I found these on Tumblr ... thought they were funny (and pretty damn accurate).
This is a little graphic for those of 당신 who shy away from this kinda stuff ;)
1. Bella is clumsy, shy and constantly bites her lower lip when she’s nervous
2. Edward finds her lip biting habits sexy
3. Edward is jealous, over protective and a bit controlling
4. Edward has a temper
5. Though there are no 뱀파이어 and no werewolves, Human Edward can actually GROWL
6. Edward has the greenest eyes she’s ever seen and a panty dropping crooked smile
7. Edward always has velvety smooth, warm voice that turns to rough when he wants Bella
8. Bella has the deepest brown eyes and he can see to her soul through them
9. Edward has a monster cock that deserves an award and can put any other to shame ;)
10. Though some might think physically impossible, Edward can get hard in less than 3 초 after seeing Bella only bite her lip
11. Tanya is a bitch
12. Rose is the coolest badass ever
13. Esme is always wiping tears from her eyes somewhere
14. Carlisle the kindest and most compassionate Doctor ever… unless you’re 읽기 a SAVAGE story [Lorabell note: 또는 Emancipation Proclamation where he’s a straight up badass]
15. Unless it’s a sex marathon story 또는 a Dadward/Momella story, you’re gonna have to wait till they say “I 사랑 you” before sex
16. Edward always gets Bella to come only 2 초 before him and both always happen explosively with white spots behind their eyelids
17. Alice is referred to as a pixie, loves Bella 바비 인형 and always takes her shopping against her will
18. No matter how long the story is 또는 what genre but you’ll ALWAYS find Edward in a towel somewhere with Bella there to drool over the V between his hips
19. Bella hates wearing heels, calls them “death traps” and they’re usually forced on her 의해 Alice 또는 Rose
20. Edward has LONG fingers that can do wonders with 음악 and Bella’s [*cough* and Lorabell’s *cough*] lady bits
21. Charlie is always always always fishing… I mean, dude get a life - no one fishes 24/7 not even in Canon
22. Jacob is bad. If he’s not bad, he’s gay. If he’s not gay, he’s a dog. Literally.
23. Mike is a douche. No matter what he does and how nice he is, he’s always a douche with a small dick
24. EVERY TIME Bella and Edward have sex, it’s better than the last and the best sex they have ever had. EVER.
25. Jake almost ALWAYS ends up with Leah
26. Rosalie always smacks Emmet on the back of his head… if she’s not around then it’s Esme
27. They always rip condoms with their teeth
28. At one time 또는 another you’ll find that “she/he saw something unreadable flicker in his/her eyes but it disappeared before she/he could see what it was”
29. The author will almost always sneak in at least one book 또는 movie quote
30. When most normal people would have reached for the telephone and dialed 911, Bella is NOT freaked out 의해 Edward watching her sleep
This is a little graphic for those of 당신 who shy away from this kinda stuff ;)
1. Bella is clumsy, shy and constantly bites her lower lip when she’s nervous
2. Edward finds her lip biting habits sexy
3. Edward is jealous, over protective and a bit controlling
4. Edward has a temper
5. Though there are no 뱀파이어 and no werewolves, Human Edward can actually GROWL
6. Edward has the greenest eyes she’s ever seen and a panty dropping crooked smile
7. Edward always has velvety smooth, warm voice that turns to rough when he wants Bella
8. Bella has the deepest brown eyes and he can see to her soul through them
9. Edward has a monster cock that deserves an award and can put any other to shame ;)
10. Though some might think physically impossible, Edward can get hard in less than 3 초 after seeing Bella only bite her lip
11. Tanya is a bitch
12. Rose is the coolest badass ever
13. Esme is always wiping tears from her eyes somewhere
14. Carlisle the kindest and most compassionate Doctor ever… unless you’re 읽기 a SAVAGE story [Lorabell note: 또는 Emancipation Proclamation where he’s a straight up badass]
15. Unless it’s a sex marathon story 또는 a Dadward/Momella story, you’re gonna have to wait till they say “I 사랑 you” before sex
16. Edward always gets Bella to come only 2 초 before him and both always happen explosively with white spots behind their eyelids
17. Alice is referred to as a pixie, loves Bella 바비 인형 and always takes her shopping against her will
18. No matter how long the story is 또는 what genre but you’ll ALWAYS find Edward in a towel somewhere with Bella there to drool over the V between his hips
