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No, really, these are real posts.. I'm not making this up...


#1:
Who cares about remembering soldiers, long as it means a 일 off school, I'm happy!


#2:
I don't care if it's illegal, if a corpse looks hot, I'm fucking it!


#3:
JUST CAUSE I SUCKED YOUR COCK, DON'T MEAN WE DATING! I SUCKED YOUR COCK, BUT NOT YOUR HEART!!


#4:
I don't care about your shitty opinions! I like having sex with my father, it feels mature! So fuck off haters!


#5;
My kid is NEVER gonna watch Skrek! Disagree all 당신 want! Beautiful people don't go with ugly people! My daughter would grow up thinking she should change cause some ugly boy likes her! Why didn't 슈렉 change for Fiena!? Beautiful people are strong, ugly people are not! Why couldn't he change for Fiona!? Because woman have to do everything!


#6:
So I accidantly drank my sons pee.. Tastes even better than my husbands pee.. I 사랑 golden showers!


#7:
I don't want my baby boy to he straight, I want it gay.. If it's straight, I'll put it to adoption straight away!


#8:
Who trying to get me pregnant? I'll abort it 의해 summer.


#9:
Taking a dumb, 노래 sitting on a toliet!


#10:
So what if I get drunk every weekend! So what I smoke weed everyday! SO WHAT IF I'M 12! Get off my back!!


#11:
If 당신 hadn't 로스트 your viginity 의해 14, your a fucking loser, kill yourself! No offence.


#12:
Why don't 양 shrink when it rains? Their cotten, hahahaha!!


#13:
Let me make this clear for all 당신 "men" out there.. 당신 can't not hit a woman.. Even if she's physically abusing you.. Your be put to jail! Cause girls are protected 의해 law.. Girls can't abuse boys, only boys can abuse girls!.. If 당신 claim your girlfriend is abusing you! GOOD! 당신 deserve it for being a man!


#14:
I put my hand down my pants to adjest my balls, now my palm smells! #Gross


#15:
Child porn should be legal. The way I see it, people that rape kids would do it anyway. Child porn isn't at ALL an influence!


#16:
So if nuns don't have sex, they don't have kids. So why are they not extinct?


#17:
If Trump becomes president I'm moving back to Hawaii! Fuck America!


#18:
This is all BS! The Germans never did that to the Jews! But the Jews have done much worse to germans! Stop with your jewish lies about halocoust! Lets talk about 60 million nazi's that were killed for no reason after WW2! Not the fake 6 million Jewish deaths!


#19:
Gay rights! Woman rights! Gays and woman should be monitored!


#20:
My boyfriend and I been dating 5 years. He married this very wonderful woman last year. I helped him pick the ring, and opened an account to help him buy it. Here is my question. His visits have dropped to maybe once every 2 weeks, and when I complained about this, he said the only way he could see me 더 많이 is to pretended like he had a part time job, and had money to show for it. How much is fair to give him? And before 당신 call me stupid, this was my idea!


#21:
Nate of American indians need to 옮기기 back to indianapolis! I'm sick of immigration!


#22:
Right about now in my life I ain't got respect for grandmas, kids, aunties, non of that! IDFC if 당신 got cancer grandma, I'll slap your teeth in!


#23:
The worse thing isn't death! It's love! Cause 사랑 is evil, just spelled backwards!


#24:
A professor put HIS OWN DEAD CAT, in a FREEZER and left it, so the rest of us had to clean it! #Gross


#25:
WTF PEPSI??> Embaressing Kendall Jenner like that! On behalf of everyone. Sorry Jenner.


#26:
WE NEED TO 더 많이 BOMBS! WE DON'T FUCK WITH THE USA 또는 WE BOMB 당신 LIKE CHINA! FUCK CHINA!!


#27:
I can't wait for 7th grade! Time for sex, drugs, love, AND 더 많이 SEX!!


