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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my list of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let 당신 know now i got alot of these from the 유튜브 channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything 또는 eating anything 당신 might spit it 또는 something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the 비, 빗자루 late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the 만, 베이 they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's favorite...
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added by kenzichu
posted by TOTALIzzyluver
1) Lick your best friend's foot for 10 seconds
2) Rub glue on your face and stick various things on it.
3) Go up to a 랜덤 strange and ask them for $50 dollars for a nose job
4) Go to a public bathroom and sit on the floor and when someone walks in yell this "GO AWAY! CAN'T 당신 SEE I'M CLEANING!"
5)Put on a strange outfit and stand on the side of the road and throw pretzels at passing cars
6) Go to Wal-mart and go to a worker and have a conversation that goes kinda like this
YOU-Excuse me. Do 당신 guys sell like everything? WALMART PERSON- Yeah. YOU-So where can I find the cars? My son wants a...
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posted by Bubblekat
1. Go around stores, pick up items and yell out really loudly "Who buys this CRAP anyway?!"

2. Get a cart, get on the bar below the bar 당신 grip, and push it down the isle, extra points for running into something 또는 someone

3. Go up to a 랜덤 person and say "you have pretty eyes, may I have your eyes?!" and hear to see what they say

4. Laugh randomly

5. If someones talking on a cellphone Go closer to them and start maki 랜덤 noises to disturb them, extra points if they hang up

6. If your near a 분수 run to it and start splashing in it

7. If your mom starts nagging to 당신 in public about the...
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1. Try to start a wave

2. Gasp every time there is a swear word.

3. Wear a huge Afro wig.

4. Every 15 분 stand up and then sit back down.

5. Yell out to the screen “Don’t Do It!”

6. If there is a 사랑 scene, reach over in front of 당신 and cover a 랜덤 person’s eyes.

7. Stand in front of the screen motionless and face the audience the entire movie.

8. Scalp tickets outside the theater.

9. If a catchy song plays in the movie stand up and dance.

10. Bring an attachable seat-belt. Strap it to your 좌석 and then clip it on yourself. Turn to the person 다음 to 당신 and say, “you never know”....
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Dare

1. Prank call your best friend.

2. Run around the neighborhood screaming, "I 사랑 GAY PEOPLE!"

3. Ask your parents when they first had sex.

3. Pour mayo, ketchup, vinegar, and sugar and into a cup and drink the contents.

4. Sing the first song that comes to your head in your loudest voice.

5. Scream and say, "My water bottle broke!" (I did this and many people heard it as "my water broke lol)

6. Ask your crush out then dump him/her 5 mins later.

7. Whenever someone tries to explain something to 당신 say, "Why don't 당신 speak 더 많이 clearly?"

8. Run around the house in your underwear. (Recommended...
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I'm a girl pervert!I say guys are crazy cuz they think I touch their butts!I blame it on their hormones even though I touched their butts alot!

1.Be a real pervert

2.You don't have to look like one but just act like one

3.Always when you're walking behind a guy always look at their butt!And say"say veiw" then touch it nice and gently! :)

4.They look back and ask 당신 say'what?no way especially not your flat ass!!!!"when they turn around find another butt to look at!

5.Look at their muscles when they're wearing 셔츠 sleeve shirts and they're doing heavy lifting

6.Take pictures as well

7.Always comment...
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posted by sakurahanazono
Alpha kenny body

1.)Write down on a piece of paper "Alpha kenny body" and get someone to read it. (it sounds like they're saying I'll fuck anybody xD)

I won a math debate

2.)Write down "I won a math debate" and once again get someone to read it. (It should sound like they're saying I want to masterbate xD)

Eye map ness

3.) Say: Eye
Spell: Map
Say: ness

Write this down on paper and 당신 have to do as instructed on the left. (It sounds like they're saying I'm a penis xD)


Eye Emma rate hard

4.) write down "Eye emma rate hard" down on a piece of paper (it sounds like they're saying I'm a retard)

Eye M egg ay

5.) Say: Eye
Say: M
Say: egg
Say: ay

(It should sound like they're saying I am a gay xD)
posted by Delilah_Scruggs
NOTE: These "facts" have not necessarily been verified. They are just for fun.

1.If 당신 keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.

2.San Francisco cable cars are the only National Monuments that move.

3.Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England, but only in tropical 물고기 stores.

4.A Wisconsin 지게차 operator for a Miller 맥주 distributor was fired when a picture was published in a newspaper showing him drinking a Bud Light.