19. Bella hates wearing heels, calls them “death traps” and they’re usually forced on her 의해 Alice 또는 Rose
20. Edward has LONG fingers that can do wonders with 음악 and Bella’s [*cough* and Lorabell’s *cough*] lady bits
21. Charlie is always always always fishing… I mean, dude get a life - no one fishes 24/7 not even in Canon
22. Jacob is bad. If he’s not bad, he’s gay. If he’s not gay, he’s a dog. Literally.
23. Mike is a douche. No matter what he does and how nice he is, he’s always a douche with a small dick
24. EVERY TIME Bella and Edward have sex, it’s better than the last and the best sex they have ever had. EVER.
25. Jake almost ALWAYS ends up with Leah
26. Rosalie always smacks Emmet on the back of his head… if she’s not around then it’s Esme
27. They always rip condoms with their teeth
28. At one time 또는 another you’ll find that “she/he saw something unreadable flicker in his/her eyes but it disappeared before she/he could see what it was”
29. The author will almost always sneak in at least one book 또는 movie quote
30. When most normal people would have reached for the telephone and dialed 911, Bella is NOT freaked out 의해 Edward watching her sleep
Renesme's POV
After hours of weeping, I stopped walked over to my dresser and threw a maroon 재킷, 자 켓 on, I then put my hair up with a rubber-band knowing it would hurt my hair later. I was going to sneak out, I slipped on some 컨버스 and made some recordings on my laptop, So if mom 또는 dad try to come in I would have something recorded. I had 5 recordings set. 1: "No thanks" 2:Go away!" 3: I dont want to talk right now sorry" 4: Im not hungry. 5:I'm tired, I'm gonna go to bed. It was pretty corny but eh what else can I do? I thought. When i was all done I slipped out my window and jumped to the ground. When I was sure no one was watching I dashed off in the direction of Alice's house.
After hours of weeping, I stopped walked over to my dresser and threw a maroon 재킷, 자 켓 on, I then put my hair up with a rubber-band knowing it would hurt my hair later. I was going to sneak out, I slipped on some 컨버스 and made some recordings on my laptop, So if mom 또는 dad try to come in I would have something recorded. I had 5 recordings set. 1: "No thanks" 2:Go away!" 3: I dont want to talk right now sorry" 4: Im not hungry. 5:I'm tired, I'm gonna go to bed. It was pretty corny but eh what else can I do? I thought. When i was all done I slipped out my window and jumped to the ground. When I was sure no one was watching I dashed off in the direction of Alice's house.
don't 당신 ever wonder what your life would be like if your boyfriend was a vampire? i do every 일 there are a few things that i know for sure:
1. they will never get old.
even when 당신 are thirty they will still look young.
2. they will never cheat on you.
It is to risky for them to cheat on 당신 because 당신 know there big secrete that they are vampires!
3. they will be able to defend 당신 and protect 당신 for ever.
no one could ever touch 당신 또는 hurt 당신 again he could defend 당신 from all danger.
reads 다음 months for the downsides of having a vampire boyfriend.
1. they will never get old.
even when 당신 are thirty they will still look young.
2. they will never cheat on you.
It is to risky for them to cheat on 당신 because 당신 know there big secrete that they are vampires!
3. they will be able to defend 당신 and protect 당신 for ever.
no one could ever touch 당신 또는 hurt 당신 again he could defend 당신 from all danger.
reads 다음 months for the downsides of having a vampire boyfriend.
According to MTV:
“Taylor Lautner and Kristen Stewart are among the first to 확인 that they’ll be attending, making the pair a recurring feature on the red carpet (remember their adorable joint presentation of a “scary movie”-themed feature at last year’s Academy Awards?), and they’ll be in good company with a host of other celebs including Zac Efron, Taylor Swift, Emma Roberts, Leighton Meester, and Mila Kunis. ”
Other 유명인사 tend to walk the red carpet, so be on the lookout for 더 많이 names to be at the show on January 5th. Twilight was up for a ton of awards, expect Taylor and Kristen to pick up a few as well as possibly be presenters.
당신 can also catch live Red Carpet coverage on @Ustream at 4:30pm PT / 7:30pm ET on Jan 5! link