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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my list of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let 당신 know now i got alot of these from the 유튜브 channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything 또는 eating anything 당신 might spit it 또는 something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the 비, 빗자루 late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the 만, 베이 they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's 가장 좋아하는 vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the 버섯 have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do 당신 call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do 당신 call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do 당신 make an octopus giggle ten times?
당신 give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do 당신 make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's 가장 좋아하는 composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between 당신 and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't 당신 hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the 토마토 blush?
It saw the 샐러드 dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do 당신 know if it's raining 고양이 and dogs?
당신 step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do 당신 know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do 당신 get 피카츄 on a bus?
당신 포켓몬스터 (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't 당신 dress with 피카츄 in the room?
He'll 피카츄 (peek at you)

#27 What do 당신 call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
당신 boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton 십자가, 크로스 the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do 당신 call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's 담홍색, 핑크 and fluffy?
담홍색, 핑크 fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
담홍색, 핑크 fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when 당신 drink 7 coca colas?
당신 burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the 물고기 say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't 당신 trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope 당신 liked them. Make sure 당신 check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
posted by jessicamc26
A stoner called the 불, 화재 department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"






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posted by sapherequeen
 :)
:)
I just want to take the time to thank everyone here who has known me, been on my side, is a 팬 of me, cares about me, etc. :)

I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D

I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on 팬팝 towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)

I am me again. I 사랑 and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of 당신 for the rest of my life :)

I 사랑 당신 all! Have a beautiful, wonderful 일 :D
 -LOL!-
-LOL!-
posted by KatiiCullen94
dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that 당신 were real, that 당신 all were , that he was.
There is evidence that 당신 were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming 또는 not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and 당신 diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, 또는 did i make 당신 up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without 당신 i dont know. But i want to find out. Do 당신 think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for...
continue reading...
posted by twilight0girl
link

Nathan:
Dear Marni,
I am so sorry.
Can 당신 forgive me for this?

Rotti:
Not the debt doctor
With the hungry scalpel!
Here's my prognosis:
Will they live...?

Hench Girls:
Doubtful.

Luigi:
Your the 거리 physician
carving flesh sculptures!

Pavi:
Paint your 나귀, 엉덩이 like rembrandt!
Ha! 당신 Like-a that?!

Rotti:
Better start praying when 당신 see him coming.

Luigi:
cause tonight its curtains!

Luigi, Pavi and Rotti:
Youre the night surgeon!

Chorus:
Remember who 당신 are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember what 당신 did to Marni.

Chorus:
Remember who 당신 are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember...
continue reading...
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