5.More people study English in China than speak it in the United States of America (300 million).

6.For every person on earth, there are an estimated...
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posted by 1-2vampire
The Brittish Nursery Rhyme about Bloody Mary - Mary Tudor - 또는 Mary I.

Mary Mary quite contrary,
how does your garden grow?
With silver bells and cockleshells
And pretty maids all in a row


We thought it was about a girl named Mary who liked gardening 또는 something - WRONG.

It is in fact about Mary Tudor, or, 더 많이 commenly reffered to as Bloody Mary.

Contrary - Means changing things just for the sake of it (Mary Tudor changed Britain back into a Roman Catholic country after her father and her brother changed it into a Protestant way)

How does your Garden Grow? - Mary wanted a baby very badly, but she...
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added by XxKeithHarkinxX
Source: 구글
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just got this while browsing the net

1.I was kidnapped 의해 terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.

2.I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to my teacher's heavy workload.

3.A bunch of nerds 스톨, 훔친 it to make sure theirs were completely perfect.

4.We ran out of toilet paper at my house last night, and my Dad isn't feeling so good. He grabbed it in a big rush and I haven't seen it since.

5.My mother took it to have it framed.

6.It was in my back pocket and a pickpocket 스톨, 훔친 it.

7.I let somebody copy it but they never gave it back.

8.My mom's whooping cough vaccination...
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posted by IsabellaMCullen
I didn't make this, I just found it...


1.Stick your open palm under the stall 벽 and ask your neighbor, "May I borrow a highlighter?"

2.Say, "Uh oh, I knew I shouldn't have put my lips on that."

3.Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.

4.Say, "Damn, this water's cold."

5.Drop a marble and say, "Oh shit! My glass eye!"

6.Say, "Hmmm, I've never seen that color before."

7.Grunt and strain real loud for 30 초 and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.

8.Say, "Now how did that get there?"

9.Say, "Humus....
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I never thought I would be doing a list like this because when I do lists based on looks it's on women. As a straight guy, it's easier for me to rank women than men. However, when I put my mind to something I try my best to come through. I had already done this list with women and I remember being asked if I would ever do it with men, so here it is. Keep in mind this is all just my personal opinion as a straight guy and it wasn't easy to figure out AT ALL! Please 코멘트 but be polite. Also, always 코멘트 because I worked HARD on this and during a time I had just had laser eye surgery and...
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Step one: enjoy/love/like the show, book, movie, and/or band.
Good job, that's it, you're a true fan.

One thing that just never fails to annoy me is when someone tells me (or another person honestly) that they aren't a true 팬 of whatever it is they are a 팬 of for having a certain opinion.

One of the most common things I get is 'you're not a true 팬 because 당신 like the villains more'. Okay no let's talk about this for a second; the villains are a crucial part of the story. Villains are what essentially gives the show/book/movie its plot. Without villains there is no conflict and without...
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posted by Famegurl754
Aries: Trigon?
Reason: I think he is a good Aries. I'm not saying he was born onthat kind of day, I'm just saying this because I think it fit's him.

Taurus: Beast boy
Reason: he can some times be as MEAN as a bull, he can shape shift into any animal. Sometimes he's as sweet as a Mice, but then he's as mean as a bull.

Gemini: Mas y Menos
Reason: It's obvious, THE TWINS!! DUH!! I know Gemini's can be mysterious then happy but these to are probably Gemini's.

Cancer: Starfire
Reason: Cancer's are moody, so I'd say she's very moody sometimes, Starfire is very nice and caring.

Leo: Jericho
Reason: I know...
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We're all familiar with the term damsel in distress and we usually think about a female character that's tied to the train tracks 의해 a villain with a curly-q mustache, and has to be saved 의해 the dashing hero. I wonder where the idea first came from. We've always seen this with female characters because female damsels in distress have been around since the dawn of literature itself. However, during the mid 또는 late 1900's, we've discovered that there are male characters that have to constantly be saved as well. What's the term for male damsel's in distress? There isn't one, even though some people...
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I've actually been planning to do this for a while. I thought about doing this on 유튜브 but I kept on getting lazy about it, especially since it takes a while to get 비디오 uploaded on youtube. For some reason it's just a lot easier for me to make an 기사 here on 팬팝 and talk about it. Anyway, this list is based not only on the persons talent but on their personality as well. All of them have incredible personalities and some of them don't get as much 사랑 as they should. So keep in mind this is just my opinion, please comment, and enjoy. Also keep an eye out for an upcoming article...
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added by randomgirl3000
Source: tumblr