Theme song >>>> link

Taxi Ponies: *Driving taxi cabs to the station*

Ponies On The Rails

Starring

Pierce Hawkins "Hawkeye" From SeanTheHedgehog

Snowflake & Orion From Alinah09

Metal Gloss From DragonAura15

Railway Pony: *Driving freight train across a bridge going over the train tracks at the station.*
Metal Gloss: *Drives freight train under bridge*
Pony: *In the station, buying a ticket. As soon as he gets the ticket, he runs across the platform, and boards his train.*
Hawkeye: *Preparing train for departure*
Stylo: *Looking at orders on paper*
Hawkeye: *Blows horn twice*
Signal Pony: *Turns signal green*
Hawkeye: *Drives train out of the station.*

Also starring Stylo From Jimmythedragon

NocturnalMirage from NochurnalMirage

Percy, Jeff, Mike, Nicole, Stephanie, and Pete from SeanTheHedgehog

Dan from Someonebutnoone

Episode 111

Pete: *Signing papers* This is practically the only thing I do here. The railroad constantly sends me so many damn papers, that I have to spend all my time signing them in this fucking office.

---

Metal Gloss: Hi Pierce.
Hawkeye: Hey.
Stylo: What? No hi for me?
Hawkeye: Hi Stylo.
Stylo: Not from you.
Metal Gloss: Sorry Stylo, I'm just upset right now.
Hawkeye: Still upset about 844?
Metal Gloss: Yeah. Renumbering that engine just doesn't seem right. It's the only engine we've had that's never been retired from service, and renumbering it feels like desecration.

---

Metal Gloss: *Waiting for ponies to come onto the platform*
Hawkeye: No one so far.
Metal Gloss: I guess nopony wants to travel to North Platte.
Ponies: *Coming onto the platform from the station*
Hawkeye: 또는 so we thought.
조랑말 49: Hey, they renumbered the steam engine.
조랑말 93: This is cool.
Ponies: *Taking pictures*
Metal Gloss: They actually like it.
Hawkeye: I told 당신 so.

Episode 112

Song: link

A 조랑말 wearing a black hoodie walked into the station, and passed a door that said employees only.

Hooded Pony: *Running upstairs, and crossing a bridge that goes over the train tracks*
Railroad Pony: *Slowly driving an electric engine while blowing the horn*
Hooded Pony: *Crosses the entire bridge, and gets to an area where there are three electric engines*
Guard 54: Hey, 당신 can't be here.
Hooded Pony: *Pulls out a revolver, and shoots the three guards*
Guards: What was that?! *Ten of them are running outside from a huge building*
Hooded Pony: *Opens a huge door into the building behind the electric engines. Inside is a diesel, 다음 to the track that the electric engine is on*
Guards: Freeze! *Pointing 총 at the hooded pony* Drop your weapon.
Hooded Pony: *Drops down, rolls over, and takes cover behind a support beam, while shooting 더 많이 bullets at the guards*

Three guards were shot down

Guard 63: Keep shooting! *Shoots at the hooded pony, but his bullets keep missing*
Hooded Pony: *After reloading the gun, he shoots 더 많이 guards, using the last one to hit two of them at the same time*

After that was over, the hooded 조랑말 climbed into the diesel, started it, and drove it towards the electric engine.

Hooded Pony: *Passes the electric engine, switches onto it's track, couples up to it, and pulls it away*

더 많이 guards arrived, but it was too late.

Guard 42: Fuck!
Guard 99: We're going to get fired for this. Aren't we?
Guard 42: I don't think so.

The press soon heard about it, and started making newspapers with the headline, Railway Engines Stolen. These newspapers were sent all around Equestria.

---

Episode 113

Hawkeye, and Stylo were driving a freight train down Sherman 언덕, 힐 from Laramie. They were five 분 early.

Stylo: Five 분 ahead of schedule.
Hawkeye: And the ponies we're delivering this freight to may pay us extra.

But then, their engine stalled.

Stylo: That doesn't sound good.
Hawkeye: Aw come on! *Tries to start the engine*
Stylo: Train 954, our front engine has stalled, and we're coasting down Sherman 언덕, 힐 towards the train yard. We may be late.
Hawkeye: No, we better not be late. I won't be late with my trains, ever. *Tries to start the engine*
Snowflake: Cheyenne to 954, Percy, and Jeff are on their way to take a look, and repair the engine.
Stylo: Ten-4. Thank you.
Hawkeye: I hope they get here soon.

