Part 8: link


    “Yes?” Gwen turns at the soft knock behind her.
    “Excuse me, my lady, the prince left these behind on the training field and he will be looking for them tomorrow,” Sir Leon says, stepping into the young prince’s room, holding a pair of small leather gloves.
    “Hi, Sir Leon,” Llacheu greets the tall knight from his bed.
    “Good evening, my lord,” Leon nods, handing the gloves to Gwen. He smiles at the young prince. “All ready for bed, then?”
    “No, but Mum says it’s time,” he frowns, then betrays himself with a yawn while his fist comes up to rub an eye.
    “I think your Mum is right,” Leon says, smiling at Gwen. She gives a small smile in return, but keeps her attention mainly on the five-year-old boy in his bed.
    “Goodnight, Llacheu,” Leon says, reaching down to ruffle the boy’s curls fondly.
    “’Night, Sir Leon,” he answers, snuggling into the blankets.
    “My lady,” he nods at Gwen and heads somewhat reluctantly out.
    Gwen finishes the story she was telling Llacheu, the tale of how his father acquired the trident of the Fisher King, aided 의해 his mysterious and seldom-seen godfather, Merlin, and another knight, Sir Gwaine. I think I would like Sir Gwaine very much if he wasn’t in Avalon with Daddy, Llacheu thinks, just assuming Gwaine is in Avalon as well.
    “Where is the trident now, Mummy?”
    “In the vaults, with all the other precious and important items your father acquired for the kingdom. Safe.”
    “I should like to see it,” he yawns.
    “Perhaps one day,” she says, leaning down to 키스 his forehead, then his cheek, then his cheek again, in a different place.
    “Mum!” he protests, giggling as her lips approach his face again.
    “Goodnight, my love,” she says, smoothing his unruly hair back away from his forehead. He looks so like Arthur, it makes my 심장 ache sometimes, she thinks sadly, glancing back at him one 더 많이 time before blowing out the last candle.
    “My lady,” Leon’s soft voice reaches her ears in the corridor once she’s shut the door to the prince’s rooms, “may I walk with you?”
    “Of course,” Gwen says, taking his offered arm. Leon notices she leans on him a bit 더 많이 heavily than usual. She works too hard.
    They walk in silence for a few moments, but Gwen knows her knight has something on his mind. She staves it off. “You spend too much of your free time with the prince,” she says carefully, “I appreciate your care, but surely 당신 have other interests?”
    “Nothing that is 더 많이 important than being a good role model for the prince,” he 답변 carefully. “With his father gone, I…” he trails off, knowing it is still a delicate topic.
    “Yes, I know. He needs strong male guidance, and 당신 and Percival both have been excellent in that area. But 당신 mustn’t neglect other people in your life. Your family, friends… perhaps a special lady that may have caught your eye?”
    Leon says nothing at first. “I do not look after the prince out of a sense of obligation, my lady,” he says carefully. “He’s a good boy, and I like him. And… I do it for Arthur, to honor him. I want Arthur to be proud of his son, even if it is from the spirit world,” he explains, and suddenly it occurs to Gwen that Arthur’s death has affected Leon deeper than he ever let on, even after six years. “And besides, he’s asked for extra training. I couldn’t say no to that, now, could I?”
    “Of course not,” Gwen says, smiling because she knows whose influence is behind her son’s request.
    “I really don’t mind. I like working, 당신 know that,” Leon adds.
    He hides behind his rules and his structure, burying his grief 의해 throwing himself into the one thing he knows better than anything else: being a knight, she thinks.
    “As for my family and friends, well, as 당신 know, most of my family is gone, and those that I consider my true 프렌즈 understand,” he continues.
    “I see,” Gwen says, noting that he does not mention a lady. “Forgive my prying, but with Percival getting married 다음 week, I could not help but notice that 당신 have somehow managed to elude matrimony all these years.”
    “Well, um, as far as female companionship goes…” he pauses and takes a deep breath. “There is one lady who I would look upon very favorably, if she would allow it,” he says, stopping now, turning to face her. He looks down at her, his eyes hopeful pools of blue.
