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posted by TheRatKing1
( Author's note: the drawing belongs to Lt_Kowalski. I don't own it, but i wish i did, that's how epic it is)

*presses tape recorder button*

"0900 hours....Skipper's Log......

After the recent success of my life's story, I decided to do one for Kowalski. He doesn't know I'm doing this, so try to keep this under wraps, comprende?

I did background checks on all of my boys when they joined the team. I don't suppose i did it thoroughly enough, because there's a whole other side to Private that I-.... right...this is about Kowalski... you'll have to wait and see if i decide to do one for Private.

Rico's past is still shrouded in enough mystery to rival the smog in California, but Kowalski's is as clear as water considering he told me his entire life's story the 일 he joined.


But first, for those of 당신 who don't know him, this is Kowalski:

He's my go-to guy for everything science and scienceish. He's been with us from he very beginning of what 당신 humans know as our adventures right to the very end of our show, and I'm sure he'll be here for a long time after that!....He'd better be, anyways...

He can be a bit arrogant and overconfident, but i still appreciate him. He can build anything out of anything! The man's a genius!...except when his inventions endanger the fate of the universe....again...

Like the time when he built that snow come maker that enveloped EVERYTHING!

Private! Didn't i tell 당신 a hundred thousand times NOT to exaggerate? It only covered New York!

As i was saying... I charge him when he gets TOO boastful about his brains. He's on his 5th Show-Off Jar now, and i have enough quarters to pay every parking meter in the Big Apple.

He can be wacky sometimes and ...TRIES to sound cool sometimes, but it never comes out right. It seems....forced, but he has...issues. He gets too defensive about science and emotions evade him. Not that we'd need them on our team! I don't allow nancy-cats on my elite team!

And yet he and Doris are still dating....

He over analyzes situations, and his plans are usually a few steps 더 많이 than we need, but he's a brilliant bird, an amazing inventor, and i am PROUD to call him my lieutenant and friend.

From what he's told me, he's 24 years old. His parents have Polish blood in them from somewhere in his family tree. he speaks several languages including Russian (which came in handy when the Red 다람쥐 started insulting us in Russian once)He was born in a Florida hatchery. He spent the early years of his life messing around in the veterinary labs. Surgical tools were his first toys, in fact.

He grew up loving science and mathematics and had his fair share of screw ups trying to escape from the zoo he lived in. I forget what it was called now, but they eventually had him transferred to the Bronx Zoo. It was there when he decided he didn't like the life of a Zoo animal and packed his copies of Scientific American and left for the same training academy that eventually Rico would graduate from a few years later.

It was in that 펭귄 Training Academy where an 18 년 old Kowalski became the full-fledged scientist we know today. His first invention, ironically, worked without blowing up, and it still does to this day! it was some sort of teleportation device.

The thing only could 옮기기 당신 a few feet in one direction-....

One Direction? How did 당신 know that was my 가장 좋아하는 band, skipper?

Private....enough with the interruptions! I'm trying to tell these probably -bored-to-bits-with-your-interruptions humans about Kowalski! please...just go and watch TV....sorry to sound like a jerk, but i had enough interruptions with my own biography.

Sorry sir.

당신 ok? No feelings hurt?

None sir.

Anyways... he left the academy and made his way to the Central Park Zoo shortly before our big adventure in Madagascar during them summer of '05.

The rest is history.

God forbid if i ever lose Kowalski like i almost 로스트 Manfredi and Johnson. He's been with me the longest, and probably knows 더 많이 about me than I'd care to admit. In many ways, he's a 메리다와 마법의 숲 bird and a truly great individual, and one of the best 프렌즈 I've ever had the pleasure of knowing.

Kowalski, thanks for everything.
Chapter 9

Skipper raised his sword and shield up, the odds were against him, but he had the power of his mother 의해 his side. Blowhole controlled his monster with his mind, with just a simple thought he could make it do anything he wanted. Blowhole controlled his monster to use its claws to crush Skipper like a bug. Skipper jumped up before being sandwiched 의해 the huge bat claws, but didn't notice one of the claws that came up to strike him down. While Skipper was down, Blowhole put his claws together and started to make a laser and shot at Skipper. Skipper turned himself into mist before he...
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User: Hi! My name is Mort!! :D.