They did, and they quickly fixed the engine. Hawkeye, and Stylo were on their way again, but now they were 1 분 early.

Stylo: Hey. We're still early.
Hawkeye: *Starts the engine* Let's try to stay early with this train. *Drives the train*
Snowflake: *Waiting outside the tower*
Hawkeye: *Stops the train 다음 to Snowflake's tower*
Stylo: *Gets out to uncouple the engines from the freight train*
Snowflake: *Walks over to Hawkeye in the train* Hawkeye, you're late.
Hawkeye: GODDAMN IT!

---

Song: link

At night, Hawkeye walked to a bar. Several neon lights were on above, and in front of him. He thought the lights were too bright when he got to the bar.

Hawkeye: *Covering his eyes as he walks in*
Ponies: *Looking at Hawkeye*
Hawkeye: Hey, someone needs to fix the neon sign. 당신 want your customers to go blind, and get lost?
Bartender: The sign is fine the way it is pal. What do 당신 want?
Hawkeye: *Gives the bartender a twenty dollar bill* As many beers as possible.
Bartender: Right then. *Goes to get the drinks while looking up* Dear lord, please help this stallion.
조랑말 85: *Walks up to Hawkeye* Hey, you've been up here several times.
Hawkeye: No shit.
조랑말 85: 당신 came up here eleven years 이전 when they scrapped a steam locomotive, 당신 dropped 의해 in 1960 when your friend was in the hospital, and now you're back. What's buggin' 당신 this time?
Hawkeye: Do 당신 know how it feels when you're biggest accomplishment goes down the drain?
조랑말 85: 예수님 christ, what the-
Hawkeye: Look. I'm not in the mood to talk. If 당신 fuck off, I'll let 당신 have five of my beers.
조랑말 85: Mh, okay.
Bartender: *Arrives with forty beers* Here 당신 are Mr. Hawkins.
Hawkeye: Thanks.
조랑말 85: *Taking five beers, and walks away* 저기요 Off, can I fuck you?
Hawkeye: Not what I meant, but at least it worked.

---

Hawkeye: *Can't open the front door* It's locked. Oh well. *Kicks the windows on the doors* Now there has to be someway to unlock this. *Reaching for the lock, and gets it* There we go. *Opens the door*

Episode 114

Pete: *Signing papers in his office*
Percy: *Walks into the office* Sir, can I talk to you?
Pete: What is it Percy?
Percy: I invited a group of, uh... Somethings to 가입하기 us sir.
Pete: Well, where are they?
Audience: *Laughing*
Percy: *Pointing at you, the reader* Over there sir.
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: In all my time, I've never seen a human like that.

---

Snowflake: *Turns around to look at Stylo* You've been neglecting me for quite some time now. I don't know about you, but I think our 사랑 interest in each other has declined.
Stylo: That was a mistake on my half, I will admit, however, we can make things right.
Snowflake: Yeah right. Unless 당신 get me a diamond necklace, and a diamond ring, I will not 사랑 당신 anymore, let alone speak to you. 당신 have five days to get it for me.
Stylo: Don't 당신 think that's demanding?
Audience: *Laughing*
Snowflake: Not if 당신 사랑 me.
Stylo: Anything 당신 say. I'll get to it right away. *Leaves the tower*

---

Song: link

Two days later at a bar

Stylo: *Drunk, resting his head on the counter in front of him* Oh fuck!!!
조랑말 85: *Arrives* Hey.
Stylo: *Picks up his head, and looks at the 조랑말 to his right*
조랑말 85: I've heard of you.
Stylo: I'm sure 당신 have, now if 당신 don't mind, I'm trying to have a hangover.
Audience: *Laughing*
조랑말 85: Somepony named Pierce Hawkins told me about you.
Stylo: Pierce came here?
조랑말 85: That's right. I've seen him coming here on a few occasions ever since 1952.
Stylo: That's the same 년 I moved into this town from Los Angeles. Wait, no, I moved here in '53.
조랑말 85: It seems that your drink is starting to take effect.
Audience: *Quietly laughing*
조랑말 85: Pierce would talk about 당신 sometimes. He says you're a hard working 조랑말 that doesn't crack under pressure. What happened to you?
Stylo: I cracked under pressure.
Audience: *Quietly laughing*
조랑말 85: Son of a bitch.
Stylo: What's wrong with you?
조랑말 85: I was lied to!
Audience: *Laughing*
조랑말 85: *Leaves in anger*