#28:
IF 당신 A DUDE!
DO NOT walk behind me, epically when she's alone.
DO NOT speed up when she speeds up.
DO pass her on the sidewalk.
예수님 men, be aware of aware for once in your LIFE!!


#29:
When life gives 당신 lemons, throw them the fuck away! Go buy a new batch 당신 bought, independantly, yourself! Make your OWN lemonaid! And enjoy every damn bit of that shit! When life hands 당신 things, it's never worth keeping.


#30:
I can't stand people who publically come out as gay! 당신 don't see straight people publically coming out as straight! Nobody cares that your gay! 당신 don't


#31:
Girls with eyes <333


#32:
I'm not a hooker! I just make money while being sexually pleasured, okay!


#33:
GTA V sucks, GTA 5 is better.


#34:
So was Abraham 링컨 really a vampire killer before he was president?


#35:
9/11 was a true tragedy for females. So many woman 로스트 there lives, and there husbands.. And who was responsible? MEN! Males destroyed the world trade centre cause deep down inside, they all have the mind set of barbarians. As a female, I’m glad our brains have developed to recognize good and evil.


#36:
Another reporter was killed today. I think the only solution is to create a Muslim holocaust. Put them in construction camps, and exterminate them from this world!


#37:
Saw my son’s penis at a scan today. #Impressed #Proud


#38:
If being Gay is natural, where are the gay babies!?


#39:
This is PSA to men. When we say something and 당신 disagree pretend to agree anyway. Cause when we hear “no your wrong” we get scared. With the amount of rape culture, we take it as a sign that your silencing us. And if 당신 continue to do so just cause 당신 arrogantly believe woman are wrong, than it’s a slippery slope to Misogyny and abuse.


#40:
I 사랑 jealous aggressive guys. That’s right. Beat me. Push me. Get in my face! Don’t ignore my arguments, argue back. Even if your wrong, win the argument. I’m a strong minded stubborn girl, and if 당신 let me walk all over 당신 I will. No girl wants a emotionally weak man. She wants a man who can put her in her place!
Alright basically the 제목 says it all so I'm just ganna jump into it.

1. Princess- it's a cute name for a girl who likes feeling really important and special

2. Beautiful/Gorgeous- basically it's one that every girl will 사랑 and 당신 don't have to worry about them not liking it

3. Sweetie Pie- okay this one is a good one if your girl is 더 많이 on the country side

4. Sweet Heart- another one that a lot of girls like

5. Babe/Baby- good most of the time

6. Kitten- this is a good one for girls who are either animal 연인들 또는 sweet, cute and playful

Look use these if 당신 want but in my opinion make up...
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posted by Bluekait
Your butt is wide, well mine is too
Just watch your mouth 또는 I'll sit on you
The word is out, better treat me right
'Cause I'm the king of cellulite
Ham on, ham on, ham on whole wheat, all right

My zippers bust, my buckles break
I'm too much man for 당신 to take
The pavement cracks when I fall down
I've got 더 많이 chins than Chinatown

Well, I've never used a phone booth
And I've never seen my toes
When I'm goin' to the movies
I take up seven rows

Because I'm fat, I'm fat, come on
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, 당신 know it
(Fat, fat, really, really fat)
You know I'm fat, I'm fat, come...
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At least a dozen times a 일 당신 hear "I hate society" and "society sucks," and people complaining and complaining about it, but here's the thing thing:

You say 당신 hate society, 당신 say 당신 can’t stand it. 당신 say 당신 hate your generation and the kids at your school and the people 당신 see on the streets around you, but you’re one of them.

You’re one of them, you’re a member of society, 당신 all are. 당신 were born this way, 당신 will die this way. 당신 are society, and society is you. 당신 are the constitute parts of each other, inseparable and indistinguishable. Your connection is binding...
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This is my gorgeous ,Beautiful, talented and inspirational hero Talia . Talia is a fighter .Talia was first diagnosed 6 years 이전 with with stage four neuroblastoma cancer, a tumor that develops from nerve tissue in infants and children, on Valentine's 일 in 2007.It was then that she first developed an interest in make-up .Now she has attracted over14million viewers to her video blog. Her make-up tutorials are amazing.She is always so positive and never loose hope. last summer Talia learned that she has neuroblastoma and leukemia 'at the same time' and the doctors were giving her only four...
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1. Dick Trickle

A NASCAR driver that sounds like he has symptoms of prostate problems. Yeah, this one definitely deserves the 상단, 맨 위로 spot on the list.

