End of Part 17:
Jane’s POV:
I slowed as I entered the carpeted corridor, the sobs ripping from my chest. I wept and I wept, with no tears. If only I could forget, if only I could go on and never think about him. But he was my brother, my twin brother and my best friend.
And now he was gone.
I could see shapes, people moving down the corridor. I heard their feet brushing against the carpet, heard their muted voices rising in agitation and shock as they saw me. I struggled to tune out their voices as they asked me questions. I’d had enough of life lines, had enough of gripping onto straws in the hope they’d save me.
We couldn’t save Alec. All I could do was run, run and run and hope I’d eventually forget 또는 block it out 또는 learn to live with the memory. If I couldn’t…well an eternity doesn’t have to be so long…
Not if 당신 have to power to end it.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Part 22:
Jane’s POV:
The idea struck me like a sudden wave strikes and unprepared surfer: shocking, suffocating, terrifying; but also exactly what I needed. My mind cleared; the agony and longing fading into the background, at least for now. I blinked, seeing again for a moment. I met someone’s gaze; I only paying attention long enough to register that they were worried, confused, scared. Then, though I could still see, I was no longer looking at the pair of dark red eyes staring at me.
“I won’t be returning.” My voice sounded dead, like the words were nothing. I didn’t know why I was telling anyone about my plan; then I realised that I wasn’t telling anyone. I was just saying the words, confirming it for myself. I had to hear them, spoken aloud, before I could truly believe them.
“However,” I added. “It won’t cause any harm, as I’m half-dead already.”
I saw again, my eyes focused on the window at the far end of the corridor. The sun was falling from the sky as I reached it; I stared out for half a 초 before I flung myself – feet first – down to the ground. I landed with a quiet thump on the stone courtyard, bending my knees to absorb the impact.
I was strangely sane now; the depression that consumed me before seemed to have passed. I knew it would return, though, as soon as I thought of Alec 또는 let myself waver from my solid path. The solid path, so long before, which was now nearing its end…
I threw myself into a run again, speeding out of the city and across grassy hills. I didn’t know where I was going, but I knew where I was going to end up: at peace.
But so, so alone…
Or, maybe, he’d be waiting there for me? I hoped so. If I wasn’t, I hoped I wouldn’t have to wait long. If there was something on the other side, and he wasn’t there, wouldn’t that be just as bad as now?
Jane’s POV:
I slowed as I entered the carpeted corridor, the sobs ripping from my chest. I wept and I wept, with no tears. If only I could forget, if only I could go on and never think about him. But he was my brother, my twin brother and my best friend.
And now he was gone.
I could see shapes, people moving down the corridor. I heard their feet brushing against the carpet, heard their muted voices rising in agitation and shock as they saw me. I struggled to tune out their voices as they asked me questions. I’d had enough of life lines, had enough of gripping onto straws in the hope they’d save me.
We couldn’t save Alec. All I could do was run, run and run and hope I’d eventually forget 또는 block it out 또는 learn to live with the memory. If I couldn’t…well an eternity doesn’t have to be so long…
Not if 당신 have to power to end it.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Part 22:
Jane’s POV:
The idea struck me like a sudden wave strikes and unprepared surfer: shocking, suffocating, terrifying; but also exactly what I needed. My mind cleared; the agony and longing fading into the background, at least for now. I blinked, seeing again for a moment. I met someone’s gaze; I only paying attention long enough to register that they were worried, confused, scared. Then, though I could still see, I was no longer looking at the pair of dark red eyes staring at me.
“I won’t be returning.” My voice sounded dead, like the words were nothing. I didn’t know why I was telling anyone about my plan; then I realised that I wasn’t telling anyone. I was just saying the words, confirming it for myself. I had to hear them, spoken aloud, before I could truly believe them.
“However,” I added. “It won’t cause any harm, as I’m half-dead already.”
I saw again, my eyes focused on the window at the far end of the corridor. The sun was falling from the sky as I reached it; I stared out for half a 초 before I flung myself – feet first – down to the ground. I landed with a quiet thump on the stone courtyard, bending my knees to absorb the impact.
I was strangely sane now; the depression that consumed me before seemed to have passed. I knew it would return, though, as soon as I thought of Alec 또는 let myself waver from my solid path. The solid path, so long before, which was now nearing its end…
I threw myself into a run again, speeding out of the city and across grassy hills. I didn’t know where I was going, but I knew where I was going to end up: at peace.
But so, so alone…
Or, maybe, he’d be waiting there for me? I hoped so. If I wasn’t, I hoped I wouldn’t have to wait long. If there was something on the other side, and he wasn’t there, wouldn’t that be just as bad as now?
