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1) 당신 lose arguments with inanimate objects.

2) 당신 have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

3) Your job is interfering with your drinking.

4) Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

5) The back of your head keeps getting hit 의해 the toilet seat.

6) 당신 sincerely believe that alcohol is the elusive 5th 음식 group.

7) 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence? I think not!

8) Two hands and just one mouth - now THAT'S a drinking problem!

9) 당신 can focus better with one eye closed.

10) The car park seems to have moved while 당신 were in the pub.

11) You...
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posted by 16falloutboy
Ok, I've read an 기사 where a female teacher raped her male student, who was a teenager, he was 16 I believe? But anyway, and many 코멘트 stated where, "Oh it's alright for a women to rape a man because he likes sex." and many other comments. When I saw these, I got really pissed. Women are treated badly in life and they're being treated like they can't do anything wrong. Gender doesn't matter, rape is rape. I'm pretty sure a young man with no experience, wouldn't like a grown women raping them. The boy's mind would be traumatized...why do people think a women can do what she wants? So...
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posted by goatfacewwe
There was once a kid on here 의해 the name of Zackkem who had some pretty cool content on here. he had Like 상단, 맨 위로 ten 투표 and other awesome things but the main thing was that he was a HUGE 팬 of one Ariana Grande and I think that it was wrong for 팬팝 to Suspense him. So If u guys read this 기사 please Help Campaign to get him back anyway possible. Also he was a pretty cool guy to talk to. Also if u guys don't mind Please contact 팬팝 to ask what qualifies an account for suspension. Some of his 상단, 맨 위로 ten 투표 Included Fave Tv actor, Fave female artist, fave reality show,fave movie actor, fave reality star, and fave song.
posted by Tailsfan99
Frozen," the latest 디즈니 musical extravaganza, preaches the importance of embracing your true nature but seems to be at odds with itself.

The animated, 3-D adventure wants to enliven and subvert the conventions of typical 디즈니 princess 영화 while simultaneously remaining true to their aesthetic trappings for maximum merchandising potential. It encourages young women to support and stay loyal to each other—a crucial message when mean girls seem so prevalent—as long as some hunky potential suitors and adorable, wise-cracking creatures also are around to complete them.

It all seems so...
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posted by slenderman777
I Always liked the Mario creepypastas. they were good and might i add not that creepy....that all changed when.... i had the dream...so i went to 침대 i woke up and first thing. everyone was dead. my brothers. my sisters. my parents. 프렌즈 .random other people all dead. then out of no where Mario came out of nowhere. he started to say something. he said."survive my deadly maze and 당신 will live but fail and 당신 will die" i then was in a maze. walking what seemed like hours of no point of ending.at this point i was scared out of my mine.just then Mario Came at me and said "you failed my maze therefore 당신 must be dead" it was at this point i woke up Screaming. i was back in the real world. the end
posted by PuppyLover10009
These are all words, no kidding. Ran out of words... bye.
Q: What do elves learn in school?

A: The Elf-abet!

Q: What's the most 인기 wine at Christmas?
A: "I don't like sprouts" !

Q: If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?
A: Missletoe!

Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?
A: Because he had low elf esteem.

Q: Why does Santa have 3 gardens?
A: So he can ho-ho-ho.

Q: Where do polar bears vote?
A: The North Poll.

Q: What do 당신 get when 당신 십자가, 크로스 an archer with a gift-wrapper?
A: Ribbon hood.

Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter ?
A: Because it's to far to...
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Everybody tells me that it's so hard to make it
Its so hard to break in, there's no way to fake it
Everybody tells me that it's wrong what I'm feeling
I shouldn't believe in the dreams that I'm dreaming
I hear it every day, I hear it all the time
I'm never gonna amount to much
But they're never gonna change my mind, no!
Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know
Something I don't know, something I don't know
Tell me, tell me, tell me something I don't know
Something I don't know, something I don't know
How many inches in a mile, what it takes to make 당신 smile
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posted by JoannaVonDoom
Im sorry if this has been 게시됨 before
If not, do not give me credit

1. Sing the 배트맨 theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with 프렌즈 in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If 당신 have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours 의해 hooking a 캠코더 to your TV and then pointing it at the screen.

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all the flat...
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me-every one said the old house down the block was haunted *roll my eyes* no such thing as "haunted" so i told my friendz i am proving it its not "haunted"

THE 다음 일
i cant get in the house (sure duh yeah i was scared i was going in alone but i tried playing it strong) oh well cant get in well bye but right after that i forgot Chloe could open any door with a nail after that she pushed me in and slamed the door behind me

the house was so OLD & LAME & SMELLY !! and fucken large like wow HELLO i yelled ugh what was the point every time i took a step the floor creeked and every time it did i could hear a dark voice saying get..out

i tried not to yell so i ran up the steps and saw...the dead body of old man jons i screamed so loud i think the whole world heared me i had to step over the dead body to go past him i saw the dead body had a 칼, 나이프 in the chest i new somthing was wrong
posted by lexie2635
This is my first fanfiction.I hope 당신 like it. Please 코멘트 down below about what 당신 like, what 당신 don’t like, and what 당신 want to see next.Short chapter.