    I have suspected this for some time, Gwen thinks. She touches his arm gently. “Sir Leon, I am honored that 당신 think of me so fondly. And flattered. And 당신 know that 당신 are dear to me, and I do 사랑 you.”
    “But?” he asks exhaling his held breath.
    “But I cannot give 당신 the kind of 사랑 당신 are seeking. The kind of 사랑 당신 deserve. Any fond feelings I have for 당신 are… like those I would have for a brother. I’m sorry,” she finishes with a whisper, dropping her hand and looking down.
    “I understand,” he says sadly.
    “My capacity to give… that kind of 사랑 died with Arthur,” she says, still whispering, a tear slipping from her eye, her hand drifting up to finger the crystal hanging around her neck.
    “Yes, my lady,” Leon whispers, feeling a bit embarrassed now.
    “Leon, do not feel foolish,” Gwen says, sensing his discomfort. “You couldn’t know, and 당신 wouldn’t know unless 당신 asked. 당신 are still my First Knight and my most trusted advisor, and I could not do any of this without you.”
    “Thank you, my lady.”
    “And I do 사랑 that 당신 사랑 Llacheu like he is your own. In the absence of his father, I could not ask for better role 모델 for him than 당신 and Percival,” she says, touching his arm again.
    “But that is all it can be,” he says.
    “Yes,” Gwen whispers. “I’m—”
    “Do not apologize again, please. I am glad that 당신 can be honest with me, even if I do not like the answer,” he says, straightening up again, ever chivalrous.
    “I would like to retire to my rooms now,” Gwen says, shifting gears. “Would 당신 escort me, please?”
    “It would be my pleasure, my lady.”
    “Leon, we have known each other nearly our entire lives. 당신 can call me Gwen.”
    “I know.”
    They walk the rest of the short way in a fairly comfortable silence. They know what has passed between them will go no further than the two of them; neither worry about gossip starting because one of them has spoken out of turn.
    “Good night, my lady,” Leon says quietly.
    Gwen squeezes his arm before releasing it. She lifts up on tiptoe and kisses his cheek. “Good night, Sir Leon,” she answers, then disappears into her room.
    Distance. He needs the distance. That is why he won’t address me 의해 name, Gwen realizes, leaning on the door. I feel terrible for breaking his 심장 like that, but I am glad it is out now. And it would be cruel of me to lead him on when I do not feel as he does, just because I am lonely some nights.
    Her head against the wood of the door, she hears Leon’s footfalls as he finally walks away, to his own quarters within the castle.

xXx

    “Arthur, I’m so glad to see 당신 tonight,” Gwen says, practically hurling herself into his arms. “I need to see 당신 tonight,” she whispers against his chest.
    “You are exhausted, my love,” Arthur says, his arms tight around her.
    “Not you, too,” Gwen sighs. “Everyone seems to think I’m working too hard, that I’m exhausted, that something must be wrong. Do I look that terrible? Usually ‘you look tired,’ really means ‘you look bad.’ Arthur?”
    “There is some heaviness about your eyes, Guinevere. And your smiles are rarer, which isn’t normal,” Arthur 답변 honestly, running his finger along her cheek.
    “Oh. Thank 당신 for your honesty,” she frowns, dropping her head against his chest.
    “So why was it 당신 needed to see me so urgently?” Arthur asks, 키싱 the 상단, 맨 위로 of her head.
    “I just need you.”
    “Nothing to do with Sir Leon confessing that he has been in 사랑 with 당신 for years now?”
    She doesn’t answer, but he feels her body sag against him. “Years?” she finally asks.
    “Since before I was even dead, I think,” Arthur chuckles. “Though he would never admit it to himself. I think he would be horrified, honestly. Now that I’ve been gone six years, maybe he decided it was a respectable enough amount of time.”
    “Leon is nothing if not respectable,” Gwen still stands against him, her head turned, her cheek on his chest.
    “Guinevere, if you… if 당신 wished to remarry, you… 당신 could not do better than…”
    “No, Arthur!” she interrupts him. “It wasn’t just idle words I gave him when I told him that I did not think of him that way, that my 심장 will only ever desire you.” She looks up at him, her face earnest. Then she looks down. “It would feel like another betrayal.”
