They left me a voice mail,My oldest daughter was on the phone I could tell she was trying to be strong.
"Hey,Dad....I miss 당신 and want 당신 to come back home,I 사랑 you"Her voice was cracking as if she were crying.
Then I heard my youngest daughter,Kenna.
"Daddy!!I miss you!!"She was crying.
I couldn't 곰 it,Was I monster for not finding forgiveness?
I felt like one,A lonely one.I turned off my phone,and got out of bed.I had been there so long,Maybe hours,or days,Buy when I looked at the 날짜 it had been 2 weeks.I barely noticed,I was just waiting to die.
"Sweety,Your up?"My mom walked in.
She sat 다음 to me on my bed.
"Yea..."
"How are 당신 feelin?"
"Not good."
"Here try this."She hand in her hand an antidepressant pill.
"I'm not that depressed..."I stood up quickly.
"Prove it."She said in a calm voice.
I then just stared at her.
"I can't.I just...."I took a deep breath in."I don't really know what to do."
In frustration I gripped my hair and started to walk in circles.
"Just try it,your sisters want to take 당신 out somewhere."
"I really dont wanna go any where."
"It would be best for you."
"Fine then I'll go."
I went into the bathroom and looked in the mirror.I was alone and it made a big diffrence.Everyday I'd wake up 다음 to Anna,To see her smile,then I'd 키스 her.She go in the bathroom and I'd brush her hair,But now I just stood there judging myself.
I opened the cabinent,in the cabinent sat a pack of cigarettes.I had quit smoking along time 이전 for my 팬 and my wife.At one point I even smoked weed.It was such a low time in my life,But standing there looking at a monster in the mirror,I was now lower.I got dressed and I took the cigarettes and left unoticed.I walked around the city,I came to an alley.I sat against the brick wall.I looked at my liter and cigarette.
So this is what rock bottom feels like,I asked myself
I lit it and took in a breath of deep smoke,It was like breathing misery.
"Psst,Hey..."Someone called out.
I looked around to find no one.I continued to smoke.
"Hey,You!"Someone threw a rock at me.
I got up on my feet,I felt a bit dizzy.There was a young man standing there.
"You looking for something to smoke?"he asked.
I nodded,He started to walk farther in the alley,I followed.
I looked at the spray paint on the bricks,I was at an all time low,It looked like a bunch of thugs vandalized it.He opened a door,We went in.In there was a bar,It was a dark,There was no electricity,There was a few candles.People sat staring at me,With there beaming eyes.Some eyes looked defeated and sad,Others looked disturbed and angered.I past 의해 a large man with 문신 covering his buff arms,He pulled out a 칼, 나이프 and smiled at me evilly.I followed the man into a bedroom.He took off his hoodie.He was just a teenager.
"How much?"he asked.
I took out 30 pounds and gave to him.
"I change my mind,Son get a good job."I told him.
I walked out of the 침대 room,In to the bar.The bartender kept looking at me.She looked familiar.
"Daddy,That's the guy!!!!He left me!!"She yelled.
I realized it was the woman I met on the plane.
The large man stood up,Some guys grabbed me.They started to 펀치 me.I tried to kick them and get them off me.Then I heard a gun shot off,Peopke started screaming and running.The man slowly walked toward me,with a knife.Fear rose in my 심장 and threw out my body.The guys picked me up and put me on a table.It hurt to 옮기기 from them punching and kicking me.The man put the 칼, 나이프 against my neck.
"Are 당신 scared,You little bitch."He cursed with a twisted smile.
"No,I've wish to be dead for along time."I told him.
He pressed it closer,Slightly cutting me.Then suddenly the young teenager pushed the man.He helped me up and we ran out.
After awhile of running,I got lost.I looked at my phone,I ran for about 30 minutes,I guessed I must have ran 2 and a half miles.My body was shaking,Why couldn't he just had killed me?
I sat down once 더 많이 and continued to smoke.I 로스트 track of time and fell asleep.
I felt something on my chest,
"No,Anna...Just one 더 많이 minute.."I said.
I opened my eyes there was a 쥐 on me,I screamed.
I was dissapointed to find I was awoken again,Living in reality.The most glorious dream I dreamt of,I was back home,With Anna.I got up and started to walk home.
It was about..I didn't really know what time,It was late.
"Where have 당신 been?"My mother asked.
I closed the door and walked into the light.
"Oh my god,My baby.Look at you."
I had bruises on my face.
"I went out early this morning,To the grocery store.On my way I was mugged."I lied.
"Oh really?Then whose this,He showed up earlier with your I.D,He hasn't said a word."
The young boy stepped out from behind her.
I could see him better.
We sat together,At the 공식 만찬, 저녁 식사 table,My mom fed him spaghetti.
He ate very quickly as he hadn't ate in months.
"Whats your name?"My mom asked him.
He looked at her,and his plate he had ate all of it.
"Want more?"She asked.
He knodded.
"Then tell me,What's your name?"
He looked down at his plate.
"My name is Alfonso."He wispered."You may call me Alex."
She took his plate and went to the stove and put some 더 많이 on his plate.She sat down with the plate.
"Well,Alex,How old are you?"
He hestitated.
"I'm 17"He said.
"Your lying..."She said."Don't lie to me,I've tookin 당신 in to my home,and fed you."
"I'm 13."He said truthfully.
She gave him the plate.
"I'm Trisha,You may call me,Mrs.Trisha,and this is Zayn,Call him as 당신 wish.Do 당신 have somewhere to stay tonite?"She asked.
"Yes.."
"Why would lie?I just told 당신 not to."She scolded."Look at me."
She stood up and went 다음 to his chair.He looked her in the eyes.
"Anyone who saved my sons life is welcome here."she said.
He hugged her suprisingly and started crying in her arms,She hugged him back.I could tell he was afraid.
"It's okay,Your going to be alright,Were going to help you."