Episode 115

Song: link

Orion: *Dancing on 상단, 맨 위로 of a freight train*
Dan: Will 당신 get yourself, and that record player off of the bloody train?!
Mike: It doesn't seem to be workin' lad. He ain't payin' attention to us.
Pete: *Arrives* What is this all about?
Dan: *Points to Orion* You're better off asking him sir.
Pete: Orion! Get the fuck down from there!!
Orion: *Turns off the record player, and climbs down* Yes?
Pete: Don't ever do that again.
Orion: Does this mean I'm fired?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: No. You'll never get fired, so get used to it!
Orion: I'll prove 당신 wrong Pete!

---

Orion: *Gets an A-B set of E9's, and a U25B coupled up to his train*
Mike: *Standing 다음 to Orion's train* 당신 have anymore plans on getting fired?
Orion: For the moment, no.
Mike: 당신 better think of something, 또는 else 당신 may have to quit, and the government will kill you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Orion: I think I already know that Gonzo.
Audience: *Laughing*
Orion: My signal's green. Time to go. *Drives his train out of the yards*
Mirage: *Arrives* What were you, and Orion talking about?
Mike: About him thinking of a way to get fired, before he's forced to quit, and get killed 의해 the government.
Mirage: 당신 actually believe him?
Audience: *Laughing*
Mirage: I swear Gonzo, 당신 get more, and 더 많이 retarded every time I see you.

---

Orion: Tada! *The train crashes, and blows up behind him*
Audience: *Laughing*
Dan: 당신 fucking bastard.
Orion: What?! How else am I supposed to get fired?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: ORION!!!!!!!
Orion: *Excited* Here it comes!!!!
Pete: *Arrives, and is very angry* 당신 caused another accident.
Orion: Of course I did. How else am I supposed to get fired around here?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: Well instead of firing you, 당신 know what I'm gonna do?
Orion: If you're not gonna 불, 화재 me, I don't wanna know.
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: Too bad. I am going to have 당신 work for ten weeks without pay, and get 당신 arrested.
Orion: Why is it so difficult to get fired on purpose?!?!
Audience: *Laughing*
Mike: Nice try Stardust.

Episode 116

When Stylo spun the key five times, the plane wouldn't start. Stylo had to spin the key ten 더 많이 times in order to get it started.

Black Tuesday: There we go.
Stylo: Chocks away!
Stargazer: There are no chocks. Never needed any with this terrain!
Stylo: Right! *To Hawkeye* Meet me at the airport on Evan's Avenue!
Hawkeye: All right! I know where that is!!!
Stylo: *Makes the plane 옮기기 forward, passing his car*
Hawkeye: *Drives to Cheyenne International Airport*

Song: link

Stylo turned on the radio, and was enjoying the music.

Stylo: I didn't even know an airplane this old had a radio inside. Stargazer must have put it in.

It did not take long for Stylo to reach the airport. Once he got there, he put the plane in a hangar, and walked to Hawkeye in his car.

Stylo: *Hears the song on the radio in his car, as he sits down 다음 to Hawkeye* Hey, I was just listening to that song.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hawkeye: What a coincidence. *Drives away from the airport*

---

Song: link

다음 day, Hawkeye and Stylo were driving a freight train up Sherman Hill.

Stylo: *Looking out the window*
Hawkeye: Are 당신 trying to find them?
Stylo: Yeah. They said they would be here. *Hears the airplane* I hear them.
Stargazer: *Flying over the train, and then to the right. He, and Black Tuesday wave to Stylo, and Hawkeye*
Hawkeye & Stylo: *Wave hello*
Hawkeye: Is he still letting 당신 borrow the plane from time to time?
Stylo: Oh yeah. Sometimes, he even borrows a friend's plane, and we fly together, to any place we want.
Hawkeye: That's good Stylo. I'm glad 당신 have fun with him.

Episode 117

Song: link

Hawkeye: This casino looks brand new.
Stylo: That's because it is.
Audience: *Laughing*
Gambling Ponies: *Playing Bridge*
Waiter: Would any of 당신 like a drink?
Gambling Pony: What, and let ourselves get distracted 의해 the booze?
Audience: *Laughing*
Waiter: But we don't serve any alcoholic beverages.
Audience: *Laughing*
Gambling 조랑말 2: What kind of a casino doesn't serve alcoholic beverages?!
Audience: *Laughing*

---

It was 8 O' clock. Mike won seventeen games in a row.