A penpal relationship is often used to practice 읽기 and 글쓰기 in a foreign language, to improve literacy, to learn 더 많이 about other countries and life-styles, and to make friendships. As with any friendships in life, some people remain penpals for only a short time, while others continue to exchange letters and presents life-long. Some penpals eventually arrange to meet face to face. Some pen pals even get married....
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posted by snowwolf2000
월 of birth:
Jan: I married
Feb: I switched lives with
March: I had 공식 만찬, 저녁 식사 with
April: I had a sleepover with
May: I drew a picture of
June: I threw a party with
July: I stalked
Aug: I went swimming with
Sept: I walked to school with
Oct: I went trick-or-treating with
Nov: I watched 아니메 with
Dec: I gave a present to

Day of birth:
1: a wolf
2: a werewolf
3: Bella Swan
4: Edward Cullen
5: SpongeBob
6: Squidward
7: Italy( from Hetalia)
8: Finn( from Adventure Time)
9: Marceline( from Adventure Time)
10: Santa clause
11: Mr. Krabs
12: Sandy
13: Grell( from Black Butler)
14: a banana
15: a monkey
16: a sock
17: Russia(...
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posted by TeddyGlitter

(Don't be offended 의해 my constant swearing, you're on the internet for God's sake. I also call all my 프렌즈 "bitches")

See that link up there? I joined that club because I think there are too many trolls on the internet. And while some trolls are just here for lols, most are very annoying and, on many cases, cyber-bullies.
Me and my cousins used to have our own group called the Invader Brigade, and this club reminds of our old group. So lets get this club up and running again! WHO IS WITH ME!?
posted by FlufflyHands
당신 now when we broke up I was like: "I WANT U BACK." Then I realized our relationship was like a CIRCUS. 당신 GIVE 사랑 A BAD NAME baby, just saying. Now whenever I see 당신 I just put on my POKER FACE. ONE TIME 당신 came to me like: "ONE 더 많이 NIGHT...?" And I was like: "WHAT I'VE DONE For 당신 I regret" than running away I scream back at him: "I hope 당신 DIE YOUNG!" Yeah well we didn't talk for awhile. 당신 attempt to get me back again and I was like: "dude, WE ARE NEVER EVER EVER GETTING BACK TOGETHER." Then I just walked away, awkward moment when. I see 당신 around town with your stupid friends,...
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Yeah, oh
I pass my reflection, it’s someone else
I see your invention and not myself
I turned into your perfect girl
A total stranger
Now I see and I don’t want to

Being 당신 when it’s all just an act
It’s overrated
The truth is I’m wanting me back
‘Cause I can’t take this
I gotta be who I am underneath
Who I gave up so you’d believe
Being 당신 when it’s all just an act
It’s overrated
So overrated

I let 당신 control me 또는 so 당신 thought
Don’t think that you’re perfect, you’re so messed up
I hid away the best of me
Too scared to notice
Now I do and I’m not going to

Being 당신 when it’s...
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posted by spongefan612
This is a long dream I had. I know I say, "Then" a lot, but can 당신 cut me some slack? 팬팝 isn't school.

My dream started out with being at my friend Gavin's house. It looked bigger than before. There was some party. I went to another room and someone was charging the laptop I just got and the same laptop I'm typing this dream on. I got it but unfortunately the person charging it said, "The internet isn't working right now." And I thought, "FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU." I went through a door and then my sister was there. She was wearing a bikini for no reason. She said hi and walked past me. After,...
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posted by flippy_fan210
He kills and kills but doesn't know why
it doesn't matter how hard he tries.
if 당신 say Vietnam he'll stab 당신 with a fork
if 당신 say tiger you're head won't work.
He can use fire, pencils and car gas
heck, he'll just use whatever he has.
You can't stop him no matter what
if 당신 call for help he'll stab 당신 in the butt.
Never run because 당신 know he'll catch you
he might torture 또는 just plain kill you.
Run for cover, 더 많이 like run for death
he'll fill your eyes with crystal meth.
It doesn't matter if 당신 run 또는 cry
either way you'll just plain die.
Almost anything can set him off
you better pray to god that...
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posted by Feathershine
The Crystal Cavern

Sitting silently in the dusk, it was unbearable. My eyes closed, they were clouded with sadness and anger. It rose in me, this was starting to shape depression in my sole.

"how?" I muttered to myself while tears started to stream down my face "why did this happen?"

Snow was starting to fall. I looked up, my eyes shimmering, the snow was falling lightly and quietly upon me and I felt less anger.

 "perfect timing" I muttered coldly. Anger was still imbedded in me, but there was less. I put thrust my hands onto my face. "everything in my life is all... Dramatic"

This life was not...
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posted by Musiclover456
when buying a ring...
if 당신 want a regular ring like nothing fancy and just a fake ring go for the cheapest cutest thing 당신 could find
when buying a ring...
and 당신 want something fancy then go with something made of solid gold 또는 solid silver and diamonds 또는 any type of gem but as long as the gem is real don't go with it if it isn't real and then go for the most expensive thing possible make 당신 boyfriend 또는 husband pay for it after words!
this is just my opinion don't go with it if 당신 don't like it okay but please do try to find something that 당신 like and not some cruddy piece of 정크 your husband found in a pone-shop okay go to a Jewry store 또는 something that isn't a pone 샵 okay
1. They are very weird people.
2. There are billions of them in the world, like 색깔 on the screen of your computer.
3. They will analyse conversations in layers.
4. 당신 will spend the 일 assembling furniture from IKEA.
5. They drink and eat all kinds of weird shit just because they like the packaging.
6. They hate each other.
7. You’ll come out the last out of the 영화 because 당신 have to see the full list of credits.
8. They cant change a light bulb 또는 without making a sketch.
9. They fuck up all the tables with their cutters.
10. They rather study the 페이 즐, 페이즐리, 페이 즐 리 pattern on your outfit than listen...
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