I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING. ALL CREDIT GOES TO CHESS_BOXING ON LIVEJOURNAL. I AM SIMPLY SHARING THE STORY. I WROTE NONE OF THIS
I started awake to the sound of a siren. I've only been woken 의해 sirens on a handful occasions, none of them pleasant. This wasn't actually the worst of them; my sleep had been fretful and filled with awful dreams, and I'd repeatedly jerked upright during the night, only to curl back into a freezing, quivering ball beneath the scratchy synthetic bedclothes. After a night of such distress, I quite welcomed the coming of morning. Even if it was six o'clock, and time for the prison's morning exercises in the yard.
The prison was stirring around me, a symphony of strained yawns, clanging bars, wailing sirens and the yelling of the guards growing in pitch. The light came from the neon strips in the main hall, and I could see through the window that it was still dark. Which made sense, considering it was autumn. In the new light, I could take in my surroundings 더 많이 thoroughly.
The cell was approximately four metres wide and six long, with one of the shorter walls made entirely of bars. The bunk 침대 was against one side, at the back, so my head was as far away from the door as possible. Suited me fine. In one corner was a cupboard, and in another a chair and desk. The rest was empty. The cells were arranged so that they all faced inwards to the rectangular central hall, across several floors, which were all connected 의해 metal walkways and staircases. This gave the impression that, from the right angle, anyone from any cell could be watching you. I sighed sadly (drama queen) and was about to turn away to crawl out of 침대 and into hell when my gaze was suddenly and alarmingly interrupted 의해 something rushing toward my face.
One moment I was opposite a concrete wall, the 다음 I was opposite a pointy, scruffy face which was staring straight back, its bright blue eyes filled with a restless, inquisitive quality. Perhaps it was how they never stopped moving. Regardless, it was disconcerting as all hell. I backed off. He tilted his head to one side. I copied him. He reached out - I resisted flinching - and poked me experimentally in the chest. I gave him my most disapproving, authoritative glare.
He snorted with laughter.
'Get up, 당신 silly twat.'
Fantastic, I feel completely emasculated and it's not even three 분 past six.
I clambered down from my bunk - Jesus, it was cold - and took the opportunity to observe Matt while he stretched out and pulled his training shoes on. As I'd guessed last night, he was thin and small and sharp. I couldn't tell how thin; the baggy overalls hung from his frame. His hair was a complete dark mess, sticking on end at all angles and giving his appearance an air of delicate chaos. As I watched him tie his laces, I noted with curiosity the manner in which his fingers moved. They were aggressive in the most graceful sense; swiftly attacking, prodding and poking the shoelaces into place, his dark brow furrowed over the darting blue of his eyes as though he could will the 레이스 into position through concentration alone.
In short, he was absolutely fucking divine.
On the other hand, the crazed psychopath hypothesis was looking 더 많이 and 더 많이 viable 의해 the minute.
Now, I know your first 일 in prison is never supposed to be a laugh, but this was quite possibly becoming the worst of them all, I mused, as I wordlessly followed Matt out of the cell when the gate was released. I'd known my sexuality was flexible since I was fifteen 또는 sixteen, and it really wasn't an issue. I didn't have any sob stories where my family disowned me 또는 my 프렌즈 rejected me, because everyone I knew had no issue with the fact whatsoever. Okay, so a few people had issues and I'd just had to avoid them. But it had never been a problem before - never something to hide 또는 to fear. In prison, however, I just... I didn't want to stand on the walkways and shout it at the 상단, 맨 위로 of my lungs, 당신 know? Call my fears unfounded if 당신 like - I'm sure there are some lovely people in prison - but every fibre of my being screamed that that would be a Terrible Plan. And now Matt. I stayed close behind him in the throng of grey uniforms as we all shuffled outside and into the courtyard.
I'm not even saying that I was attracted to him but I suppose there had been a moment there, a flicker, a thought, a breath, where I had considered the possibility that maybe, maybe, yes. And that was enough to worry me. I hadn't even considered a plan concerning my sexuality in prison. It genuinely hadn't crossed my mind, and suddenly I felt vulnerable and anxious and I began chewing at the inside of my cheek. I couldn't go about developing even the mildest of crushes on those around me here. Not unless I kept it really. Fucking. Secret. And I'm not great with secret. I'm almost eighty percent sure I talk in my sleep sometimes. What about the showers? The 샤워 thing, where 당신 all wash together, is that true? That can't be true. Can it? Oh, Jesus, I bet it's true. I'm just going to curl up and die. Might as well call it a 일 now. I've had a good innings, I suppose. Why, in caveman times, I'd be an ancient and wise prophet of the tribe, having over twenty years under my belt! They'd be 글쓰기 songs about Dominic the-
'Stand behind me, just kind of... copy,' a hiss came from beside me, and Matt took a couple of steps forward. We were all standing in a grid now, with me directly behind him. I ran a hand worriedly through my blonde hair and focused my energy on watching his movements without... watching his movements.
The routine was simple. Steps and jumps and stretches and every Physical Education warm-up I'd ever loathed. When the whole twenty 분 were over, we filed out and into a separate yard. People 스플릿, 분할 off into bizarre little social groups. I was left standing with Matt, awkwardly overlooking the scene. He scratched absentmindedly behind his ear, fingers tangling in the soft brown spikes of hair. I didn't notice. I definitely didn't notice.
I wished I hadn't noticed the first time I noticed him. As soon as one notices something, one can't help but constantly notice it.
God.
