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List by thatguywashot posted over a year ago
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1. Smoke a pipe and respond to each point the professor makes 의해 waving it and saying, "Quite right, old bean!"
2. Wear X-Ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to focus the overhead projector.
3. Sit in the front row and spend the lecture filing your teeth into sharp points.
4. Sit in the front and color in your textbook.
5. When the professor calls your name in roll, respond "that's my name, don't wear it out!"
6. Introduce yourself to the class as the "master of the pan flute".
7. Give the professor a copy of The Watchtower. Ask him where his soul would go if he died tomorrow.
8. Wear earmuffs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to speak louder.
9. Leave permanent markers 의해 the dry-erase board.
10. Squint thoughtfully while giving the professor strange looks. In the middle of lecture, tell him he looks familiar and ask whether he was ever in an episode of Starsky and Hutch.
11. Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test. If the professor says no, rip the pages out of your textbook.
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Opinion by milorox18 posted over a year ago
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WARNING: MAY NEED TISSUES FOR THESE:

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl:Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy:No, this is fun.

Girl:No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy:Then tell me 당신 사랑 me.

Girl:I 사랑 you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can 당신 take off my 헬멧 and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the 다음 day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his 헬멧 so that she would live even if he died.
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Opinion by milorox18 posted over a year ago
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REASONS WHY GIRLS RULE:

1.We got off the 타이타닉 first

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character 또는 the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free 영화 ... (you get the point).

11. We can hug our 프렌즈 without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

12. We can hug our 프렌즈 without wondering if WE'RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
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Opinion by sarabeara posted over a year ago
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I originally got this in a forwarded text, and I thought I'd pass it along. The premise of it is just about girls and best 프렌즈 and how we're always there for each other no matter what.

Disclaimer: I did not create this! It's just a cute little poem I thought deserved to be shared :]


To my girls...
Here's to the shit we talk,
The guys we stalk,
The way we shop,
The laughs we can't stop.
The gossip we spill,
The looks that can kill.
To having each other's back,
Getting each other on the right track.
To the 다음 morning gettin' all the facts.
Drownin' in beers,
Spillin' the tears.
We'll stay together through the years.

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Opinion by werewolflover posted over a year ago
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저기요 this is werewolflover and vampiregirl 17.Check out her 프로필 please.This is another insane list.So here goes.
#1 stick your head in the toilet and start 노래 Thriller 의해 Micheal Jackson loud enough for people to hear.
#2 walk in subway sit in the middle of the floor and start sucking on your big fat toe.
#3 watch the Headless horseman and whenever a head falls off say,"poor baby did your head fall off?"
#4 everytime someone says"the"start laughing like a maniac.
#5 run around in circles and when someone asks about it say"building a 원, 동그라미 of protection from the evil giant rotten tomatoes buttox.
PLEASE 코멘트 AND RATE.
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Opinion by brooki posted over a year ago
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Do 당신 ever hate it when its 11:30 on a school night and 당신 cant go to sleep?


Do 당신 ever hate the guy who invented clocks cause it seems to go faster than its supposed to?


Do 당신 ever hate everything around you?


Do 당신 ever hate big-deal award shows that come on late so that 당신 end up being wide awake at 12, 1 o'clock in the morning?


Do 당신 ever hate waking up too dagum early for school?





sorry. im just really mad right now. i hate all of these things. at the moment.
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Opinion by dsgt5 posted over a year ago
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WHICH PATH
a path is a way 당신 choose to walk upon
paths are a huge sequence of delimas
당신 never know wich one to choose
당신 can expiriment with the evil one
the path that 당신 will soon regret and you
might come along some 프렌즈 that are negative
당신 will definitly come along some tough desisions
will regret every single step that 당신 wondered on
또는 당신 will deside the one that is a magical expirience
of your life and 당신 will be sattisfied that the one 당신 have chosen just remember which ever one 당신 just wait and wait and 당신 will soon see the journey begins
your 심장 will deside
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Opinion by werewolflover posted over a year ago
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Hey,it's werewolflover.you seemed to like my other 기사 like this so here's another one.I hope 당신 enjoy and please rate and comment.
#1 sit in your front yard and every time someone walks 의해 (even a dog) moo where they can hear.
#2 Have a 차 party with Mr.Wiggles.If anyone wals 의해 say "would 당신 like to 가입하기 us?"
#3 scream at everyone to hide because the 담홍색, 핑크 fuzzy bananas are taking over the world.
#4 go to a park/any large grassy area where people are,sit down and scream.
#5 Start coughing and then say "sorry my chipmunk,Fred was trying to get out of my stomach.Then say to Fred,be good 또는 I'm taking your DS away.
I personally think my first one was better,but what do ya think?
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Opinion by lilred96 posted over a year ago
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Mysterious love
-chapter six-

As we walked down the hall he looked like he wanted too say something but he didnt.
So I said"Is there somthing wrong,do I look bad 또는 somthing?"
no 당신 look beautiful dont ever think 당신 are not the prettyest thing in the world" He said
"I am sorry." He said...

