Oh man, I am now realizing what a horrible mistake I’ve made with all this. But I already bought the games, so I have to do it now. Reminder that I spent literally $100 on bad games this year. This website does not pay me for 글쓰기 기사 and all of this is out of passion for criticism and writing. I am actually doing this to myself. I should probably call the suicide hotline cause I’m pretty sure this counts as a form of self harm. Well, regardless, it’s 크리스마스 time, and what better way to celebrate the holiday season than 의해 talking about something we all get: Crappy video games. We’ve all been there, grandma coming to 당신 with a gift after 당신 asked for Rock Band and she got 당신 Rock Revolution instead at the dollar store. So I decided to go onto Metacritic and look up the lowest rated games ever made in a specific order. Do know that these aren’t all the games. There are about fifty of them, and I do plan on doing this again 다음 년 because I hate myself, so I just got what I could while also leaving some surprises for 다음 year. So with the introductions out of the way, let us start with our first game.
일 1: Game Party
Oh god, Game Party, a game that 당신 can find a million copies at in the pre owned section at Gamestop and bargain bins all over the country. When 당신 think of 닌텐도 Wii shovelware, this is the reigning champion of them all. This is the game most people point to when they think of shovelware on the 닌텐도 Wii. Game Party was created 의해 Midway, the company that made the Mortal Kombat series- Yeah, really. Well, it was actually published 의해 Midway. The studio that developed it was FarSight Studios, mostly known for making pinball games, and is a studio that is still going strong to this day, making pinball games for the Oculus Rift. I find it hilarious that a studio like FarSight was able to outlive Midway. That’s kinda sad. Game Party is what many consider one of the worst games of all time and being the undisputed king of Wii shovelware, and yet, despite that, it did financially well. It managed to sell over three million copies and got two other sequels that nobody cares about. So what was it that let this game get sold to retirement homes worldwide? Well…. A big fat mess.
From the start of the game, I can already tell this is a rough one. The theme is this really bland single beat that loops every five seconds, no joke. It’s even what they have on the Wii menu screen. The graphics look unappealing too. Every character model looks like a melted plastic doll. There are a lot of characters to play as, but they all look so similar that I can barely tell the difference, so I just went with a blue haired girl with headphones because of course I would. 당신 have an assortment of seven games. Air hockey, hoops, darts, shuffleboard, ski ball, 맥주 pong (Which is not what it’s called in the game), and trivia. Air hockey has this really sickening feel to it. Every time I try to knock the puck into my opponents goal, I end up knocking the puck behind me and into my own goal. I found it much easier to just keep my hand outstretched so the puck would knock back and eventually land in the other players goal, but air hockey felt like it was dragging on for far too long, and the winning score is 7. Hoops is a real mess. Every time I try to aim the 농구 to throw in the hoop, it would spin around in the hoop and then fall off. I found it 더 많이 easy (And mildly entertaining) To just chuck the 농구 like a madman and watch those suckers fly. At least it got a chuckle out of me. Darts doesn’t seem to have the dart go where I want. I aim the cursor at the center to get a bullseye and the thing flies off to the left. This is also where I notice the horrible angle of the game, as the way the camera is aimed doesn’t help to show how much force 당신 need to hit the board. I will throw it lightly because I think I’m close and want to hit one of the lower parts and instead, I end up dropping the dart completely onto the floor. Shuffleboard sucks, obviously. It either slides way too far and falls off 또는 당신 didn’t slide it enough and it doesn’t get 당신 a point. Even if 당신 do get close to it, the opponent will just knock your puck off and leave 당신 with no points. Ski ball is a goddamn mess and was probably the worst one of the bunch for me. Every time I 그네, 스윙 the remote to hit the hole, my character would not let go of the damn ball. It was also here that my wrist started to hurt from the asinine motion controls the game expected 당신 to use and I was only playing the game for twenty minutes. Next, 맥주 pong and I take back what I said about ski ball. 맥주 pong is the absolute worst. Take the problems I had with ski ball and amplify it. My character would not let go of the damn ball and when I finally got to throw it, the ball would never hit the target, even when I clearly saw it. 또는 did it? I can’t tell, the ball is always floating around the cups so I can’t tell if I hit it 또는 if I didn’t. Finally, trivia. Well… it’s trivia. It’s as average as 당신 could get. The most basic form of trivia, but trivia nonetheless. I also noticed at this point that 당신 get tickets for beating the games and getting a high score. The highest score in something like darts was 10 and I got like 200. They didn’t even try. So what are the tickets for? 당신 can unlock 더 많이 characters, 더 많이 levels and tables. Well, at least I can add to the insane roster of characters. 옮기기 over Smash Ultimate, Game Party has the biggest character roster ever. So at least 당신 get something for your troubles, but… boy do I not care.
