So, these past couple months, I've picked up a few things. My story in a nutshell: I sat behind my crush in class, didn't start liking him until the last 월 또는 so of school, didn't get too many chances to talk to him due to the teacher's way of running the class, and I spent those last few weeks desperately trying to befriend him.
Anyways, here are some things I've learned from the whole experience.
1. Don't EVER pass up an opportunity to talk to ANYONE you're sitting near in class (doesn't matter if it's high school, college, work, whatever), and don't EVER take a conversation for granted. 당신 never know how desperate 당신 might be later on to be 프렌즈 with them. This was probably my biggest mistake; the first time my guy and I talked, I played along, no real issues, but I didn't think much of it. He just seemed like another guy, and I always waited for him to talk to me, and rarely took initiative to start a conversation myself 또는 to carry it on. Just thinking of what could've been, that sense of regret of not taking 더 많이 chances from the start really stings.
2. Don't be afraid! I know that saying may be overrated, but it's true. I used to be so intimidated 의해 the thought of trying to talk to him, just as most girls are with their mega crushes, but seriously, you've gotta take the chance, trust me. If 당신 get shot down, well, 당신 haven't really 로스트 anything, right? Better to regret things 당신 did than regret things 당신 didn't do.
3. Make eye contact. I know, scary, right? I used to always be super intimidated 의해 it, but trust me, you'll look WAY 더 많이 awkward if you're NOT making eye contact than if 당신 are. This doesn't just apply to conversation; even walking 의해 them in the hall 또는 if 당신 see them somewhere outside of class. I used to not make eye contact with my crush when I walked right 의해 him to my 좌석 every day. I feel like if I had done that from that start, that very simple gesture of looking at him and smiling, things would've been different. I would've given off a much 더 많이 friendly vibe.
4. Stay focused talking about THEM, NOT about yourself. We all, as humans, have a tendency to talk about ourselves a lot; it's our 가장 좋아하는 topic. However, it can bore people easily. Instead, try to keep asking 질문 about them and bouncing off that. But be careful not to make it an interrogation. :P
5. If the person if 프렌즈 with any of your friends, TALK TO YOUR 프렌즈 ABOUT IT. Once I revealed to our mutual 프렌즈 that I liked this guy, they helped me out so much to hang out with him and get to know him better. I wouldn't have even got half as far as I did if it weren't for them. If 당신 find out where he works, grab a friend and casually go visit.
6. I thought this sounded pathetic at first, but it really helps: try thinking of a few topics to bring up beforehand, even if 당신 have to write them down and review them a few times, just give it a shot. No one needs to know.
7. Now for 당신 high schoolers, if you're planning on going to prom, 또는 homecoming, etc. and desperately want to go with your crush like I did, please, take my advice: DO IT. As long as they're single, just go up and ask them. This is one of my biggest regrets. My guy was single for a while, until he decided t go with one of his friends, and I had the chance to ask him, but my fear of rejection and my fear of losing hope to befriend him stopped me from taking the chance. Prom was still fun and all, but I had to keep looking back at him with his 날짜 all night and it was a real downer. 당신 never know what might happen, so just do it, unless 당신 are absolutely 100% positive that they'll say no. And hey, if they do turn 당신 down, just smile and take it with dignity, so 당신 still have a chance to at least be friends. If you're not sure if 당신 want to go with them 또는 not, hey, I wasn't sure either, until I got there and saw him with his date, and my 프렌즈 with their dates. So just go for it.
8. Now, this is also very important. Even though it's crucial to take risks and try your best to talk to the person and all, it's also crucial to GIVE THEM THEIR SPACE. If they seem uninterested in the conversation you're trying to have, 또는 if they don't really try to carry it on, 또는 if 당신 can just see it in their face, just stop right there and give them a break. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't like 당신 또는 anything, but everyone needs space. If they're giving 당신 a signal, 당신 need to respect that. I had to deal with this, and it's not fun, but it DOESN'T mean 당신 should give up altogether. Just give them a 일 또는 two, and try again. I followed this motto: be friendly, not desperate.
9. If it's a situation like mine, where in class, 또는 even outside of class for that matter, they're always around their friends, and seem much 더 많이 interested in talking to them than with you, just accept it and respect it. Doesn't mean they're neglecting you, but guys especially, with their bro friends... it can be kinda difficult to talk to your guy crush in that situation. Just try to interact with all of them, but don't try too hard. And on your part, always always ALWAYS be sure that 당신 DON'T neglect your own 프렌즈 for your crush. I know that;s said a lot, but some things are much easier said than done. I used to kinda ditch my 프렌즈 a little 의해 taking off from that class to the class I had with him, just for a tiny bit 더 많이 time to possibly talk to him. Don't do it; doing things like that just isn't cool.
10. Lastly, have confidence and determination! It really shows if 당신 have it 또는 lack it. Have a positive mindset; don't ever get your hopes up too high, otherwise you'll be that much 더 많이 crushed if things don't go well. Instead, plan ahead for success 또는 failure, and be ready to accept either one. If it doesn't work out, it's okay. Just take chances, not too many, and try to have fun with it. 당신 never know what awesome result could come out of one simple 코멘트 또는 action.
Please note that I'm definitely no expert, not even close :P. But I have learned these things all from personal experience, some things came the easy way, some things the hard way. I'm still trying to apply these things into my own life. I'm not trying to preach 또는 lecture, but this is my 조언 that I have to offer. I hate how I didn't take certain chances while I still could, and I hate the thought of other people doing the same thing and feeling the regret that I feel. So, I guess that concludes my little ramble :P.