2. Rusty Kuntz
If he were a girl, it would possibly be number one on the list; nobody would want to mess with her.

3. Grant Balfour
Grant means “to give” and ball four represents a walk in baseball. Not exactly the best name for this Oakland A’s pitcher.

4. Pete LaCock
The capitalization of this name just makes it even worse. He gets the double whammy on the first and last name

5. Guy Whimper
He is a 6’5’’, 300lbs. offensive tackle for the Jacksonville...
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 Awesome
Awesome
Tianmen Cave known as Gateway to Heaven is a natural bridge/arch and is reportedly highest elevation (1520 meters) natural arch in the World. Although it is an arch but locals call it a cave. As per local history it used to be cave and in circa 263 there was a massive collapse of the cliff face, which changed the cave into an arch. At that time the mountain was called Songliang, which was then changed to Tianmen meaning sacred.

It is 131.5 meters high, 57 meters wide and 60 meters deep. It is located close to Zhangjiajie city in western Hunan Province, China and is part of Wulingyuan Scenic Area - a UNESCO World Heritage Site.

One has to climb 999 steps to reach the top.

The whole area is very scenic and was not easily accessible. However Tianmen Mountain Cableway - reportedly the longest passenger cableway in the World with a length of 7200 meters and a height gap of 1277 meters, now brings thousands of tourists to this natural wonder.
 One has to climb 999 steps to reach the 상단, 맨 위로
One has to climb 999 steps to reach the top
 STUNT 의해 U.S.S.R JET FIGHTERS
STUNT BY U.S.S.R JET FIGHTERS
 Glass path(4,700ft above sea level)
Glass path(4,700ft above sea level)
 Tianmen Mountain Cableway
Tianmen Mountain Cableway
1.You jinx 3 people and they Owe 당신 3 cans of your 가장 좋아하는 soda.
2. 당신 find a four leaf clover

3. 당신 are randomly exactly at the end of a rainbow.

4. 당신 get over your phobia

5. Your crush says I 사랑 you.

6. 당신 find $10 dollars on the ground

7. 15 people say your awesome

8. 100 더 많이 people followed 당신 on twitter

9. 당신 meet your fav celebrity.

10. 당신 get a new car.



Yep! 10 things that show 당신 have bad luck is coming soon!




10 things that show 당신 have bad luck is coming soon!
A comedic spin on pop culture 뱀파이어 and scary 영화 in general, tells the story of three teens who believe their new babysitter is a real bloodsucking creature of the night -- and it's now up to them to rid their sleepy little town of the menace.

I 사랑 this show, and for the parent freaking out over it being "inappropriate" they have a time on 디즈니 channel for kids it goes to noon. Shouldn't be that hard to avoid a show that airs late, and its not obscene, and she wasn't "making out" with anyone It was a peck like everything else on Disney. Do yourself a favor and switch to Disney.

Anyway I 사랑 this show! So no I guess its not only children that watch the 디즈니 channel. I 사랑 the characters. It's interesting and funny, I 사랑 that its not a typical 디즈니 comedy and I 사랑 that there's no annoying laughter in the background! Anyway I recommend it :)
I just made some up and put them all here-some are negative, positive and 인용구 and sayings and others.