Cleverbot: So M. Was short for 모건 then?

User: No. Do 당신 like King Julien's feet??

Cleverbot: No Sorry.

User: His feet are the best-est thing the world!!

Cleverbot: I think therefore I am.

User: 당신 are what? :D.

Cleverbot: I think therefore I exist, beyond that I can be sure of nothing.

User: Yay!!

Cleverbot: So cleverbot, tell me of your adventures!

User: I am Mort!

Cleverbot: Are 당신 sure?

User: Yes! I like being sure! :).

Cleverbot: Same here.

User: Yay!

Cleverbot: How smart are you?

User: My tail, Rodney, says I an smart!

Cleverbot: Are we still best friends?

User:...
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Chapter 8

Skipper made his way into the Clock Tower, and just like the last time he was there in the normal castle, a quick flash of light came and went and the fingers on the clock both started to move. They both landed on the six, which was on the 상단, 맨 위로 instead of the bottom due to everything in the 성 being in reverse. And just like the last time, it rang thirteen times. Dong…dong…dong…dong…dong…dong…dong…dong…dong…dong… dong…dong…dong. The floor opened and Skipper made his way up. When he arrived he found an elevator just like the last time, but instead of going...
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Chapter 7

Skipper arrived at the 성 where everything was flipped upside down. Instead of being on the floor, he was on the cleaning, and everything was on was the floor was now above Skipper. He was still in the 왕좌, 왕위 room so he will have to figure out a way to get to the dark priest. But then he saw a 펭귄 with the same outfit he was wearing. Skipper ran to the penguin, and when he got closer he saw his face. It was his face. It was Skipper! A clone of Skipper has been made, obviously to take the real Skipper’s place and be evil. Skipper took out his sword, and the evil Skipper took...
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Chapter 5

Skipper opened his eyes; he wasn't in the 성 anymore. He looked around to see where he was. He then recognized where he was. This was the time and place of Skipper Alucard's worse 일 ever. The 일 he saw his own mother, Lisa, be executed. She was to be executed due to the fact she was married to Count Blowhole. Though she was only a mortal penguin, villagers believed she was a witch because she loved such an evil soul. Skipper ran 앞으로 has he heard a crowd of angry villagers with torches and pitchforks yelling 'Burn the Witch!' Behind the crowd, Skipper looked up to see his...
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Clock Tower: Take 1

*BONG*

Private: "OW! MY EARHOLES!" *clenches side of head & falls off clock tower*

Director: "Private! I told 당신 it would be loud & to come prepared!"

Private: "What!?"

Director: "I said I told 당신 it would be loud & to come prepared!"

Private: "What do shrouds have to do with this?!"

Director: "NO! LOUD!"

Private: "What's loud?!"

Director: "The clock tower! I told 당신 to come prepared!"

Private: "THERE'S A 곰 ON THE CLOCK TOWER?!"

Director: *slaps forehead*

Clock Tower: Take 2

*BONG*

*penguins are shown on the clock tower & jumping off*

Skipper/Private/Rico: *land...
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Before 당신 read this story, please no flames and please don't tell me about any grammar mistakes I made. No flames because it really took me two years to make this story. I started in 2010, never got to it because I have struggling, stopped the story, and then finally now I got to it and I was able to finish it. I worked so hard on this story, 당신 have no idea. I know I make grammar mistakes and I do my best to fix them all but if I didn't get to them all I'm sorry, I tried. One 더 많이 note, for anyone who played this game I based this story on just so 당신 know I'm not adding the whole game....
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At the 공식 만찬, 저녁 식사 table, the feast is blanketed with silence, above the background noise of protestors against me. The smuggling pressure of my father's constant want for a different son, and the crowd's demand for Cain as prince, makes me realize I don't even want the throne. It is if there is no place for me. The only one I feel refuge in is my mother. Only is my father cheerful, on this dark night. His eyes beaming with excitement as he instructs of how to defeat my foe.
"And if 당신 lose you'll end up like this fish: On the seal's 공식 만찬, 저녁 식사 plate." He chuckles, gulping down a plump grouper. My...
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Inflatium Diagnosis: Take 1

Kowalski: "...Julien! 당신 must stay away from Skipper!"

