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These are our rules! Please note ... these are
all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
it down. We need it up, 당신 need it down. 당신 don't hear us
complaining about 당신 leaving it down.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what 당신 want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable 답변 to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if 당신 want help solving it.
That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months 이전 is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all 코멘트 become null and void after 7 days.

1. If 당신 won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect
us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If 당신 think you're fat, 당신 probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the
ways makes 당신 sad 또는 angry, we meant the other one.

1. 당신 can either ask us to do something 또는 tell us how 당신 want it
done. Not both. If 당신 already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever 당신 have to say
during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach,
for example, is a fruit, not a color. 호박 is also a fruit. We have
no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and 당신 say "nothing," we will act
like nothing's wrong. We know 당신 are lying, but it is just not worth
the hassle.

1. If 당신 ask a 질문 당신 don't want an answer to, expect an
answer 당신 don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything 당신 wear is fine.
Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless 당신 are prepared
to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, 또는 monster
trucks.

1. 당신 have enough clothes.

1. 당신 have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

1. Thank 당신 for 읽기 this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
침상, 소파 tonight, but did 당신 know men really don't mind that, it's like
camping.
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posted by McDreamyluva
Here's the famous 'Best Divorce Letter' 의해 Dan to Connie, pretty hilarious, definitely a must read! xD



Dear Connie,

I know the counselor said we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore.

The 일 당신 left, I swore I'd never talk to 당신 again but that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first on to make contact. In my fantasies, it was always 당신 who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that. But now I see that my pride’s cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you....
continue reading...
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