"For what mathew?"I said
"For upsetting you." "You didnt dont worry" I said

의해 then we had reached the art room when the teacher said "Class 당신 will need a piece of paper."
We both sat down in our seats and took out a piece of paper and then the teacher said "I want 당신 to draw what ever 당신 feel in your heart.What ever makes 당신 happy and what ever makes 당신 sad."
I made it look like i didnt no what too draw but I new exacly what made me happy and what was taking over my heart...

When I finally drew a 원, 동그라미 that I planned too put my iner most secerts and dreams and hopes in.When mathew said "How is it coming?"
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Article by Ownzer493 posted over a year ago
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*walk**walk**walk**stop* "You Hear that?"
"It's..................Butter...............Time!"
"It's 버터 Time?"
"I guess."

"way.......way...........way..."

"way way way?"

"I dunno"

" Hey!It's Coming from over here!"

"Penut......Time!....Butter.....Time! Penut 버터 젤리 Time Penut Butt 젤리 Time!"

"WHAT THE HECK OMG WTF PWN DA NOOB!!!!!!!"

*brow raised*

*sound of pistol*

*Banana Pain*

"Oh Crap"

"HE KILLED 바나나 MAN!"

"ITS PENUT 버터 젤리 TIME!!!"

"no he's alive"

"YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!


THE END
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Opinion by Lola90210 posted over a year ago
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GOD HATES ME

Chapter 1

        God Hates Me.
-ate some fries.
-Went to bed.

Chapter 2

        I am in a better mood today because I did my prayers and God spoke to me and he promised to put me in a group with my friends.
God Loves Me.

Chapter 3

        God must die! He is being so unreasonable!!! I asked him to put me in a group with my 프렌즈 but does he listen??! No! God is a bitch!
-I'm an 이모 from now on
-Went to bed

Chapter 4

        God is being unreasonable again but this time with Meredith! Why does God hate us? I wish this 질문 to be answered.
-Had some 물고기 fingers
-Had a bath
-Chopped finger off
-Went to A & E
-Went to bed.

Chapter 5
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Opinion by lilred96 posted over a year ago
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Mysterious love

-chapter five-

As we were walking down the stairs too the lunch room he said"So how was 읽기 and math?"
"Boring"I said he kinda smiled and said "Well..." but trailed off
I was going too ask why when rebecca came up and looked at us she sort of examined us ,I guess is a better word.She said"June do 당신 no if the librarian has a nother copy of that geometertry book I need it for something?"I just said "Umm I dont think she has one" When mathew said "I bet i have a copy at home,you can borrow"
I looked at him wondering why he was 읽기 it in the 도서관, 라이브러리 when i came in too look for it.As much as I wanted too no I didnt ask it is nice too have a mystery too think about when 당신 are bored 또는 lonley.

Then rebecca said "Ok thanks"
Rebecca was a nice girl,she had long beautiful brunette hair and brown eyes that were the sweetest thing.She stude about 5'4 which was about 1 inch taller than me.
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Article by DontCare posted over a year ago
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코멘트 about wether its good 또는 not !!!!! ~

♥♥
♥♥♥
♥♥♥♥
♥♥♥♥♥
♥♥♥♥♥♥

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Opinion by bubble_babe posted over a year ago
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xD
Ok Frist i have to do all this 랜덤 crap then i can post them sooooo read the RANDOM!



()_() Help this buuny
(+.+) take over the
() () WORLD! and if 당신 dont.
He'll kill you!


yhul;op - my cat tryed to say 'hi' xD


Omg my bunny fell asleep in my 고양이 litter box xD XD

Ummmmm what else, ou, my lil sis is trying to ride my horse........>:( NO1 RIDES BEAKEY OTHER THEN MEH! SHE IS GOING DOWN!

God other then me being pissed right now and waiting to post 랜덤 pics what else should i do?

Uhhhhhh......The onley normale 일 i had was a monday.

my cat eats dog food

monkeys ate Miley C.