1. This is me. This is who I am. If 당신 don’t like me-don’t stick around.
2. Challenge me. It will make no difference. Why? ‘Cause 당신 are the one thats going to be dead in the end.
3. 당신 think make-up and fashion is the solution to all your problems? Well thats a big laugh.
4. Beautiful doesn’t mean blonde 또는 skinny
5. Beauty comes from within-not from looks
6. Just because he/she is cute, doesn't mean they are made of 캔디
7. 당신 can do anything-but not everything
8. 당신 may be physically...
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Use these on your friends. They are fun and awesome. Just like me :)))))))))

F = Friend M = Me

F = Do I need to lock the door?
M = Do I need to tell 당신 a hundred times that were not going to have a zombie attack?

Robber = Wheres the money?
Me = In your mouth where your last girlfriend told 당신 to put it.

F = How do I swim?
M = Just don't drown.

M = If 당신 die, I call getting ALL of your awards for being a smart-alex.

The 인기 girl = Your so stupid!
Me = At least I'm not wearing my 셔츠 on backwards.

Your friend is telling a long story. If 당신 are getting annoyed say this.
Friend = Blah blah blah blah......
Me = I need some asprin

Some 랜덤 guy/girl = Is this 좌석 empty?
당신 = Yes and this one will be too if 당신 sit here.

I'll write 더 많이 soon!!!
 Emmanuel 레이 as Ravu, the silent assassin in Dumar movie. 사진 courtesy 과일 District Films.
Emmanuel Ray as Ravu, the silent assassin in Dumar movie. Photo courtesy Fruit District Films.
On 2nd May 2012, Emmanuel 레이 will attend the Pre Cannes Film Social at Jewel Covent Garden hosted 의해 actress and producer Paola Berta at Sheepish Productions and Beverly Hills UK Film Society and Events.

The purpose of the event is to create a public relations and development platform for filmmakers and artists that are keen and ambitious about taking their projects to a consistent level of recognition and
publicity. Some of the film trailers being screened on the night have been selected for Cannes Film Festival 2012.

“I never miss an event hosted 의해 Paola Berta. It was at the Pre Cannes...
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posted by tokidoki123
[Family Guy] S01E05 - A Hero Sits 다음 Door #178
Lois: Meg, you're a sweet, beautiful girl, he'll come around.
Meg: That's such a mom answer.
Lois: Well, have 당신 tried showing him the goods? How's that for a mom answer?
Meg: Creepy.
Contributed 의해 funnytvquotes.com



[Family Guy] S03E07 - Lethal Weapons #183
Peter: Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like 당신 - very homosexually.
Contributed 의해 funnytvquotes.com



[Family Guy] S03E10 - 물고기 Out Of Water #181
Auctioner: We'll open this auction with this pair of panties confiscated from a prostitute.
Quagemire: Fifty...
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Hi my name is Amanda and this is how to service 7th grade. On the first 일 of 7th grade I was so excited to see my 프렌즈 after summer yay. Well the first 일 of 7th grade really sucked but at least I got to see my friends. Yes it’s time to leave school. But I did not see one of my 프렌즈 Hannah that sucks because she went to Luray middle. Well I’m 집 and I just talked to Hannah on the phone. She said “I might come back to page 다음 semester”. “Sweet school is so different without one of my best friends” I said. “If I don’t come back don’t be mad at me”. “I won’t...
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posted by Usui--takumi
EMOTICONS Happy‏
^o^ ☺ ☻ ت ヅ ^.^ ツ ッ シ Ü ≧◡≦ ᵔᴥᵔ ^^ (°⌣°)
٩(^‿^)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃•̃) ◕‿◕ ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ ٩(-̮̮̃-̃)۶ ٩(͡๏̮͡๏)۶ =^.^=
(•‿•) ó‿ó ¢‿¢ ٩◔‿◔۶ ಠ◡ಠ ༺‿༻ (^L^)
♥‿♥ ◙‿◙ ●‿● ^( '‿' )^ ^‿^ ❀‿❀ 乂◜◬◝乂
{◕ ◡ ◕} (。◕‿◕。) ┌( ಠ‿ಠ)┘ ◃┆◉◡◉┆▷ (▰˘◡˘▰)
< (^^,) > q(❂‿❂)p <【☯】‿【☯】> |◔◡◉| ⊂◉‿◉つ
✌.ʕʘ‿ʘʔ.✌ ۹⌤_⌤۹ ⎝⎲⏝⏝⎲⎠ ⎝⓿⏝⓿⎠ ⎝⏠⏝⏠⎠
⎝ᄽ⏝⏠⎠...
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France
Honhonhon! Bonjour English man! Grow a real dick and don't fuck with Peter Pan! I'm Francis Bonnefoy and everyone loves me! 당신 call me a wanker, cause mine is the biggest! Fuck off with your kid brother, cause USUK surely hits it!