Well, that’s one game down. Game Party is a dull mess, and I wouldn’t subject your 프렌즈 to it. Even after thirty 분 of playing it, I saw everything I needed to. But I did take notice of a special feature in the games option menu. Apparently, Midway also published a game called Cruis’n, which is another one of the lowest rated games on Metacritic. And let me spoil it for you, no, Cruis’n is not going to be reviewed this year. 다음 time. So yeah, that was painful… But trust me, gang. We’re just getting started. So… pray for me.
일 1: Game Party
Oh god, Game Party, a game that 당신 can find a million copies at in the pre owned section at Gamestop and bargain bins all over the country. When 당신 think of 닌텐도 Wii shovelware, this is the reigning champion of them all. This is the game most people point to when they think of shovelware on the 닌텐도 Wii. Game Party was created 의해 Midway, the company that made the Mortal Kombat series- Yeah, really. Well, it was actually published 의해 Midway. The studio that developed it was FarSight Studios, mostly known for making pinball games, and is a studio that is still going strong to this day, making pinball games for the Oculus Rift. I find it hilarious that a studio like FarSight was able to outlive Midway. That’s kinda sad. Game Party is what many consider one of the worst games of all time and being the undisputed king of Wii shovelware, and yet, despite that, it did financially well. It managed to sell over three million copies and got two other sequels that nobody cares about. So what was it that let this game get sold to retirement homes worldwide? Well…. A big fat mess.
From the start of the game, I can already tell this is a rough one. The theme is this really bland single beat that loops every five seconds, no joke. It’s even what they have on the Wii menu screen. The graphics look unappealing too. Every character model looks like a melted plastic doll. There are a lot of characters to play as, but they all look so similar that I can barely tell the difference, so I just went with a blue haired girl with headphones because of course I would. 당신 have an assortment of seven games. Air hockey, hoops, darts, shuffleboard, ski ball, 맥주 pong (Which is not what it’s called in the game), and trivia. Air hockey has this really sickening feel to it. Every time I try to knock the puck into my opponents goal, I end up knocking the puck behind me and into my own goal. I found it much easier to just keep my hand outstretched so the puck would knock back and eventually land in the other players goal, but air hockey felt like it was dragging on for far too long, and the winning score is 7. Hoops is a real mess. Every time I try to aim the 농구 to throw in the hoop, it would spin around in the hoop and then fall off. I found it 더 많이 easy (And mildly entertaining) To just chuck the 농구 like a madman and watch those suckers fly. At least it got a chuckle out of me. Darts doesn’t seem to have the dart go where I want. I aim the cursor at the center to get a bullseye and the thing flies off to the left. This is also where I notice the horrible angle of the game, as the way the camera is aimed doesn’t help to show how much force 당신 need to hit the board. I will throw it lightly because I think I’m close and want to hit one of the lower parts and instead, I end up dropping the dart completely onto the floor. Shuffleboard sucks, obviously. It either slides way too far and falls off 또는 당신 didn’t slide it enough and it doesn’t get 당신 a point. Even if 당신 do get close to it, the opponent will just knock your puck off and leave 당신 with no points. Ski ball is a goddamn mess and was probably the worst one of the bunch for me. Every time I 그네, 스윙 the remote to hit the hole, my character would not let go of the damn ball. It was also here that my wrist started to hurt from the asinine motion controls the game expected 당신 to use and I was only playing the game for twenty minutes. Next, 맥주 pong and I take back what I said about ski ball. 맥주 pong is the absolute worst. Take the problems I had with ski ball and amplify it. My character would not let go of the damn ball and when I finally got to throw it, the ball would never hit the target, even when I clearly saw it. 또는 did it? I can’t tell, the ball is always floating around the cups so I can’t tell if I hit it 또는 if I didn’t. Finally, trivia. Well… it’s trivia. It’s as average as 당신 could get. The most basic form of trivia, but trivia nonetheless. I also noticed at this point that 당신 get tickets for beating the games and getting a high score. The highest score in something like darts was 10 and I got like 200. They didn’t even try. So what are the tickets for? 당신 can unlock 더 많이 characters, 더 많이 levels and tables. Well, at least I can add to the insane roster of characters. 옮기기 over Smash Ultimate, Game Party has the biggest character roster ever. So at least 당신 get something for your troubles, but… boy do I not care.
Well, that’s one game down. Game Party is a dull mess, and I wouldn’t subject your 프렌즈 to it. Even after thirty 분 of playing it, I saw everything I needed to. But I did take notice of a special feature in the games option menu. Apparently, Midway also published a game called Cruis’n, which is another one of the lowest rated games on Metacritic. And let me spoil it for you, no, Cruis’n is not going to be reviewed this year. 다음 time. So yeah, that was painful… But trust me, gang. We’re just getting started. So… pray for me.