Lets see if i can post the pics now.
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Opinion by lilred96 posted over a year ago
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mysterious 사랑

-chapter four-

He said "Hello June" in a com voice...my 심장 melted 의해 the sound of his soft voice,I wanted him too talk too me all day,but I new we had too get too class soon and I would have too wait two hours too see him again.So then I said "Hi mathew" I could here the classic 피아노 playing a soft 사랑 song in my head.He handed me my jacket,and said"you forgot it yesterday"
I said "Oh thanks for returning it"and smiled a little bit he moved from my locker so I could put my bag up.Then he said "What class are 당신 headed too?"
"Reading" I said
He put his hands in his pockets and looked down and had a wored look on his face he looked up again and said "Well can i walk 당신 there?"
"Umm okay" I said and smiled again


We keeped walking when he looked up and said "I like 당신 hair"
I kinda laughed to my self and said "Thank 당신 I like yours too"
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Opinion by Bella_Swan3 posted over a year ago
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Please note that this is merely my perception on this. 당신 can have your opinion, I'll have mine.

We all know the modern 디즈니 stars are completely whacked and are SO not role models. But what about the old school Disney?

The Little Mermaid. Ariel clearly states that she's sixteen in the first film. The 초 movie claims to be ten years later, the perfect age for Melody, her daughter. Is 디즈니 promoting teenage pregnancy? Promoting underage marriage? And the supposed "love" she felt was only worship lust, hardly the basis for a healthy relationship. What message does this send to young girls, who will become teenagers with unrealistic expectations?

디즈니 princesses: They're two dimensional, non realistic, poorly developed characters who demean women. This is the twenty first century, and women are being given 더 많이 rights than ever before, and yet little girls are being raised to believe that men are superior and will save them. I can tell 당신 this is far from the truth. In many cultures today there are still gender inequality issues, where women are given few rights.
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Opinion by lilred96 posted over a year ago
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Mysterious love
-chapter three-


Went he sat down I got a little scared.My stomach felt weried like it was trying too jump out.He was there I wanted too say hi but I just could'nt get it out.so I was just sitting there a nervous wreck chewing on the 상단, 맨 위로 of my eraser I kept wanting too look at him becuse I could feel him looking at me.finaly I snuke a peek he was staring at me but when he seen me looking he quickly looked down at his notebook.Then I looked down at my blank paper when the teacher said "Ok class dont forget too read chapter 8 in your book" I took my text book out of my new 책상, 데스크 and got my binder and started out of the class room when behind me I seen summer and elisabeth looking my way and laughing at me,I really didnt care why.


After that I went too my locker and put my history book away.When I seen him walking down the hall.I looked at him I could not help my self.Then he looked at me for a while too and then had a little smile escape and kept walking.
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Opinion by lilred96 posted over a year ago
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Mysterious love

-chapter two-


That night he was all I could think about.Him and his eyes.After a few 시간 I fell asleep and woke up 의해 the sound of my alarm,then I heared my father call me over and over i guess I had fallen asleep again.Then I got up and threw on a 셔츠 that had some sort of 제목 on it I could not read because it was worn out.Then I went too my dresser too find some pants after I put my old 컨버스 on I went down stairs too see my father sitting there drinking coffee."dad what are 당신 doing here aren't 당신 supposed too be a work?"
"no i am staying here too have breakfast with you" he said
I wanted too ask why but I was afraid too ask why because I thought it would hurt his feelings,so I just sat down and ate my eggs and toast.We didnt say any thing really just that It was a 100% chance of rain so after about 30 miniutes I went and got my 코트 and went out side too start my car.
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Article by prettystar posted over a year ago
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Hi Mommy!
I am only 3/4 of an inch long,
But I have all my organs.
I 사랑 the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it,
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your 심장 beat
Is my 가장 좋아하는 lullaby.

월 Two.

Mommy,
Today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If 당신 could see me
당신 could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my 집 though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

월 Three.

당신 know what Mommy,
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes 당신 happy.
I always want 당신 to be happy.
I don't like it when 당신 cry.
당신 sound so sad.
It makes me sad too,
And I cry with 당신 even though
당신 can't hear me.

월 Four.

Mommy,
My hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
But I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
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Opinion by rolie1 posted over a year ago
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Supports your body’s antioxidant and nutritional needs.





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MonaVie™ features a delicious blend of the Brazilian açai berry—one of nature's 상단, 맨 위로 superfoods—and 18 other body-beneficial fruits. This Balance-Variety-Moderation approach to nutrition delivers powerful antioxidants and phytonutrients to help fight free radicals and maintain your body's 사무용 겉옷, 전반적인 health.

The Premier Açai Blend™
MonaVie's delicious blend of body-beneficial fruits is designed to nourish your body with powerful antioxidants and nutrients.

Açai, white grape, apple, acerola, aronia, purple grape, cranberry, passion fruit, prune, kiwi, blueberry, wolfberry, camu camu, pomegranate, lychee fruit, pear, banana, cupuaçu, and bilberry.