'Breakfast?' He stood in front of me, a crooked smile flickering over his face. I nodded. I needed a good cup of tea. Yes. A good cup of 차 would put things right.
I started awake to the sound of a siren. I've only been woken 의해 sirens on a handful occasions, none of them pleasant. This wasn't actually the worst of them; my sleep had been fretful and filled with awful dreams, and I'd repeatedly jerked upright during the night, only to curl back into a freezing, quivering ball beneath the scratchy synthetic bedclothes. After a night of such distress, I quite welcomed the coming of morning. Even if it was six o'clock, and time for the prison's morning exercises in the yard.
The prison was stirring around me, a symphony of strained yawns, clanging bars, wailing sirens and the yelling of the guards growing in pitch. The light came from the neon strips in the main hall, and I could see through the window that it was still dark. Which made sense, considering it was autumn. In the new light, I could take in my surroundings 더 많이 thoroughly.
The cell was approximately four metres wide and six long, with one of the shorter walls made entirely of bars. The bunk 침대 was against one side, at the back, so my head was as far away from the door as possible. Suited me fine. In one corner was a cupboard, and in another a chair and desk. The rest was empty. The cells were arranged so that they all faced inwards to the rectangular central hall, across several floors, which were all connected 의해 metal walkways and staircases. This gave the impression that, from the right angle, anyone from any cell could be watching you. I sighed sadly (drama queen) and was about to turn away to crawl out of 침대 and into hell when my gaze was suddenly and alarmingly interrupted 의해 something rushing toward my face.
One moment I was opposite a concrete wall, the 다음 I was opposite a pointy, scruffy face which was staring straight back, its bright blue eyes filled with a restless, inquisitive quality. Perhaps it was how they never stopped moving. Regardless, it was disconcerting as all hell. I backed off. He tilted his head to one side. I copied him. He reached out - I resisted flinching - and poked me experimentally in the chest. I gave him my most disapproving, authoritative glare.
He snorted with laughter.
'Get up, 당신 silly twat.'
Fantastic, I feel completely emasculated and it's not even three 분 past six.
I clambered down from my bunk - Jesus, it was cold - and took the opportunity to observe Matt while he stretched out and pulled his training shoes on. As I'd guessed last night, he was thin and small and sharp. I couldn't tell how thin; the baggy overalls hung from his frame. His hair was a complete dark mess, sticking on end at all angles and giving his appearance an air of delicate chaos. As I watched him tie his laces, I noted with curiosity the manner in which his fingers moved. They were aggressive in the most graceful sense; swiftly attacking, prodding and poking the shoelaces into place, his dark brow furrowed over the darting blue of his eyes as though he could will the 레이스 into position through concentration alone.
In short, he was absolutely fucking divine.
On the other hand, the crazed psychopath hypothesis was looking 더 많이 and 더 많이 viable 의해 the minute.
Now, I know your first 일 in prison is never supposed to be a laugh, but this was quite possibly becoming the worst of them all, I mused, as I wordlessly followed Matt out of the cell when the gate was released. I'd known my sexuality was flexible since I was fifteen 또는 sixteen, and it really wasn't an issue. I didn't have any sob stories where my family disowned me 또는 my 프렌즈 rejected me, because everyone I knew had no issue with the fact whatsoever. Okay, so a few people had issues and I'd just had to avoid them. But it had never been a problem before - never something to hide 또는 to fear. In prison, however, I just... I didn't want to stand on the walkways and shout it at the 상단, 맨 위로 of my lungs, 당신 know? Call my fears unfounded if 당신 like - I'm sure there are some lovely people in prison - but every fibre of my being screamed that that would be a Terrible Plan. And now Matt. I stayed close behind him in the throng of grey uniforms as we all shuffled outside and into the courtyard.
I'm not even saying that I was attracted to him but I suppose there had been a moment there, a flicker, a thought, a breath, where I had considered the possibility that maybe, maybe, yes. And that was enough to worry me. I hadn't even considered a plan concerning my sexuality in prison. It genuinely hadn't crossed my mind, and suddenly I felt vulnerable and anxious and I began chewing at the inside of my cheek. I couldn't go about developing even the mildest of crushes on those around me here. Not unless I kept it really. Fucking. Secret. And I'm not great with secret. I'm almost eighty percent sure I talk in my sleep sometimes. What about the showers? The 샤워 thing, where 당신 all wash together, is that true? That can't be true. Can it? Oh, Jesus, I bet it's true. I'm just going to curl up and die. Might as well call it a 일 now. I've had a good innings, I suppose. Why, in caveman times, I'd be an ancient and wise prophet of the tribe, having over twenty years under my belt! They'd be 글쓰기 songs about Dominic the-
'Stand behind me, just kind of... copy,' a hiss came from beside me, and Matt took a couple of steps forward. We were all standing in a grid now, with me directly behind him. I ran a hand worriedly through my blonde hair and focused my energy on watching his movements without... watching his movements.
The routine was simple. Steps and jumps and stretches and every Physical Education warm-up I'd ever loathed. When the whole twenty 분 were over, we filed out and into a separate yard. People 스플릿, 분할 off into bizarre little social groups. I was left standing with Matt, awkwardly overlooking the scene. He scratched absentmindedly behind his ear, fingers tangling in the soft brown spikes of hair. I didn't notice. I definitely didn't notice.
I wished I hadn't noticed the first time I noticed him. As soon as one notices something, one can't help but constantly notice it.
God.
'Breakfast?' He stood in front of me, a crooked smile flickering over his face. I nodded. I needed a good cup of tea. Yes. A good cup of 차 would put things right.
