Anxiety issues? Depression? What's going on with me?

I don't know. I don't know what's going on.
Sometimes, not often but sometimes I get so overwhelmed with loneliness that I cry.
Sometimes, I just sit and stare for mins.
Sometimes, I think I'm worthless.
Sometimes, I dwell on all my past sin and think God is so far away.
Sometimes, I feel so alone and like I always will be.

When someone comes and shows even a little understanding I cling to them because I feel like I have to. I'm scared to lose that.
I have trust issues with boys because one once told me "all I wanted from 당신 was sex"

My cousin passed away in Aug so I'm still dealing with that and wondering if the sorrow of that has anything to do.
My mother abandoned me when I was a baby and I know I have abandonment issues. She left my brother though too and he seems to be fine.

I'm needy, I'm clingy, I'm emotional.
I over-think things. I overreact.
I'm 20 so I can't wait to have my own apartment but when I imagine what it will be like, I literally picture myself just sitting on the 침상, 소파 wrapped up in a blanket and staring at nothing.

I don't know if I have something wrong with me. Like a condition, but I don't want to think that I do. What if I'm just like this?

Also. . .I don't know if this effects how I am but my mom smoked when she was pregnant with me but not my brother. I don't think it was hard drugs but I don't know what it was.

코멘트 anything but please be nice.
 SarahCorine posted over a year ago
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랜덤 답변

MineTurtle5 said:
Wow. I've been there before, but not with those circumstances. I don't know exactly what 당신 feel, but 예수님 does. Turn to Him. He's waiting for 당신 to tell Him how 당신 feel, and He's waiting to show 당신 how much He loves you.
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posted over a year ago 
_Laugh_ said:
*sigh* Depression. We all have been depressed. Cuz, everybody has a private world where they can be alone. Believe me, I know how it feels like. I'm bullied at school, my mother hates me, and I 로스트 my best friend. It hurts. But when I was drowning, and nobody saw me struggle, 음악 was my only friend. So my 조언 is to listen to 음악 and ignore the world.
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posted over a year ago 
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Thank 당신 very much. I know everyone gets sad from time to time. It's normal, but I was starting to feel anxious all the time. And thank 당신 for the song. I like Eminem.
SarahCorine posted over a year ago
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Yay. Don't worry sweetie, it'll all be okay in the end. If its not okay, it's not the end
_Laugh_ posted over a year ago
SeeUV3 said:
What your feeling...I understand it I have depression I feel lonely I feel worthless my father abandoned me and I have terrible trust issues with guys . Trust me im clingy has well and really emotional and I over reacted to a point people think im insane . And I to feel like I will always be alone due to anxiety and I think 당신 may have depression cause that's what I have
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posted over a year ago 
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Sound like 당신 might just be my twin. Everything 당신 said, I could have said as well except for the father. It was my mother. First, I'm sorry that 당신 have depression. It hurts. Second, thank 당신 for sharing this with me. It makes me feel like I'm not alone. And third, what do 당신 do for it? Did 당신 have it checked 의해 a doctor 또는 take pills for it?
SarahCorine posted over a year ago
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i have to go to threapy its getting worse
SeeUV3 posted over a year ago
Sir_Kiwi said:
You're not the only person that deals with depression, don't worry. I don't think there's anything wrong with you. Everyone gets depressed at least once in their life.

당신 can maybe just sit it out and wait it through. 또는 if 당신 feel really depressed, smile. Smiling actually makes 당신 feel better.

If 당신 live through everything and your life actually gets better, everything will seem like a much 더 많이 happier place than before.
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posted over a year ago 
mizorewannabe said:
I don't know, either. I think there's depression within me.

Everything 당신 described is what happened to me, too. Except for everything mom and dudes.

My grandmother passed away 4/4/13.

This year. This 년 was supposed to be special. But she died of liver cancer. The doctors said that was the most painful cancer to go through, but in my opinion, all cancers are supposed to be painful. How did your cousin die?

To escape the pain, I try to be fun, ya know. Watch funny videos, say corny jokes; those kind of things.

Look! A funny video from mah 가장 좋아하는 anime!
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posted over a year ago 
springely said:
Go big 또는 go home, we're all gonna make it one day.
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posted over a year ago 
Otaku_Girl4890 said:
It's probably your past just now hitting you. I feel alone too, like no matter who I'm with, I'm still alone in the mind and body. I've learned to live with my feelings, excepting that I'll always feel alone. I have very high self confidence despite that though. 당신 might be suffering from depression.
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posted over a year ago 
Zeppie said:
I'm sorry about what has happened to 당신 :(

What you're dealing with is most definitely depression. Please, do get help. Keeping it all to yourself will do no good at all. Talk to a professional about it, book an appointment. As a last resort they can give 당신 medication to help.

To help distract 당신 from it, focus on your hobbies. Got any hobbies like drawing 또는 something like that? Focus on that and improve to keep your mind busy.

I can relate. My depression stemmed from my social anxiety which is still quite bad. I used to cry every 일 because I couldn't reach out and just plain communicate with people. I had no social life and I would just come 집 from school each 일 and lock myself in my room and cry... then come out for dinner, then go straight back to my room and cry myself to sleep every night. I got help and no it didn't 'cure' it, but it helped me gain perspective. What I need to focus on is dealing with my social anxiety, because that is really taking over my life :(

Just remember that no matter how alone 당신 feel, 당신 are still worth while. Life is going to kick 당신 down all the time and you're gonna think that no one cares and 당신 are alone. You're not. Just embrace and acknowledge that the way you're living right now is not mentally healthy, so talk to someone before it gets worse.

I know what you're going through, coming from an 18 년 old girl with social anxiety trying to survive university... it's difficult, but we'll get there :)
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posted over a year ago 
Book-Freak said:
당신 should go and talk to your doctor. My mum is going through this right now and she says 당신 should go and talk to your doctor. They will be able to prescribe ou with some anti-depressants and organise counciling for 당신 to deal with your depression and anxiety. It's okay, you're not alone, but 당신 need to deal with this. People can and will help 당신 and if 당신 ever need someone to talk to my 메시지함 is alway open.
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posted over a year ago 
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