    Arthur is silent a minute. They had not spoken of the event since Arthur proposed the 초 time. “You did not betray me, Guinevere,” he finally says, his voice quiet.
    “Yes, Arthur, I did. Just because we agreed never to speak of it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.”
    “Guinevere, 당신 never betrayed me. Not of your own free will, anyway.”
    She leans back and looks up at him. “What?”
    “Your… kiss… with Lancelot. That was Morgana’s doing.”
    She steps back now. “What?” she asks, 더 많이 emphatically this time.
    “Lancelot is here, in Avalon. Merlin sent him here after he died. The 초 time. He… he sought me out recently and told me everything.”
    Gwen’s hands are clasped over her mouth now, in shock.
    “I asked him if he would like to see you. He said no. Said he couldn’t face you. Said he didn’t deserve to look on 당신 another time,” Arthur tells her softly.
    Gwen still says nothing, just watching Arthur, waiting and listening.
    “Morgana brought him back from the other side using some dark and powerful magic. Fed him information. Told him how to act, what to say, what to do. He was her puppet as much as 당신 were after the dark tower.” She still says nothing, so he continues. “Morgana expected 당신 to go running to him as soon as 당신 saw him. But when 당신 didn’t, because 당신 loved me and not him,” Arthur pauses, smiling, tiny but smug, “she had to resort to stronger measures.”
    “Do not cry, my love. I never could 곰 your tears,” he says, reaching out to wipe her tears from her cheeks. “Lancelot gave 당신 a bracelet?”
    “Yes,” she whispers, astonished. She never mentioned the bracelet to Arthur. “It… it made me desire him?”
    Arthur nods. “It was all Morgana’s doing, and she had to force 당신 to do it. But ultimately it didn’t work, and we found our way back to each other.”
    “Our 사랑 is strong magic,” she says, repeating his words from a visit four and a half years ago.
    “Indeed. We found our way back and became stronger as a result. So she failed miserably.”
    Gwen goes quiet again, even turning away from Arthur a moment. “That… bitch!” she finally says, hissing angrily. Arthur blinks in surprise at her harsh epithet. “I mean… to do something so… dishonorable…”
    “She underestimated you, Love. 당신 were beyond reproach, which is why she had to resort to the bracelet.”
    “I was talking about Lancelot, actually,” Gwen says, turning back to him. “To… sully the name and reputation of such an honorable man. Lancelot gave his life to free us from the Dorocha, and he never had an unkind word to say about anyone.”
    “Nearly the same can be said of you, Guinevere,” Arthur says. He feels no sense of jealousy 또는 discomfort at her defense of Lancelot, and is acutely aware of the fact that, were they all still living, he would be sullen with jealousy at her words. “You did not give your life for Camelot, but you, too, are honorable and brave. Morgana took two of the most inherently good people in Camelot and dragged both their names and reputations through the mud. The very fact that she would even think of such a plan makes my blood run cold. If it wasn’t already cold, I mean.”
    Gwen snorts a surprised laugh, despite herself. He always could make me laugh at the most inappropriate times. Finally, she sighs. “You are right. It doesn’t matter anymore. It didn’t work and we grew stronger and closer and now I am sitting on what she always referred to as her throne.”
    “Right,” Arthur says, reaching out for her again, pulling her close. “So you’re not interested in Sir Leon, then?”
    “No!” she exclaims, exasperated.
    “Good.”
    “But I thought 당신 said…”
    “Well, I would have been okay with it, and if 당신 would be happy, then that’s what important. I didn’t say I loved the idea. I only want 당신 to be happy, my love.”
    He bends his head down and kisses her, sucking lightly at her lips, nipping the lower one gently. “I do so 사랑 these lips of yours,” he whispers, 키싱 her 상단, 맨 위로 lip, then the bottom, very deliberately.
    “It’s time,” he sighs, resting his forehead against hers.
    “Already?”
    He nods, moving both their heads, and kisses her one 더 많이 time.
    “Tell Lancelot that I am sorry,” Gwen says.
