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posted by XxLalasaysxX
Here are my list of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let 당신 know now i got alot of these from the 유튜브 channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything 또는 eating anything 당신 might spit it 또는 something.)

#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.

#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)

#3 Why was the 비, 빗자루 late to work?
It overswept!

#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the 만, 베이 they'd be bagels.

#5 What's Michelle Obama's 가장 좋아하는 vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)

#6 Why does the 버섯 have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)

#7 What do 당신 call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)

#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

#9 What do 당신 call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!

#10 How do 당신 make an octopus giggle ten times?
당신 give him ten-tickles (tenticles)

#11 How do 당신 make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!

#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!

#13 What's a chicken's 가장 좋아하는 composer?
Bach!

#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between 당신 and me man, something smells." (Your nose)

#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."

#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."

#17 Why can't 당신 hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)

#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher said it was a piece of cake.

#19 Why did the 토마토 blush?
It saw the 샐러드 dressing.

#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)

#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)

#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.

#23 How do 당신 know if it's raining 고양이 and dogs?
당신 step in a poodle (puddle)

#24 How do 당신 know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)

#25 How do 당신 get 피카츄 on a bus?
당신 포켓몬스터 (pok 'em on)

#26 Why can't 당신 dress with 피카츄 in the room?
He'll 피카츄 (peek at you)

#27 What do 당신 call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)

#28 How do get holy water?
당신 boil the hell out of it!

#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD

#30 Why didn't the skeleton 십자가, 크로스 the road?
He didn't have the guts to.

#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)

#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)

#33 What do 당신 call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator

#34 What's 담홍색, 핑크 and fluffy?
담홍색, 핑크 fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
담홍색, 핑크 fluff holding it's breath.

#35 What happens when 당신 drink 7 coca colas?
당신 burp 7up

#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.

#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!

#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.

#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)

#40 what did the 물고기 say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!

#41 Why can't 당신 trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)

Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope 당신 liked them. Make sure 당신 check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
 PewDiePie
PewDiePie
Jetzt geht's los Freunde
Hier ist Markus Becker und die Mallorca Cowboys und das rote Pferd

Wir singen zusammen
Da hat das rote Pferd sich einfach umgekehrt
und hat mit seinem Schwanz die Fliege abgewehrt
Die Fliege war nicht dumm,
sie machte summ,summ,summ
Und flog mit viel Gebrumm
um's rote Pferd herum

lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala
lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalalalalalalalala

Ok Freunde,
das war nicht schlecht für 굴, 덴 Anfang
Aber da geht noch was
Seit ihr gut drauf? Jaaa
Habt ihr lust zu feiern? Jaaa
Dann macht euch bereit und singt mit uns zusammen


Die Fliege...
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posted by karpach_14
Bored? Need something to spice up your day? Why not annoy the living shit out of someone 당신 love? Here are a few suggestions.

1. Go to the library. Every 15 minutes, go up to the same guy and joke, "Working hard 또는 hardly working?"

2. At the dentist, start screaming as soon as 당신 open your mouth.

3. Stand in front of the TV while your dad is watching a big game.

4. Every 30 분 또는 so, call your friend who is babysitting and breathe into the phone.

5. Scrape your ring 또는 your nails on the blackboard 다음 time you're asked to do a problem at the board.

6. 다음 음악회, 콘서트 당신 go to, yell out "Mmmbop!"...
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added by DeiJambastion
Source: Dei
Famous Newgrounds content creator, also known as Arin Hanson from the let’s play channel Game Grumps, was once a prolific animator and considered one of the biggest. If 당신 don’t know Arin as an animator, you’d be forgiven for that. Arin Hanson’s old career has been buried and forgotten, but hey, times change right…. Right…. Right?! Hello, boys and girls. Welcome to another episode of Content Cop. Idubbbz here with the new rant article. I ranted before about David Cage and his creeping abilities, but now it’s time to talk about something else. It’s time to hit closer to home....
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added by SilentForce
added by SilentForce
added by BlueDopamine
Source: 망가
added by TheLefteris24
A 빠른, 스위프트 lunge at your soul but it's all in the mind
If 당신 want to stuff me in a suit I'm sure you'll find
That the things that'll creep ya are sure to beat ya
Got to stay alive 또는 they're going to meet ya

10 Rooms 5 vents and no doors at all
Not even a flashlight and no time to stall
Delay for a moment and through the vents they'll crawl
Almost dead, every sound I dread, and I see him in the hall.

YOYOYOYO WHAT'S UP BRO!?
YOU'RE THE NEW GUY, HIGH FIVE, TOO SLOW!
JUST LIVE FIVE NIGHTS, EACH ONE'S DIFFICULTY'S GREATER
YOU GOT THE BASICS DUDE, ALRIGHT SEE 당신 LATER!

So night one, here we go,...
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added by KataraLover
added by DanDan211985
Source: DanDan211985
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의해 michaeljacksonhoo42
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OMFO (OH MY FLYING OSTRAGE) ITS SOOOOOOO FUCKIN FUNNY
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