Key Benefits
Offers potent antioxidant protection against free radicals.
Features a variety of key nutrients for optimal health.
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Opinion by TOTALIzzyluver posted over a year ago
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K so me and my sister are wrting a book and we really want it to be published 또는 made into a tv show, but we want the tv thing 더 많이 so me and her stayed up ALL night and thought up of an opening 4 the first episode. so i'll write it and PLEASE tell me wat 당신 think and if you'd want to here 더 많이 또는 see this on your tv, so here it is:
(opens in on 3 sleeping teen girls) (Izzy wakes up and does jumping jacks, splits, and a flip)
"Ella! I NEED my slingshot!!" Izzy said to Ella. "No! Your not flinging Alyssa with rocks again!" Ella said. "Yeah! i still have bruces for that!" Alyssa said. "Well Im not going to fling rocks at Alyssa! I am going to fling my peas at the cheerleaders!" Izzy explained grabing her school bag. "And...?" Ella said. "... and a couple at Ayssa." Izzy admited. "Thats not a very good thing to do being the new kid!" Alyssa said. "Yeah well I'll do in the future anyway." Izzy said heading down stares. "She's got a point." Alyssa said. "Yup." Ella said nodding her head up and down and followed her down stares. (Ella and Izzy have two brothers and together they're quadurplet set) "Hello, quadurplet sisters!" Lucas and Payton said at the same time. "Good...
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List by DontCare posted over a year ago
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Soooooo......... got it from a freind who got it from his friend who got it from another friend who got it from ..... blah! just read it, and 코멘트 =P


Professors of different subjects define the same word in different ways:

Prof. of Computer Science:
A 키스 is a few bits of 사랑 compiled into a byte.

Prof. of Algebra:
A 키스 is two divided 의해 nothing.

Prof. of Geometry:
A 키스 is the shortest distance between two straight lines.

Prof. of Physics:
A 키스 is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart.

Prof. of Chemistry:
A 키스 is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts.

Prof. of Zoology:
A 키스 is the interchange of unisexual salivary bacteria.

Prof. of Physiology:
A 키스 is the juxtaposition of two orbicular ors muscles in the state of contraction.

Prof. of Dentistry:
A 키스 is infectious and antiseptic.
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List by DontCare posted over a year ago
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I took this from a friend who took it from someone else who most likely took it from someone else and so on. XD, I thought a little list of phobias would be fun.

x = Somewhat
xx = Greater
xxx = Huge enormous crippling OMG! fear

A
[x] Achluophobia - Fear of darkness.
[ ] Acrophobia - Fear of heights.
[ ] Agliophobia - Fear of pain.
[ ] Agoraphobia - Fear of open spaces 또는 crowds.
[ ] Aichmophobia - Fear of needles 또는 pointed objects.
[x] Amaxophobia - Fear of riding in a car.
[ ] Androphobia - Fear of men.
[ ] Anginophobia - Fear of angina 또는 choking.
[ ] Anthrophobia - Fear of flowers.
[ ] Anthropophobia - Fear of people 또는 society.
[ ] Aphenphosmphobia - Fear of being touched.
[ ] Arachnophobia - Fear of spiders.
[xx] Arithmophobia - Fear of numbers.(Numbers can be dangerous!)
[ ] Astraphobia - Fear of thunder and lightening.
[ ] Ataxophobia - Fear of disorder 또는 untidiness.
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Guide by LinaJC posted over a year ago
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~In Tokyo, a bicycle is faster than a car for most trips of less than 50 minutes!

~Your body is creating and killing 15 million red blood cells per second!

~There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos!

~The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows. It was the fashion in Renaissance Florence to shave them off!

~Every 일 20 banks are robbed. The average take is $2,500!

~The most 인기 first name in the world is Muhammad!

~Until the nineteenth century, solid blocks of 차 were used as money in Siberia

~Most lipstick contains 물고기 scales!

~It's illegal to drink 맥주 out of a bucket while you're sitting on a curb in St. Louis!

~Clinophobia is the fear of beds!

~The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds


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Opinion by lilred96 posted over a year ago
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mysterious love


-chapter one-

It was my first 일 of 11th grade.My alarm clock went off I stayed in 침대 for a little while I didnt want too get up.But after a miniute 또는 two I just got up.I went too my closet and pick out some clothes really it was just what I seen first.After I dressed my self I went down stairs too see my father in the 부엌, 주방 makeing coffee.Soon he would be on his way too work, just like every day.My father is a lawyer for the town of Bartonville,Arkansas. Every body liked him thoughs who didnt did not know him very well,but he is very queit kinda like me.Him and my mother divorced when I was younger.I have an older sister some where but non of my family knows where last I heard she had got married 4 times,but she has been married too this one for a least 7 years now.
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