Julien: "You will listen to me! I will party-se--"

*--Kowalski slams door in his face*

Julien: "OW MAN! 당신 TOTALLY JUST HIT MY NOSEY PARTS WITH THE DOOR!"

Kowalski: "Oops..." *giggling like a school girl on the inside*

Inflatium Diagnosis: Take 2

Kowalski: "...Julien! 당신 must stay away from Skipper!"

Julien: "You will listen to me! I will party-se--"

*--Kowalski slams door in his face*

Julien: "OW! 당신 ARE TOTALLY DOING THIS ON PURPOSE! GET THE DOOR OFF MY HAND! GET IT OFF..."

Kowalski: *opens door* "Sorry...Are yo--"...
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Chrrosdefishinatizer: Take 1

Skipper: "...Yep! Won't be long till he comes bursting out of that room with a screwball device, with an unpronounceable name."

Private: "Then blows up."

Skipper: "That's a given."

Kowalski: *bursts out of lab* "I've done it! I have invented the Churrosdefishoeaofdl...UUGGH! 당신 know this really is unpronounceable right!?"

Director: "Kowalski...We talked about this."

Kowalski: "Yeah, yeah. I know. Just suck it up & do the line."

Churrosdefishinatizer: Take 2

Skipper: "...Yep! Won't be long till he comes bursting out of that room with a screwball device, with an unpronounceable...
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The Bus Called Graveyard 8: Take 1

Kowalski: "Pull up a 좌석 and set a spell while this spooky tale I relate. 'Bout the meanest mess of steel and wheels man never did create. The bus called Graveyard Eight."

Rico: ...

Kowalski: "Rico?"

Rico: ...

Kowalski: "Has anyone seen Rico?"

Rico: *snores*

Kowalski: "Uuuugh. He's sleeping behind the dumpsters again. Rico! Wake up!"

Rico: "WHAT! HIIIIIYAA!" *kicks Kowalski in the face*

Kowalski: "Oww!"

Rico: "Oh, sorry 'bout that."

The Bus Called Graveyard 8: Take 2

Kowalski: "Pull up a 좌석 and set a spell while this spooky tale I relate. 'Bout the meanest mess of...
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'What the heck is that?'

Marlene - Jakiś raban, dziwne światło.

Roy - Atakują, czuję że nie będzie łatwo.

Burt - Zbudził właśnie mnie nieziemski trzask.

Mason - A ja słyszałem gdzieś przedziwny wrzask.

Bing - To nie ja tylko Bada.

Bada - Bo ja się ten, no... przejąłem!

Maurice - Więc cóż to za blask?

Pinky - To głęboce razi nas.

Mason - Rękoma dajesz znak, jest za mną, tak?

Burt - Co za dziwne coś!

Roy - Co za dziwne coś!

Bada - Co to za typ wisi i gapi się?

Joey - Czekaj no, niech ciut przetrę oko nim swe!

Bing - Paskudne, brudne i złe na wskroś!

Bada and Bing - Jakieś dziwne...
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posted by King_Julien_fan
'Thump'

Guy - Co to jest, ach co?

Kowalski - Straszny sprzęt wmuszający śpiew.

Skipper - Spójrz teraz nie widzisz mnie.

King Julien - Trzeba cię powstrzymać dziś,
tak mówi mały miś.
Dajcie mi bas,
to oczaruję was.
Dajcie mi dźwięk,
ujrzycie tyłka wdzięk.

Zaczynamy bimbę i wszyscy razem
bam, bam, bam! Yeah!
Kolanami w brodę wal
i bam, bam, bam!

Poczuj ten flow,
kiedy macham kitą swą!

Zaczynamy bimbę i wszyscy razem
bam, bam, bam!

Mort i Maurice
wyjedzą z kubła ryż.