    “For what? I mean, that’s what he’ll ask.”
    “I don’t know. I just feel like I should apologize,” she shrugs.
    “He told me to tell 당신 the same thing,” Arthur chuckles. “I told him he was mad. He’s really a good guy. I mean, I always knew he was a good knight, but I was too busy being jealous of him to really get to know him as a person.”
    “Jealous? Were 당신 that insecure, 또는 did 당신 doubt my feelings?”
    “I was that insecure,” he admits. “I know that now.”
    “Well, I 사랑 you, Arthur, even in death. Always have; no one else. I 사랑 당신 so much that there is nothing left in my 심장 for any living man. Not even for the ridiculously gallant and seemingly indestructible Sir Leon.”
    “Well, 당신 사랑 our son, obviously,” Arthur points out.
    “Different kind of love, silly.”
    “Right.”
    “With all my heart, Arthur, remember?” she asks.

xXx

    There is a soft knock at Gwen’s door while she sits, picking at her breakfast. “Yes?” she calls, and a smiling face pokes his head in.
    “Hi.”
    “Merlin!” Gwen says, turning in her chair. “Come in,” she says, standing to embrace her friend. “This is an unexpected surprise, we just saw 당신 a week 이전 for the prince’s birthday. It’s not like 당신 return so quickly.”
    “I must be losing my touch,” he says, smiling a lopsided smile.
    “Come sit, have some food,” Gwen motions, sitting again and pushing her plate over.
    Merlin sits, setting a large parcel down on the floor beside him.
    “I can’t take your breakfast, Gwen,” he says, trying to push it back.
    “I’m done. Don’t let it go to waste.”
    “Gwen, you’ve barely eaten anything.” He looks closely at her. “You’re not well.”
    “I’m just a little tired these days,” Gwen huffs. “Why does everyone think I’m ill?”
    “That wasn’t a question, Gwen. 당신 are not well. I am telling 당신 this.”
    She opens her mouth a moment, then closes it. “Where is Sefa?” she asks.
    “Don’t change the subject. I want 당신 to see Gaius as soon as 당신 can.”
    “Fine,” she sighs. “Now eat, and tell me where Sefa is. She is supposed to be with you.”
    “She is. Just not at the moment. And yes, I know exactly where she is, and yes, I trust that she will not run off. She’s with Aithusa.”
    “The little white dragon? 당신 found her?”
    “Yes,” Merlin smiles. “Though not so little anymore. 당신 should see the two of them. Aithusa… I’m slowly learning about her. She doesn’t speak, so it’s difficult, but I think Morgana managed to build an innate distrust of men in her. She obeys me because she must, but she trusts Sefa. I don’t think she quite trusts me yet.”
    “That’s… really good, Merlin. How is Sefa?”
    “She is good. A lot smarter than I think any of us realized. Her father held her back in many ways. She is so innocent, it’s almost like she’s an empty vessel, waiting to be filled with knowledge and skills. She has this… bond with Aithusa.”
    Gwen listens, enjoying watching Merlin consume the rest of her breakfast. He always had such enthusiasm for food, she remembers, and she also understands why.
    “Finding Aithusa was not a problem,” Merlin continues, his mouth full of food. “All I had to do was call her, and she came. But she shrank away, cowering, until Sefa stepped forward. She spoke gently to her, assuring her that I wouldn’t harm her.” He looks up, and Gwen passes him her goblet. “Thank you.” He takes a drink and continues.
    “It… hurts a little, 당신 know? I brought Aithusa into the world, I named her, and she is skittish around me. I am kind to her and treat her well, but I am firm with her. I… she respects me as a dragonlord, and I think, in her way, she loves me, but…”
    “She is warmer with Sefa, 더 많이 affectionate? Friendlier?” Gwen asks.
    Merlin nods. “I’m jealous. I’m the dragonlord, yet Sefa has 참드 the dragon.”
    Gwen smiles at him. “It sounds like 당신 are doing everything right, Merlin. Aithusa will come around. Try to think of it from her point of view: she probably fears 당신 because she knows 당신 could make her do anything, and, as 당신 said, Morgana probably colored her opinions of men, perhaps even you, once she found out your true identity. Keep trying. She will come around.”