And thank 당신 to those of 당신 who gave me 조언 on my crush a little while back; 당신 know who 당신 are. :)
Anyways, here are some things I've learned from the whole experience.
1. Don't EVER pass up an opportunity to talk to ANYONE you're sitting near in class (doesn't matter if it's high school, college, work, whatever), and don't EVER take a conversation for granted. 당신 never know how desperate 당신 might be later on to be 프렌즈 with them. This was probably my biggest mistake; the first time my guy and I talked, I played along, no real issues, but I didn't think much of it. He just seemed like another guy, and I always waited for him to talk to me, and rarely took initiative to start a conversation myself 또는 to carry it on. Just thinking of what could've been, that sense of regret of not taking 더 많이 chances from the start really stings.
2. Don't be afraid! I know that saying may be overrated, but it's true. I used to be so intimidated 의해 the thought of trying to talk to him, just as most girls are with their mega crushes, but seriously, you've gotta take the chance, trust me. If 당신 get shot down, well, 당신 haven't really 로스트 anything, right? Better to regret things 당신 did than regret things 당신 didn't do.
3. Make eye contact. I know, scary, right? I used to always be super intimidated 의해 it, but trust me, you'll look WAY 더 많이 awkward if you're NOT making eye contact than if 당신 are. This doesn't just apply to conversation; even walking 의해 them in the hall 또는 if 당신 see them somewhere outside of class. I used to not make eye contact with my crush when I walked right 의해 him to my 좌석 every day. I feel like if I had done that from that start, that very simple gesture of looking at him and smiling, things would've been different. I would've given off a much 더 많이 friendly vibe.
4. Stay focused talking about THEM, NOT about yourself. We all, as humans, have a tendency to talk about ourselves a lot; it's our 가장 좋아하는 topic. However, it can bore people easily. Instead, try to keep asking 질문 about them and bouncing off that. But be careful not to make it an interrogation. :P
5. If the person if 프렌즈 with any of your friends, TALK TO YOUR 프렌즈 ABOUT IT. Once I revealed to our mutual 프렌즈 that I liked this guy, they helped me out so much to hang out with him and get to know him better. I wouldn't have even got half as far as I did if it weren't for them. If 당신 find out where he works, grab a friend and casually go visit.
6. I thought this sounded pathetic at first, but it really helps: try thinking of a few topics to bring up beforehand, even if 당신 have to write them down and review them a few times, just give it a shot. No one needs to know.
7. Now for 당신 high schoolers, if you're planning on going to prom, 또는 homecoming, etc. and desperately want to go with your crush like I did, please, take my advice: DO IT. As long as they're single, just go up and ask them. This is one of my biggest regrets. My guy was single for a while, until he decided t go with one of his friends, and I had the chance to ask him, but my fear of rejection and my fear of losing hope to befriend him stopped me from taking the chance. Prom was still fun and all, but I had to keep looking back at him with his 날짜 all night and it was a real downer. 당신 never know what might happen, so just do it, unless 당신 are absolutely 100% positive that they'll say no. And hey, if they do turn 당신 down, just smile and take it with dignity, so 당신 still have a chance to at least be friends. If you're not sure if 당신 want to go with them 또는 not, hey, I wasn't sure either, until I got there and saw him with his date, and my 프렌즈 with their dates. So just go for it.
8. Now, this is also very important. Even though it's crucial to take risks and try your best to talk to the person and all, it's also crucial to GIVE THEM THEIR SPACE. If they seem uninterested in the conversation you're trying to have, 또는 if they don't really try to carry it on, 또는 if 당신 can just see it in their face, just stop right there and give them a break. It doesn't necessarily mean they don't like 당신 또는 anything, but everyone needs space. If they're giving 당신 a signal, 당신 need to respect that. I had to deal with this, and it's not fun, but it DOESN'T mean 당신 should give up altogether. Just give them a 일 또는 two, and try again. I followed this motto: be friendly, not desperate.
9. If it's a situation like mine, where in class, 또는 even outside of class for that matter, they're always around their friends, and seem much 더 많이 interested in talking to them than with you, just accept it and respect it. Doesn't mean they're neglecting you, but guys especially, with their bro friends... it can be kinda difficult to talk to your guy crush in that situation. Just try to interact with all of them, but don't try too hard. And on your part, always always ALWAYS be sure that 당신 DON'T neglect your own 프렌즈 for your crush. I know that;s said a lot, but some things are much easier said than done. I used to kinda ditch my 프렌즈 a little 의해 taking off from that class to the class I had with him, just for a tiny bit 더 많이 time to possibly talk to him. Don't do it; doing things like that just isn't cool.
10. Lastly, have confidence and determination! It really shows if 당신 have it 또는 lack it. Have a positive mindset; don't ever get your hopes up too high, otherwise you'll be that much 더 많이 crushed if things don't go well. Instead, plan ahead for success 또는 failure, and be ready to accept either one. If it doesn't work out, it's okay. Just take chances, not too many, and try to have fun with it. 당신 never know what awesome result could come out of one simple 코멘트 또는 action.
Please note that I'm definitely no expert, not even close :P. But I have learned these things all from personal experience, some things came the easy way, some things the hard way. I'm still trying to apply these things into my own life. I'm not trying to preach 또는 lecture, but this is my 조언 that I have to offer. I hate how I didn't take certain chances while I still could, and I hate the thought of other people doing the same thing and feeling the regret that I feel. So, I guess that concludes my little ramble :P.
And thank 당신 to those of 당신 who gave me 조언 on my crush a little while back; 당신 know who 당신 are. :)