Zaczynamy bimbę i wszyscy razem
*bam, bam, bam*

Tak się właśnie tańczy tu,
Tak się właśnie tańczy tam.
Tak się właśnie...
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At Los Angeles Convention Center about 15 years in the future

Carsfan: (as a reporter) A huge crowd of fellow fanguins are waiting outside the Los Angeles Convention Center, the location of the POM Convention, to catch a glimpse of their idols before it starts. They should be here any moment. Wait, yes, yes, they're here. The penguins are here! (a limo pulls up and 70s/2020s version of the penguins come out)
70s Skipper: Are 당신 sure about this look, Kowalski?
70s Kowalski: 당신 have to 옮기기 backward to go foreward, Skipper! Besides, I believe some fanguins here pretty muched begged to see us like...
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Chapter 11: the Siege of the Central Park Zoo
The siege of the Central Park Zoo had begun with a wave of crabs. “Okay, Guardians, let’s defeat the evil!” Soren led the attack, with Twilight, who was carrying Erik, was directly behind him. Digger was carrying Mort, who was carrying an extra set of battle claws, fitted for 여우 원숭이 use. “Watch out Soren, there using Pure Ones and Dragon Owls. Soren set his sights on several pure ones. Erik then took out 6 of them in one shot. “Good job, Chick Magnet!” Soren exclaimed. Then Mort took out 6 더 많이 pure ones. “Awesome job, Sad Eyes!”...
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"SKIPPER!" Private screamed, a 게, 크랩 had clawed his bum, and wouldn't let go. He ran around frantically, Skipper extended his flipper *bam* Private hit Skippers flipper and fell flat on the hard black sea-stone. "Skipa!!" Rico screamed, his head had caught alight while trying to light a fire. "Ahh!!! Bob is angry!!" Kowalski screamed, his tuna 물고기 had caught alight. Skipper just stood and watched all three penguins running around frantically, he was on the verge of exploding with anger, he frowned so low 당신 could barley see his eyes. "Skipper!" He heard two voices cry from behind. "What is...
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In the "MAD" universe
Jack: Those penguins are right in front of us!!!
Ramsay: Don't worry, didn't 당신 say that 당신 can pull your head off and shoot 불, 화재 out of your eyes?
Jack: Yea.
Ramsay: Well, THROW YOUR HEAD AT THEM, SKELETON MAN!!! (Jack throws his head attempting to hit the penguins)
S: Rico, deploy Jackie Robinson pitcher mode! (Rico catches the head and throws it and it hits Team Johnny Test)
Susan: I'll press the net button. (presses a button and a net appears and catches Jack's head)
Johnny: Impressive. (everyone rides on the back of Clifford the Big Red Dog and go through the portal to...
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posted by stlouisfan
A shadowy figure grabbed Skipper's tape recorder and moved into a seperate and 더 많이 private room. The figure closed the door and made sure that he was alone. He pushed the record button on the tape recorder and began speaking.

"Private's log. June, 8th. I am very frightened now. It has been only a couple of days, but I fear that my life may be in danger. I've had some frightening enemies in the past. Dr. Blowhole, The Red Squirrel, and even the Amarillo Kid. But this guy frightens me 더 많이 than any of them combined. Who is this person that frightens me? I don't even know who he is. No, not he....
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*Guys, please note Starlite is my only OC,and this story is where i introduce her ...Enjoy*

Stalite woke up, feeling sick and dizzy. She took one deep breath, big mistake. A horrible smell filled her nostrils it 빙어, 빙 어 like garbage and foot odor, this did not help with the fact that she was already felling sick. She vomited, now she really felt weak and helpless...Only the 초 time ever in her life. "Starlite? Are 당신 there?" A familiar voice sounded somewhere in the dark distance."Help" Starlite croked, she sounded nothing like herself."Here, let me help 당신 down." It was Marlene, the only...
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*0200 hours 펭귄 HQ*
Kowalski: here's the coffee 당신 requested skipper, brewed to perfection with a fresh fish.
Skipper: greatly appreciated kowalski, besides the fact 당신 woke me up at 2:00 in the morning...anyways,what is the important "explosion" 당신 wanted to show me?
K: well,actually,if in the time of need, an explosion would be quite well for this, 당신 see when 당신 syntheticly-
S: just tell me what it does, I 로스트 당신 at well.
K: -_- ok,their biomachanicle androids,somewhat similar to Francis's,but they can change into any animal 당신 want them to be,and they NEVER disobey a 펭귄 when...
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