    “Thanks, Gwen. That means a lot, coming from you.”
    “Me?”
    “You’re a mother. I feel kind of parental towards Aithusa, and so your words are encouraging.”
    “So Sefa is with Aithusa now? Where are they? Can I see Aithusa?”
    “They are in a clearing not far from here. The place where I took 당신 to meet Kilgarrah.”
    “You could have brought them closer,” Gwen says, frowning.
    “I didn’t want to frighten anyone. Sefa is trying to teach Aithusa how to talk,” he chuckles. “It’s very interesting.”
    “I can imagine,” Gwen says.
    “Where’s the Bug?” Merlin asks, pushing the empty plate away.
    “Training, of course. Why?”
    “I have something for him, but he can’t have it right now.”
    “Is that what that is?” she asks, nodding at the parcel.
    “Yeah,” he says, reaching down and picking it up, clearing a 우주 on the table.
    “Is that a sword?” Gwen asks, noting the size and shape.
    Merlin chuckles. “Still a blacksmith’s daughter,” he says, unwrapping the cloth.
    Gwen gasps. “That’s not…”
    “No,” Merlin says. “It’s not Arthur’s. Arthur’s is in the lake, waiting. It’s being looked after 의해 a friend of mine.” His eyes get distant and wistful for a moment, but Gwen does not ask.
    He withdraws the sword from its sheath, and the blade practically sings when he lifts it into the air.
    “It’s beautifully crafted, Merlin. Where did 당신 get it?”
    “Mercia. I spent some time there, and one 일 I was… drawn to the blacksmith’s shop. The smith there reminded me of your father, actually,” he chuckles, “burly but kind, with an easy smile. I asked him for his finest sword, something out of the ordinary. His best work.”
    “Like 당신 did for… Merlin, Arthur’s sword. My father made that, didn’t he? That was the one I gave you.”
    He nods. “I had Kilgarrah forge the blade further in his breath, blessing it with his powerful magic.”
    “Then how did Arthur…?”
    “Mordred’s blade was similarly made. Morgana had Aithusa, remember? And Arthur still managed to run Mordred through with his sword, and I dispatched Morgana with it. This sword,” he holds it up again, “is also forged in a dragon’s breath. For Llacheu, when he is of age.”
    “Merlin, I don’t know…” Gwen says, uneasy. “Aithusa’s magic on Mordred’s sword killed Arthur…”
    “Then is it not fitting that she make amends for that deed in the only way that she can?” He turns the sword, offering Gwen the handle.
    She hesitantly takes it.
    “If it helps, Aithusa did not want to do it again,” he says, his voice dropping to almost a whisper. “She hesitated. She knows what happened, how the last blade she burnished was used. Like Sefa, she was an innocent pawn, bent to the will of another. I spoke to Aithusa gently, telling her that she would be helping Arthur’s son. ‘I will not command 당신 to do this, Aithusa,’ I said. ‘But I will ask you, as your guardian and your friend, to bless this blade for the only son of Arthur Pendragon and good 퀸 Guinevere.’ She nodded then, and let her 불, 화재 loose on it.”
    “Where was Sefa when this happened? Did she help convince Aithusa?”
    “She was there, but I asked her not to intervene, not to help. This was something that I needed to do. And Aithusa, I think gained a little trust in me then, knowing that I won’t force her to do anything she doesn’t want to. Not without reason, anyway.”
    “You sound like a father,” Gwen smiles approvingly. “And I don’t know how to wield a sword very well, but I know fine smithing when I see it.” She stands, sits again quickly, then stands again, 더 많이 slowly, and sheaths the sword. Merlin gives her a look.
    “Yes, I will see Gaius this afternoon,” she sighs.
    Merlin nods and wraps the sword up again. “Not until he is of age,” he reminds her, handing it to her.
    “Yes, yes, I remember. I will keep it 안전한, 안전 for him. Maybe entrust it to Leon for safekeeping.”
    “You have a council meeting,” Merlin says. “I’m going to watch the training and surprise the prince.”

Part 10: link