Hawkeye: *Speechless*
Stylo: How do 당신 keep beating us?
Mike: I don't know.
Audience: *Laughing*

---

Song: link

Hawkeye, Stylo, Dan, Mirage, Metal Gloss, and Mike went back to the casino.

Hawkeye: 저기요 Mike, why don't 당신 play poker 의해 yourself, while we play something else?
Mike: But, didn't we come here to play poker together?
Hawkeye: Uh, who came up with that?
Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo: I didn't think of that.
Mirage: Was it anyone's idea?
Dan: I don't think so.
Metal Gloss: No one said we were playing poker together.
Audience: *Laughing*
Mike: Oh well. Have fun together. *Goes to play poker 의해 himself*
Metal Gloss: All right. Now we can make some real money.
Mirage: I don't know about 당신 guys, but me, and Dan decided we're going to try our hooves at Black Jack.
Hawkeye: Have fun with that. I'm going for slots.
Stylo: Same here.
Metal Gloss: I think I'll just watch.

At the Black Jack 표, 테이블

Dealer: *Sees Mirage put $800 on the table, so he does the same* Okay. Try to get as close to 21 as 당신 can. *Puts down a 3, and a 8* Do 당신 want to keep going?
Mirage: Just get me one card.
Dealer: *Puts down a 10* 당신 got 21. *Gives Mirage $1,600*
Dan: My turn. *Puts $700 on the table*
Dealer: *Does the same, and puts down two 7's*
Dan: Two 7's? Interesting. I think I'll stop there.
Dealer: Well played. Your 다음 card would have been a Jack.
Dan: *Takes the money* I'll do one 더 많이 round.
Mirage: Then after that, we're leaving.
Dealer: Double the stakes?
Dan: *Puts $1,400 on the table*
Dealer: *Does the same, and puts down a King, and Queen, and a 9* Looks like 당신 went over 21.
Mirage: Hold it. My friend did not ask for this card.
Dealer: Well, guess what? He got it anyway. So now, he has to-
Mirage: Don't bullshit us. 당신 give two cards, and only give out extra cards when the player asks for it. Speaking of which, shouldn't 당신 have two cards as well?
Audience: *Laughing*
Dealer: *Sweating* Security!!
Dan: Oh, like that's gonna-

A bullet hit the table, nearly hitting Dan.

Audience: *Laughing*
Mirage: We better get out of here! *Leaving with Dan*
Security Ponies: *Following them*
Stylo: That doesn't look good.
Hawkeye: What did they get their selves into?
Security: *Returning*
Dealer: Did they escape?
Security: Yeah, with all of that money.
Hawkeye: Well, I think it's time we go home.
Stylo: I agree.
Metal Gloss: *Leaves with the two stallions*
Mike: *Still playing Poker with other ponies*
조랑말 94: I'm losing to a Scottish retard!
Audience: *Laughing*
조랑말 49: This is ridiculous!

Episode 118

Orion: Sir, whatever 당신 do, please don't yell.
Pete: KEEP YOUR FUCKING MOUTH SHUT!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*

Episode 120

Pete was in his office, doing paperwork.

Pete: How many times are 당신 going to start an episode with me doing this?
Audience: *Laughing*

---

Stylo: 당신 have crossed the fucking line this time Gonzo!
Mike: Take it easy. All I did was crash the engines.

They explode behind Gonzo.

Audience: *Laughing*
Stylo: That's it. I'm taking a three 일 vacation, and I hope 의해 then, 당신 get common sense. *Leaves the train yard*
Mike: But common sense will turn me into a retard.
Audience: *Laughing*

---

Pete: This is perfect. This freight car is not going anywhere at all, so you'll stay here until I tell 당신 it's safe.
Orion: *Bumps into the car with his switcher*
Stylo: *Rolling down the 언덕, 힐 in the freight car* Is it still 안전한, 안전 sir?
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: I try helping him out, and this is the way he repays me. Wise 나귀, 엉덩이 wise cracks.
Audience: *Laughing*

The End

On the 다음 episode of Ponies On The Rails

Wait, there is no 다음 episode. Season 12 is the last season of this show

This is the best thing I've ever written, going from 2013 to 2016.