Britain
SHUT UP! 당신 DAMN FROG FACE! The fact that your on the same continent is a disgrace! All 당신 are is a bloody wanker, my rhymes hit hard, like Captain Hook's anchor! Your just a bloody whore, I can't stand your face no more, your such a prick! Even Sealand has 더 많이 dick! I have an army of Red Coats! 당신 have shitty little boats! Waiting till the last minute?...
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posted by adaug
Mom:Okay kids!(4 kids)get in here!I got news!
Kennedy:What is it?
Mom:Me and your dad are going on a date
*grasshopper sound*
Mom:so 당신 guy will need a babysitter!


*10 분 later the baby sitter came*
Mom:Hello!I'm Amy!
Babysitter:I'm Ashley!
Mom:DARELL!Get your butt in here!
*Mom and Dad leave*
Ashley:Hi kids!I'm your babysitter Ashley!
kids:HI!
Kid:I'm Amber!I'm four!
Ashley:Hi Amber!*ruffles hair*cute!
Amber:Never...touch...ME!!!
Ashley:OH kay!
Kid:I'm Zack!I'm 9
Ashley:Hello!


*59 분 later*
Amber:I wuv 차 parties!!
Ashley*Walks in*Hey Amber what are 당신 doing?
Amber:Having a 차 party!
Ashley:Can I...
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NAME: Greg Bulmash

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company's President 또는 Vice President. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a 년 plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I'm worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING:...
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(there is no order)

1.Allen walker (d grey man)
2.Gaara (naruto/shippuden
3.Hatsuharu sohma (fruits basket)
4.Deidara (naruto shippuden)
5.Senri shiki (vampire knight)
6.Tsubasa otori (beyblade/metal masters)
7.Toushiro hitsugaya (bleach the movie)
8.Neji hyuga (naruto/shippuden)
9.Mystel (beyblade g revolution)
10.zelgardis breywords (the slayers)
11.hikaru (ouran highschool host club)
12.china (hetalia) (i think?)
13.hanabusa (vampire knight)
14.takama ichijo (vampire knight)
15.zaku (naruto) (deceased aka dead)
posted by pollydbookworm
This 오리 walks into a convenience store and asks the clerk, "Do 당신 have any grapes?" The clerk says no, and the 오리 leaves.

The 다음 day, the 오리 returns and asks, "Do 당신 have any grapes?" The clerk again says no, and the 오리 leaves.

The 일 after that, the 오리 walks in the store again and asks "Do 당신 have any grapes?" The clerk screams at the duck, "You've come in here the past two days and asked if we had any grapes. I told 당신 no every time that we don't have any grapes! I swear if 당신 come back in here again, and ask for grapes, I'll nail your webbed feet to the floor!!"

The duck...
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1. Every 일 at school is the same
2. 당신 never know if your braids look digusting 또는 not
3. 당신 are so used to never talking that if somebody says something to you, never know how to react
4. 당신 would like to think that people notice 또는 even think about 당신 but 당신 are really just the big ugly quiet black girl nobody knows 또는 cares about
5. 당신 worry people will write nasty 코멘트 on your 팬팝 기사 that is obvioustly meant to vent your feeling out
6. On the weekend all 당신 do is watch tv and sleep and play with your cat
7. When 당신 only really have like 3 프렌즈 at school and 2 of them...
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