Zim sound track,anime music,theme songs in tv shows,marilyn manson,my chemical romance,tokyo hotel,bella morte,drowning pool,evanescence
Here are some 책 i'm interested in:Anything Jhonen Vasquez,Manga,Invader Zim comics,batman comic books,animal books
posted by EmzLovesCheryl
Well, I'm bored, and depressed, so I've decided to list all the things I hate. Well, all the things I hate that I can think of!


1. Fire.
2. Small spaces.
3. The sound 당신 get when 당신 scratch a balloon.
4. Balloons in general. But just the rubbery ones, 당신 know, not the foily ones? Well I know what I mean anyway. :/
5. Nose bleeds.
6. Clowns.
7. Bullies and bullying.
8. School.
9. Spoilt bitches who think that everything is about them, and don't even think about others' feelings.
10. Seeing a loved one cry.
11. The awkward moments that seem to stalk my life.
12. Witnessing a situation that is nothing to do with you, and knowing that it's not going to end happily.
13. Having to exercise in in the boiling hot sun.
14. Those days when 당신 just feel like total crap.
15. PE.
16. Sharp knives.
17. 물고기 fingers.
18. The majority of green vegetables.
19. Being alone outside in the dark.
20. Watching someone suffer.
posted by moodystuff449
Thing are going round and round my head, 또는 maybe my head is going round and round in things. -(Diana Wynne Jones)Howl's Moving Castle

Sophie, I'm dying of boredom in here, 또는 maybe just dying. -(Diana Wynne Jones)Howl's Moving Castle

"You must admit I have a right to live in a pigsty if I want." — Diana Wynne Jones (Howl's Moving Castle)

"’I think we ought to live happily ever after,’ and she thought he meant it. Sophie knew that living happily ever after with Howl would be a good deal 더 많이 hair-raising than any storybook made it sound, though she was determined to try.

‘It should be hair-raising,’...
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posted by Blackteardrops
*** No offense to any one... Just randomness xD


If I Were a Boy PARODY

If I were a boy I would be gay
My guy liner would serve as a warning
I would 날짜 Adam Lambert
And he’d call me babe

And we would make out on stage
I'd 키스 who I wanted
But I’d probably get confronted
No one would stick up for me

If I were a boy
I think I would be gay
I would never 날짜 a girl
I swear I'd still 사랑 men

I'd watch Glee
'Cause I know it’s really awesome
When 당신 watch a brand new one
I’d invite my 프렌즈 over
And I wouldn’t let much change but

If I were a boy
I would be gay
I’d come out of the closet
And I’d push...
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posted by Puncky_Girl
brick:butch i'm going to sleep and don't broke something
butch:wait now?
brick:yea so what?
butch:oh come on brick! we can have a party!
brick:party? butch i want a pease!
butch:ok 당신 go...
(brick goes to his room)
butch:you leave your phone here brick? (took bricks phone) now let's send SMSes
(door 벨 rings)
butch:(looks in the hole) it's open
(mitch comes)
mitch:hey butch
butch:wow mitch wats up?
mitch:i just wanted my ball back (tooks his ball)
butch:hey what is in your pocket?
mitch:marker
butch:will 당신 give it to me?
mitch:what you'll give?
butch:umm brick's hat?
mitch:i don't want...
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posted by greenstergirl
Chapter one
Okay this is a really 랜덤 stroy but I was bored and I couldn't get this idea out of my head. In my opinion it is really badly written so sorry.

“Okay Class, 당신 have the rest of the period to finish this quiz. This is the last grade before your midterm so work well, and remembers what we studied,” Said my Mr. Grazing, my math teacher. He was the kind of teacher kids pick on and make fun of behind his back. I hate math, so I don’t care for him as a teacher much. He usually wears a sweater vest and weird 1950 glasses that squeeze his nose at the tip.

I stared at the Chapter...
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posted by Annacrombie
This is a true story that happened to me moments ago
____________________________________________________

I sat in my room, twenty past 11 trying to find 더 많이 crap on the internet
I herd a loud noise downstairs, then a crash, a slam of door and some slurred words
My parents were outta town and my lil sis was at a sleep over, what the hell was going on?
I put my laptop down and grabbed the nearest item, which was a lamp,
My brother Luca, aged 21, walked into my room, i could smell the acahol in his breath
"Who da sexiest lil sod in the world? 당신 are!" He pointed at me before colapsing on the floor,...
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User: So your a robot?


Cleverbot: No 당신 are a robot times 1000000.


User: No 당신 are a robot times 1000000.


Cleverbot: I am a human and 당신 are a robot.


User: User: 당신 robot.User: 당신 robot.User: 당신 robot.


Cleverbot: Hahahaha that was funny. 당신 are the robot here.

User: User: 당신 robot.User: 당신 robot.User: 당신 robot.

Cleverbot: No i'm not robot... 당신 computer?

User: So your a robot?

Cleverbot: Yes I 'd like to know how I can have my own bot.

User: So 당신 admit that your a robot?

Cleverbot: Yes. I am a robot.




LOL yes fail I know
i don't know if this is already on here. i feel lazy and don't feel like looking.

i found this on some joke website:

CAROLS FOR THE MENTALLY DISTURBED

SCHIZOPHRENIA: do 당신 hear what i hear?

DEMENTIA: I think I'll be 집 for Christmas

MANIC: deck the halls and walls and house and lawn and streets and stores and office and town and cars and busses and trucks and trees and 불, 화재 hydrants and...

PARANOID: santa claus is coming to get me

PERSONALITY DISORDER: 당신 better watch out, I'm gonna cry, I'm gonna pout, maybe I'll tell 당신 why

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER: jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell...
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posted by KitkatKaysa
Capricorn.

Your element: Earth
Your ruling planets: Saturn
Symbol: The Goat
Your stone: Garnet
Life Pursuit: To be proud of their achievements
Vibration: Poweful resilient energy
Capricorn Secret Desire: to be admired 의해 their family and 프렌즈 and the world at large

Description:
The sign of the high roller, Capricorn is regarded as the zodiac’s top, but also quiet, life and business achievers. But, there are two very different types of Capricorns.

The first is represented 의해 the mountain goat, always climbing higher and higher; never content until reaching the top. The 초 is the garden goat,...
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My Experience Ok (: I've Walked In Too The 음악회, 콘서트 Center ...:) I've Sat Down!!!! I've Seen I Was 13 Rows Back From The Stage ..... I've Wated 1 시간 Omg I Got Extremely Exited Then He Came On Yay!!! Ok But Then It Wassss So Boring He Was Just Staining There 노래 I've Tryed Going up Front Row Scruty Hunny Go Back To You're 좌석 Ooh K Then 드레이크, 드레이 크 Sad 당신 Guys Could Come Front Row If U Want!!!!! Omg I Ran There 드레이크, 드레이 크 Got So Much Better Touching My Hand Connecting With The 팬 팬 Was 노래 Along Giving Him 꽃 Stuffed Bares Sines We All Had Glow Sticks .:) [= Yeah We Loved It Let Me Know If You've Seen Him Live Thanks For 읽기 And You're Comments